"Join me?"
"Oh, that looks great," she said with feeling, taking it as he bent. She waved him down. "Sit, you're making my neck hurt."
He folded to the floor, pulling the book from her lap and turning it to read the title.
"I thought you were done with this. Just waiting on your assignment."
"I've only completed my first year of internship. I have three more to do in my field." That brought his head up. "Since I don't have any family, I'm using my leave time to work before I go back to St. Anthony's. But I still have to test constantly before the boards. It never hurts to keep studying." She looked at all the books. "I always feel as if there's something I've missed or forgotten to study."
Nash knew differently. Hayley had a photographic memory. It was one of the traits that got her incredible grades in college and scholarships. It also made him see what a great doctor she'd make and reminded him that she wasn't sticking around. Like his wife. Hayley had her dream and he wasn't part of it. She hadn't wanted to be his wife before she had her MD, and it was what had brought them to an impasse before. But Nash told himself he was wiser for it and his mistakes. He just didn't know why he couldn't handle her decision any more than he could seven years ago. Maybe because he felt totally excluded.
"You've done great for yourself, sprite."
She looked up from her notes.
"I admire your fortitude. Anyone else would have given up such an arduous task when they knew it would take two years longer than the norm."
Warmth spread through her and she smiled. "Thanks, Nash. That means a lot to me." It meant everything.
"You've done well with my house, too, especially since ten years ago it had a staff of five," he said.
Her brows shot up at that. "Maybe you should pay me more, then?" she said with a smile.
"Gladly. I've never seen my girls so happy."
Her expression turned tender and loving. "They're great kids."
For a second they stared, need and want and the denial of it mirrored in their eyes. The sensations passing between them had nothing to do with what they once were to each other. And everything to do with that they could be.
Nash warned himself to tread carefully and said, "How about I quiz you?" He pulled the book close and reclined on his side.
Hayley eyed him for a second, then leaned over and pointed to the chapter. Nash glanced, then formed questions, one after another. He flipped to a sample test and quizzed her. They sipped tea and halfway through the studying he left to bring back a snack for her and a beer for himself.
Two hours later she was slumped on the floor, yawning between responses.
Nash closed the book. "Bedtime, Hayley. Right now."
Her eyes closed and she smiled sleepily. "You like giving me orders way too much, Rayburn."
"Hell, yeah. This is the only time I ever could and you'll do it."
She met his gaze. "I never had anyone tell me what to do, not even my dad when he was alive. He was glad I just kept myself busy and out of trouble."
That neglect bred an independent woman who was afraid to get close to anyone, he thought. And afraid to relinquish any responsibility for her survival to another.
She lay back and stretched like a cat, arching her back, and Nash wanted to crawl over and feel her flesh beneath his palms, his mouth.
As if she'd read his thoughts, she instantly sat up, gathered her papers and books, then stuffed them into the briefcase.
Nash stood, and when she went to pick up the dishes, he stopped her. "I'll get them. Go on to bed."
He was close, gazing into her clear brown eyes, his fingers wrapped around her elbow.
"Thanks. Good night."
"Night."
He didn't move. Neither did she.
It took every effort to keep his muscles still, to not relent to the messages his brain was sending, to bend and take her sweet mouth with his. He held her gaze the way a prisoner seeks a key to freedom, wondering if there was any escape and wondering whether the release would be worth more time in his own jail. He hadn't been with many women since Michelle died. He hadn't wanted to. Women he'd dated were just people, nothing setting them apart from one another. Nash knew even if he'd just met Hayley, he would feel the same unending need to be with her.
God, this was harder than he thought.
And sex wasn't everything.
Trust was more. He let her go and stepped back.
"Night."
"See you at sunrise." She lifted her briefcase and headed for the hall, leaving him alone with his thoughts.
"Nashville Davis Rayburn!"
Nash cringed at the power of her voice and his full name filtering through the breeding barn. He looked over the horse's back.
"You bellowed, Miss Albright?"