What?
I was really being stupid. We were both working so hard to shock the other half into being the first to break. So damned proud and so damned stupid. We’re both cowards, I thought.
When we heard a soft knock at the door, we all shot to our feet. Sean jumped up from the sofa out of his deep sleep, tripping a bit over his feet as he went to unlock the door. Reed walked in slowly and I stood completely still, clutching to the soft blanket wrapped around me. It took him some time before he realized I was there, but when he did, his eyes filled with something unrecognizable.
I dropped the blanket and walked over to him. His lip was split open a little and puffy and there were a few cuts and scrapes over his eye. I reached my hand up to tilt his chin so I could get a better look and he flinched a little at my touch, looking at me suspiciously.
Becky and Sean just watched as I took Reed by the hand and lead him upstairs to the bathroom. I sat him down on the edge of the bathtub and opened Sean’s medicine cabinet. He had some alcohol and cotton balls in there and a little Neosporin. I found a bandage and laid the supplies all out on the counter.
I tilted his face up to me again and opened the alcohol, dousing a cotton ball with the liquid. I pressed it softly to the scrapes above his brow, his face twitching a little from the sting. I worked at each one, putting antibiotic on the deep ones and covering them with the bandage. I leaned into the shower to grab the sponge and soaked it with cool water in the sink before slowly cleaning his swelling lip. The cut wasn’t very deep and it had stopped bleeding.
As I worked to finish cleaning him up I noticed his eyes intent on the corner of the bathroom floor. I turned to see what he was looking at and realized my dress was still lying there. It looked pretty torn and bad.
I lifted his chin to force him to look at me again. “Don’t think that,” I said quietly. “I tore it sliding under the gate…”
He looked at me with suspicion. “I promise,” I reaffirmed.
I was closing the bottle of alcohol when he grabbed my hands to stop me and took the bottle from me, setting it on the tub next to him. He stood up, towering over me as I stood there barefoot. He looked at my face intensely, brushing a little hair behind my ear and narrowing his eyes when he saw the bruising on my forehead.
He touched it gently with his thumb, shaking his head slowly. I took a deep breath and started to speak, but he quickly pressed his fingers on my mouth, staring at it as he slowly slid them along my bottom lip. He took the back of his hand and brushed it slowly from the top of my face down to the nape of my neck, looking at me adoringly, his gaze following the path of his hand.
Looking down, he reached for my hands that were fidgeting nervously in front of me now. He pulled them both into his own and brought them to his lips where he pressed a tender kiss to them several times, closing his eyes and then opening them to look at me with a sureness I hadn’t seen before.
“I am so sorry, Nolan. So sorry…for this,” he said, brushing a thumb over my sore cheek bone. “Sorry, for this,” this time brushing one over the scrapes on my forehead.
“But mostly, I’m so sorry for not taking care of your heart when you gave it to me. I’ve been a fool,” he chuckled softly. “At least, that’s what my dad says. But he’s right, usually is. I’ve been a fool.”
He reached up to my face and held it tenderly in his hands, his thumbs stroking my cheeks. “I broke you. Over and over. And then I blamed you for being broken…” I tried to interrupt, but he stopped me again. “No, let me say this.”
“I was never interested in Stephanie. Hell, Nolan. I haven’t honestly been interested in anyone since I met you. I don’t know when it happened, but somewhere along the way I fell for you. I fell f**king hard. And it made me stupid to see you with Tyler,” he clenched his jaw a little at Tyler’s name.
“But I was the one that was stupid, Nolan,” he looked at me intensely, tilting his face down more to make sure we were connected. “I know you think I don’t remember. I know you think I was probably too drunk, but it was the only moment of clarity I’ve had in months, Nolan. I love you. I meant it then, and I mean it now. I love you, with everything I’ve got. It’s the only thing I’ve got, and I’ve been terrified because I thought you were falling for him. But I’d be a fool if I didn’t tell you now.”
He pulled me closer, reaching his fingers into my hair, cradling the back of my head as he pressed a kiss to my forehead and then my cheek, stopping to look me in the eyes again. “I love you,” he was forcing me to take it in, believe it. And I did.