“Three years that he hated her.”

“What are you talking about?”

She gave me an incredulous look. “Come on, Alex. You had to have known. I thought you always did and it hurt my feelings. I could never figure out what I’d done so you wouldn’t confide in me, then last year I stopped caring. I stopped caring about a lot of stuff.”

Scratching at the back of my head, a foreboding sensation settled in the middle of my shoulders. It wouldn’t go away as I tried to figure out what she was talking about.

“Jesse.” Her head inclined a notch. “Are you serious?”

What?

“He’s liked you since forever. You never knew?”

“He was with Sarah. Three years, Marissa. He was with her for three years.”

“Yeah, but he didn’t want to be.” She lamented, “Okay, he might’ve liked her in the beginning, but he didn’t for a while after. I heard them fighting one time.”

“Sarah and Jesse?”

“Ethan and Jesse.”

This was the second person to talk about a dispute between my brother and his best friend. It sent daggers through me when Barbie had first said it and it sent daggers through me again. Ice-cold daggers with tips of steel. I didn’t like hearing about any discord between the two and I really didn’t like hearing that my best friend had known. She hadn’t said a word.

My lips were stiff as I demanded, “What are you talking about?”

“Jesse wanted to be with you. Your brother told him to stay away.”

He’d said the same thing to me, but there was a missing piece. I knew it. It was nagging me from the back of my mind. The puzzle wasn’t complete and I was determined to figure it out. With my lips pressed together, I gave her a pointed look. “Thanks for telling me.”

She flushed. “I’m sorry. Again. I was jealous.” She rolled her eyes. “He told Ethan he wanted to break up with Sarah and be with you, but your brother wasn’t having it. He threatened Jesse that if he broke up with Sarah, then he’d say something horrible to you. He was going to turn you against him.” Her laugh was hollow. “Your brother was hardcore, huh?”

Not the Ethan I knew.

Pain tingled at the tips of my fingers and toes. It was slowly working its way through me, all the way to send my heart into a tailspin.

The brother I knew would’ve never kept me from someone I loved.

Oh shit.

I drew in another shuddering breath.

I had loved Jesse then.

Had I stopped when he hadn’t returned my calls? Because I didn’t still love him. I couldn’t.

“You okay?”

I jerked my head in a nod. “Yeah.”

She wasn’t convinced.

“Look,” edging closer to me, Marissa glanced over her shoulder. “I know Jesse’s going to ditch her soon and she’s going to come back. I won’t say anything. I know you two were secretive before and I’m figuring you are now since you didn’t tell us where his house was.” She bit her lip and kicked at some dirt before her head came back up. “It’s no secret. She wanted to come down because she’s still obsessed with getting Jesse back. She’s dropped the perfect act. She’s hardcore, like your brother.”

Anger flared in me. Ethan wasn’t hardcore. She must’ve heard wrong.

“I’ve gone through a lot of my issues and I have a lot to say to you. I’m sorry about your parents. I knew what they were doing to you.”

Panic threatened me.

“I should’ve said something or done something, but I didn’t. I was a shitty friend to you, no matter what you think. I wasn’t loyal and I didn’t stand up for you.” Her frown deepened when she saw Sarah in the distance. “I hate feeling rushed. I wished you had met me for brunch. Listen, don’t trust Sarah. Don’t trust Angie.”

Angie? Her name was a lightning bolt. “What are you talking about?”

“Angie’s going to contact you.”

I sensed her withdrawal. Sarah was almost upon us and this new Marissa would disappear again. My hand latched onto her arm. “Did she tell you that?”

Startled, she looked up from my hand to my face. I felt the blood drain from me and knew she was seeing a ghost. Good. I was starting to feel like one again. She shook her head. “No, but I know Angie. She’ll take a semester off, see me at some party at Christmas, and I’ll tell her that I’ve seen you. She’ll hate that. She’s going to contact you, just for her conscience probably. She’ll think she’s the bad friend and she’ll hate that.” A smug grin came over her. “On second thought, maybe I won’t say anything at all. I like thinking of her as the bad friend.”

I was getting restless. Marissa was talking too much about the past. It was a year of hell and I wanted it remain behind me. She was dredging up past hurts, past feelings, and memories. All of them were better left buried. I snapped, “Shut up, Marissa!”

She jumped back.

“Just shut up. Stop talking about shit you don’t know anything about.”

“What?” Her mouth hung there for a moment. “But I do. I know what I’m talking about. Don’t trus—”

“Stop it!” My voice rose and I knew the last was a shout.

Sarah had halted a few feet from us, but she edged closer now. She’d grown cautious since my outburst. When Marissa jerked away, an evil grin came over her. She sauntered now, gloating, “Not so perfect now, Alex? I’m glad we ran into you at this pathetic picnic. I can’t believe my cousin told us hot guys would be here. Other than Jesse, I didn’t see anyone. They’re all freaks.”




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