I was confounded now as much as he, and knew not what to say. I

thought many ways that I had the worst of it, but his saying he was

undone, and that he had no estate neither, put me into a mere

distraction. 'Why,' says I to him, 'this has been a hellish juggle,

for we are married here upon the foot of a double fraud; you are undone

by the disappointment, it seems; and if I had had a fortune I had been

cheated too, for you say you have nothing.' 'You would indeed have been cheated, my dear,' says he, 'but you would

not have been undone, for #15,000 would have maintained us both very

handsomely in this country; and I assure you,' added he, 'I had

resolved to have dedicated every groat of it to you; I would not have

wronged you of a shilling, and the rest I would have made up in my

affection to you, and tenderness of you, as long as I lived.' This was very honest indeed, and I really believe he spoke as he

intended, and that he was a man that was as well qualified to make me

happy, as to his temper and behaviour, as any man ever was; but his

having no estate, and being run into debt on this ridiculous account in

the country, made all the prospect dismal and dreadful, and I knew not

what to say, or what to think of myself.

I told him it was very unhappy that so much love, and so much good

nature as I discovered in him, should be thus precipitated into misery;

that I saw nothing before us but ruin; for as to me, it was my

unhappiness that what little I had was not able to relieve us week, and

with that I pulled out a bank bill of #20 and eleven guineas, which I

told him I had saved out of my little income, and that by the account

that creature had given me of the way of living in that country, I

expected it would maintain me three or four years; that if it was taken

from me, I was left destitute, and he knew what the condition of a

woman among strangers must be, if she had no money in her pocket;

however, I told him, if he would take it, there it was.

He told me with a great concern, and I thought I saw tears stand in his

eyes, that he would not touch it; that he abhorred the thoughts of

stripping me and make me miserable; that, on the contrary, he had fifty

guineas left, which was all he had in the world, and he pulled it out

and threw it down on the table, bidding me take it, though he were to

starve for want of it.




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