“She didn’t say anything about what went on last night because she didn’t know.”
“But she did fill you in on how it played out three and a half years ago between Naomi and me,” he said curtly.
When Amery didn’t respond right away, his gut clenched at the thought of digging up this mess again. Of Amery knowing. “Did Shiori divulge all the dirty details?”
“I don’t know. That’s why I thought we needed to talk about it.”
Ronin glanced up. “You know that Naomi was a plant from my grandfather to align her family’s business interests with ours. You know that I spent two goddamn years of my life with her, believing we had something . . . when it was all a lie. Everything was a lie.”
“That’s not what you initially told me,” she said softly. “Why?”
“Do you think I wanted you to know that my family paid a woman to be with me? To love me? And that I was so stupid and so goddamn desperate for it that I believed it was real? It appeared that Naomi accepted everything about me, and she never cared about my financial status. Surely a gold digger would’ve asked for money or support, but she never broached the subject. Which made it so f**king . . . humiliating when she told me that my grandfather had been giving her money every month as an incentive to stay with me.”
Amery moved in behind him and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Don’t let her back in your head. She doesn’t get to f**k up your life again. I won’t let that happen. It’s my life now too.”
He closed his eyes.
“And f**k the negative train of thought that women would only love you because you’re a billion-dollar baby.” She kissed his ear. “Baby, I fell in love with you before I knew you had billions.”
Shocked, Ronin slowly turned around on the barstool. “What did you say?”
“I said I love you. And you were right; I’ve been holding back on telling you. I don’t know why. I fell in love with you months ago. That night I gave you the picture of me bound? I’d planned to confess all, but I chickened out. I believed I had plenty of time, and I wanted the moment to be perfect.”
“Then, the next day, you walked out after you discovered—”
She put her fingers over his lips. “That you’d withheld so much from me that I felt like I didn’t even know the man I’d fallen in love with.”
“So you fell out of love with me?”
“No. But I did hold back from telling you all this time. Not out of spite, but out of fear.” Amery pressed her lips to his in a lingering kiss. “Because loving you is a scary thing, Ronin Black.”
“Amery. I’m . . .” Speechless. Instead of trying to find the words to fit the moment, he fit his mouth to hers, pouring everything in his heart and soul into the kiss.
When they finally ended the lip-lock, Amery said, “Wow.”
He nuzzled her neck. “Say it again.”
“Wow.”
He smacked her ass. “Say it again.”
“I love you.”
“I’ll never get tired of hearing that.”
“I’m sorry you ever doubted how I feel about you, Ronin.” She tipped his head back and brushed his hair out of his eyes. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about taking the Okada job. But I promise it wasn’t because I wanted to hurt you. Or that I don’t value you or your opinion. I f**ked up by not telling you. It won’t happen again. And I’d planned to come over last night and apologize before I found out about Naomi.”
“Thank you. Apology accepted.”
“Now. Don’t you have something else to say to me?”
Ronin twined a section of her hair around his finger. “I’m the luckiest man on earth because you love me.”
“Not that.” She placed her palms on his cheeks and tilted his face back. “You know it scares me that you won’t discuss what the doctor said at your follow-up appointment.”
Her fingertips brushed the tops of his ears, and he discreetly ducked his head to free himself from her touch. After years of fighting, his slightly disfigured cauliflower ears were a source of embarrassment for him and the main reason he wore his hair long—to cover them up.
“Ronin, I’m not letting this go.”
“The neurologist is being overly cautious. He insisted no contact sports and no practice with contact sports for six months. Then in the next breath he said—” He stopped. He didn’t want to tell her this.
Because you don’t want to believe it.
“Come on. Your life is an open book to me. No secrets, remember?”
Ronin couldn’t look at her. “He said that medical science was only now starting to understand the effects of repetitive brain trauma, and hopefully by the time some of those symptoms showed in me—because it was a given that they would—there’d be better drugs and medical options to treat it.”
“So you’re worried about long-term effects?”
“I wasn’t until he brought it up,” he said dryly.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I hate the thought of you walking away from me now because of how I might be in the future. Jesus, Amery, I realize how goddamn selfish that sounds.”
Amery curled her hands around his face. “Let’s focus on the short term for now, okay? Just getting you through the next six months without you stepping into the ring or sneaking into underground clubs to prove you’re the biggest badass in town, okay?”