He stared into her eyes. The blue so deep and pure it was easy to get lost in them.
“Ronin? Are you okay?”
“Sorry. I’m great. My mind just traveled off track for a bit.”
“To where?”
“To how lucky I am that you’re in my life.”
She pressed her face into his neck. “I’m glad I didn’t do something weird and embarrass you.”
Ronin kissed the top of her head. “If you decide you don’t want to do a demo again, I’m fine with that.”
“Really?” Amery tipped her head back and looked at him. “Why?”
He wondered how honest he could be with her.
Or maybe it was how honest he could be with himself.
He tried to arrange his thoughts into some semblance of coherency.
“Sweetheart, talk to me. Don’t hold back how you feel—even if you think it’s something I might not like.”
“That’s the thing. It doesn’t have anything to do with you. Or your initial fear of being publicly bound.”
“Then what?”
“It’s been a while since I’ve done a demo with a woman I’m involved with. Now that I know what real love feels like, I realized I’ve never done a demo with a woman I love. When we’re in the practice room or anywhere we’re together, it feels right. Our being together like that is Zen for me. Tonight, it wasn’t . . . pure. And, baby, it didn’t have anything to do with you. What happened tonight was performance art. While that has its place, I am not a performer.” Ronin closed his eyes. “In the past few months with you? I really found the heart of what kinbaku is. It’s not about teaching others. It’s about teaching myself. It’s about creating art and beauty with love and trust. I never got that until you.”
“Are you trying to make me cry?” she asked softly.
“No.” Ronin tucked a hair behind her ear. “I’m trying to explain that tonight was more of an awakening for me than for you.”
“So you really aren’t okay.”
He sighed. “The only reason I joined this club was for access to rope models who wouldn’t freak out about what I needed. Any sexual contact would be safe because a health certificate is required to be a member of Twisted. After Naomi . . . it took me several months to want to do anything but the most basic configurations on a live model. And even then, I had to have some connection to the model to consider taking it further, and honestly it was so rare that I found that.” Ronin locked his gaze to hers. “Are you sure you want to hear this now?”
“If you’re ready to talk, I’m ready to listen.”
“Now I don’t know what else to say.”
“Are you afraid that now that I’ve done the public demo once and it didn’t cause me to freak out, it’s something I’ll want to be part of on a regular basis? Because that situation happened with Naomi?”
“Maybe. Are you?”
Amery shook her head. “I’d rather it just be the two of us. But I’ll admit it didn’t feel any different to me because I was blindfolded. In my mind, we were in the practice room.”
“In my mind too.” Ronin feathered his thumb across the dark mark beneath her eye that hadn’t completely faded in the past ten days. She’d done well covering it up with makeup, but he knew it was there.
“Stop staring. It’s almost gone. And I don’t want her here in this room with us any more than she already is.”
Ronin smoothed her hair back from her face. “Get dressed. I’ve got to talk to Knox about one thing before we go home.”
She gifted him with a fierce kiss, a claiming kiss that let him know he was hers just as much she belonged to him.
• • •
HIS need for her raged through his body like a fever.
The instant they stepped off the elevator, Ronin was on her. She made a surprised eep when he pushed her against the wall. Then his mouth covered hers in a kiss born of fire.
She tasted so damn sweet and hot. Like heaven, like home—like his. She clutched his shirt, returning his kiss with unrestrained passion.
“Baby,” he whispered against her throat. “You’re like a goddamn drug.”
“So take me.” She reached under his shirt and scraped her nails up his chest, pausing at his ni**les. “Use me.” She pinched the tiny tips hard. “Let me have the raw side of the rope master.”
Amery nuzzled his ear, outlining it from lobe to the inner shell, her tongue licking at the scar tissue with such wicked sensuality that he forgot he never let anyone mess with his ears.
“Every dirty, raunchy, nasty thing on your sexual arsenal . . .” She sucked the air clean out of his head, and his skin erupted in gooseflesh. “Do it to me. Without warning, without apology. We’ll make this a night we’ll never forget.” She nipped his earlobe hard enough to leave a sharp sting. “I’m yours. Prove it to me. Prove it to yourself.”
“Knees.” He pushed on her shoulders until she was on the floor before him. He tugged his gi pants down and clamped his hands on either side of her head, pulling her mouth to his cock. The head breached her lips, and he started to work himself deeper into her mouth with every pass.
Her hands gripped his thighs. She didn’t look up at him; she just let him f**k her mouth. Her saliva coated his c**k and made her chin and neck shiny and wet.
The visual of his shaft disappearing between her lips . . . Christ. Talk about f**king sexy. This hot, wet mouth of hers could bring a man to his goddamn knees. She sucked hard as he pulled his length out completely past her teeth, and she opened her throat when he shoved in so deep his balls hit her chin.