He bent over me, fisting my shirt in his hands, and pulled my body from the ground as he leaned in closer. “All of this is your fault.” He dropped my body back down and swung with a closed fist. His hand connected with my temple, and the world spun on its axis as my body absorbed the blow. “I loved you,” he sobbed.
I cried, wailing as the pain took over. I gave up in that moment, just wanting it all to end. If I didn’t make it out of that trailer, I wanted it all to end quickly.
“Say something!” he yelled as anger took over. I covered my face with my arms to shield myself.
“Get it over with,” I moaned as I stared up at him.
He laughed and shook his head. “Your mother didn’t even give up this easily.”
Panic washed over me as the will to fight intensified. What have I done?
I scrambled out of the room on my hands and knees toward my mother’s room. Jackson was behind me as I pushed open her door. He grabbed my hair and jerked my head back hard. My mother’s bloody and beaten body came into view. She lay sprawled across the floor, her eyes fixed on nothing, unseeing.
“Oh, God! Jackson!” I screamed. His fingers released me and I scrambled to my mother’s side, pushing her onto her back.
“Mom!” I clawed at her shirt, desperate to wake her. I placed my cheek over her face, hoping to hear her breathing, but my head was spinning from the pain that Jax had inflicted upon me. I placed my mouth over my mother’s and pinched her nose shut. I tried to breathe life back into her as I began to hyperventilate. “Mama!” I clung to her lifeless body, praying away my life for hers. “You can’t,” I sobbed as my fingers uncurled from the blood-soaked fabric of her shirt. “You can’t leave me, Mom! Oh, God! What have you done?” My fingers were stained with my mother’s blood, and I rubbed them over my own clothes, desperate to remove any trace of it.
“You thought I was gonna just let you walk away, Cass?” His foot drew back and he kicked me hard in the back. My spine jerked straight and I fell to the floor at my mother’s feet. I screamed in agony as I tried to curl into a ball and protect myself. It wasn’t the first time Jackson had hit me, but this time I had infuriated him and unleashed the monster that had lain just below the surface inside him all these years. I didn’t know how far he would go, or if he would make good on his promise to end my misery for me. I had to protect my baby at any cost. I tried to push to my hands and knees again, scanning the floor for my phone. Jackson just laughed at my sobbing.
“Looking for this?” He tossed the phone onto the floor. I scrambled for it and flipped it open, praying I could stop my fingers from shaking long enough to dial Tucker’s number.
“Who is he, Cass? That fucking prick from the diner? I’ll fucking kill him.” Another kick. This one hitting me in the back of my thighs, sending the phone sliding across the floor into a sticky pool of blood.
“No one,” I screamed as I tried desperately to protect myself.
His blows stopped, but I didn’t dare try to look to see what he was doing. I had made that mistake before. You don’t ever leave your face open. Last time, I’d walked around with a bruised and swollen cheek for three weeks.
His hand twisted in my hair as he pulled me to my feet. The pain from my back shot through my body as I tried to steady myself. How long had I been here? My mind raced as I tried to count the minutes. It felt like an eternity. Tucker should be coming to look for me soon. I wasn’t sure it would be soon enough. Crippling pain radiated from my stomach and into my aching chest.
His face pressed against my cheek as he whispered in my ear, “You want to act like a whore? I will treat you like a whore.”
I wanted to vomit. I stumbled and tripped over my feet as he dragged me back to my room. My head was swimming in pain and my eyes were blurred by my tears.
“No! No!” My hands flew up to his as I clawed at him, trying to free myself. He laughed as he shoved me into the room. I kicked and bucked, desperate to get free.
He finally let go of my hair and I fell against the edge of my bed onto the floor. I quickly got to my feet and dashed for my dresser, grabbing in my arms my father’s bear that lay against the wall. I needed to leave, go anywhere but here.
Jackson cocked his head to the side and smiled. “That bear won’t protect you . . . just like your father didn’t protect you from the guys your whore of a mother brought in here.”
My blood was boiling now. I narrowed my eyes at him as I squeezed the bear to my chest. I just had to get past him. If I could get out the door, I could outrun him.
“That was another secret you were hiding from me.” His eyes glanced to the bear and he took a step closer. Jackson let out another sadistic laugh as he quickly closed the gap between us. His arms wrapped around my waist as he lifted me and threw me on the bed. I landed hard on my sore back, his body crashing on top of mine.
I beat against his chest with my fists, trying to pull my knees up between us. “I hate you!” I clenched my teeth as I struggled to fight him off. His hands found my wrists and he pinned my hands above my head with one hand. His smacked me hard across the face, and my mouth filled with the metallic taste of blood.
“Good.” He slipped his hand between us and hiked up my shirt.
“Help!” I screamed.
Jackson stilled for a second, listening before smiling down at me. “No one is going to help you, Cass.”
I pulled one of my hands free and struck him as hard as I could across the face. My palm burned from the harsh contact. Every ounce of rage and pain I had was in that hit. Jackson slowly looked back to me, a small trickle of blood oozing from his lower lip. His free hand shot up to my throat, gripping it painfully tight. I kicked and tried to fight against him, desperate for air. His eyes locked onto mine as he ground his hips into mine. His other hand tugged at my shorts, the material digging into my flesh as he yanked.
“Worthless fucking whore,” he snarled as his grip tightened again.
I could feel my face cooling from the lack of blood flow. I wasn’t scared to die, to end the pain, but I couldn’t leave this world looking into Jackson’s eyes.
A loud banging came from the front of the house. Tucker had come. He had come to save me. Jackson’s eyes fixed on mine for a minute and I prayed he wouldn’t kill me before I could see Tucker.
“Looks like the fun is over.” Jackson kissed me on the cheek and lifted his weight off my body. I desperately tried to catch my breath as he stumbled out of my room. I could hear the front door open, banging off the wall outside.
“Where the fuck is Cass?” I heard Tucker yell.
I wanted to run to him but my body was too weak and the pain too great.
“Why the fuck do you care?” Jackson snarled.
His words were immediately followed by a loud crack. I prayed that it was Jackson taking the blows, but I couldn’t be sure.
“Because I love her, you piece of shit.”
Jackson laughed, and there was another loud bang off the side of the trailer.
“She’s all yours, what’s left of her. I hope you don’t mind if I took her for one last ride,” Jackson spat back.
I crawled my way down the hall, ignoring the agonizing pain that shot through my stomach and what seemed like every nerve ending in my body. My hands and knees sloshed in the water as I knocked over the bucket that caught the rainwater.
“Confess your sins and be washed clean by the love of Christ.”
I pulled the front door open in time to see Tucker cock back his fist and land a hard blow to Jackson’s nose. Blood spurted from his nose, coating his shirt, and spraying onto Tucker. I was shocked that there was so much.
Jackson swung wildly but was unable to land a blow. Tucker stepped forward and grabbed Jackson by the collar of his shirt and brought his knee into Jax’s stomach. He made a deep, guttural groan as the wind was knocked out of him.
“Not so easy fighting someone your own size, is it?” Tucker taunted him.
“Fuck you!” Jax panted.
“This is for all of the times you hurt her. For all of the times I wasn’t here to protect her from you.” Tucker brought his elbow down into Jackson’s back, forcing him to his knees. He struggled to get back to his feet, and Tucker stepped back to let him. It was like watching a cat toy with a mouse. Not a side I ever expected to see from Tucker.
Jackson managed to make it to his feet, but he swayed as he struggled to keep his balance.
“I will fucking kill you!” Tucker was seething, and I knew he meant what he said. His arm came back again and Jackson didn’t even put his hands up to block him.
“Stop,” I screamed. There had been enough death and enough sadness for one day. I couldn’t witness any more.
Tucker spun around. His eyes grew large when he saw me on the floor, battered and bruised.
“Oh, God! Cass!” He rushed to me and picked me up in his arms like a baby.
As soon as I was safe against his chest, I began to sob uncontrollably.
“It’s okay. You’re safe now.” He ran his hands over my hair soothingly as he squeezed me painfully tight. My whole body ached.
“My mother . . .” I pulled back from him to look in his eyes. He pushed my face back into the crook of his neck.
“Shh . . .” He carried me across the room and sat me gently on the couch to look me over. “I’ll go find her.”
“No!” I clawed at his shirt, desperate to keep him by my side. “Don’t go back there.”
“It’s okay, Cass. I won’t leave you.”
More waves of pain shot through my body. His hand splayed across my belly, and I glanced down to my thighs and saw that they were now tinged red with blood. His gaze followed mine.
The pain and sadness in his eyes were enough to kill me. I should never have come back alone. I should have never lied and kept secrets from Jax. Now my baby and my mother had paid the price. I realized Jackson’s leaving me alive was the ultimate punishment. I would live with the guilt of their deaths for the rest of my life. Any pain I suffered I deserved and would endure.
I couldn’t look Tucker in the eyes for the rest of my life knowing what I had put him through. I made my mind up then and there that I had to save him from me.
Chapter Twenty-Four
TUCKER NEVER LEFT my side. I faded in and out of consciousness until the muffled sounds of sirens filled my ears. Tucker carried me out to the ambulance and placed me on the gurney.
Cops swarmed in from every direction but I could hardly keep my eyes open.
“Be on the lookout for a white male, early twenties, named Jackson Fisher. Suspect may be armed and is extremely dangerous.”
Tucker squeezed my hand as his face hovered over mine. “It’s going to be okay, sweetheart. It’s okay now. I love you. I love you so much.”
I tried to respond but my throat felt bruised and sore. I could feel the hands of others on me, checking my injuries. I let sleep take over as they worked to mend all but my broken heart.
“Sweet girl, why are you pouting?” My mother finished putting the bobby pins into my hair.
“Daddy is gonna miss my birthday. You promised he would be here!”
“You know he wants to be with you, baby. He just couldn’t make it.” My mother got up and hurried down the hallway to her room. I heard a few things shuffle around before she returned.
“What’s that?”
“Well, go on. Open it.” I took the box from her hand and pulled off the newspaper.
“It’s a teddy bear! Is it from Daddy?”
“Sure it is, baby.”
I jumped up and wrapped my arms around her neck, squeezing her as tightly as possible.
“Where am I?” I rubbed at my throat.
“Welcome back.” A cheery nurse smiled down at me and patted me on the shoulder.
The circumstances that landed me in this bed all came crashing down on me like a tsunami.