“What’s your problem?” I asked, annoyed, and still keeping one eye on the door for Maggie.
He leaned forward. “My problem is, you’re going through hell right now. I want to help you, but I don’t know how. The person you want to help you has been through her own hell, and she doesn’t need you holding her hand secretly in the halls and fucking Serena in the damn bathroom hours later.”
Whoa. Okay, so he saw us holding hands this morning. That was what this was about. I got that.
“You’re my best friend, West. I can’t imagine what you are dealing with. But I do know Maggie doesn’t need you playing with her head. It’s not fair to use her, man. She lost both parents at once. In a fucked-up, crazy, horrific way. Don’t do this to her. Please, don’t hurt her.”
Serena sat down beside me before I could say anything else. “Y’all ready for the game tonight?” she asked in true cheerleader-pep style.
Brady glanced at her and gave her a smile that didn’t meet his eyes and nodded before dropping his gaze to his food.
I wasn’t hurting Maggie. It wasn’t like she had feelings for me in that way. I had been careful to keep this at a friends level. I mean, she hadn’t even liked me in the beginning. She understood me now, but she wasn’t attached to me. Was she? No, she wasn’t. She was too good for me, and deep down she knew it. I had explained to Brady that we were just friends. So, obviously, I was allowed to fuck other girls. And I wouldn’t hurt Maggie. Hell, I’d kill anyone who did.
Serena was saying something, but I didn’t hear her because Maggie had walked into the cafeteria. Her gaze immediately locked on mine. She smiled at me then turned away quickly. Like she did every day. She wouldn’t look at me long, and that smile wasn’t a real one. Why wouldn’t she look at me? Had I done something wrong?
Asa sat down on my left, and Gunner sat down beside Brady. Talk about tonight’s game soon took over, and I didn’t let myself worry about Maggie sitting outside all alone, reading in the fucking sun. I also managed to ignore Serena’s annoying laughter. We weren’t that damn funny. Why did she laugh so much?
You’re Much Stronger Than You Think
CHAPTER 19
MAGGIE
I need to talk to you.
I stared down at my phone. It was a text from West. He’d been upset this morning, but I left when Serena showed up. I wasn’t into watching them be all over each other. I was doing what I promised myself, and being his friend. That didn’t mean I had to like Serena.
Thursday I’d ended up in the restroom at the same time as her and some other cheerleaders. She was telling them how she had given West a blow job in the guys’ bathroom that morning. That particular image was one I wanted to cut out of my brain.
Even though being West’s friend did not mean I had to hang around him and his whatever she was, he had clearly been hurting earlier. His morning with his dad had to have been bad. Now it was time for the pep rally, though, so I wouldn’t get a chance to talk to him about it.
I moved out of the way of traffic in the hallway as everyone hurried to the gym so I could text him back.
Okay. Do you want to talk after the pep rally?
I sent the message and waited a minute to see if he replied.
“No, I want to talk now.” His voice was in my ear as his hand wrapped around my arm. Then he was moving me away from the crowd and down the empty hallway.
I didn’t ask where we were going. I just went.
He opened the door to a classroom that didn’t look like it was used anymore and guided me inside.
There were no desks in here. It was a small empty room with only one window. I turned to face him as the door clicked closed.
West closed the distance between us, but he didn’t touch me. He just stared down at me as if he were searching for some answer.
“I can’t do this tonight. I need to be home with my dad. He’s just getting worse. What if I’m out playing a game and he . . . goes? What then, Maggie? How will I forgive myself for not being there beside him? For not being there to hold my momma? She’s gonna need me.” His eyes became watery even though I knew he wouldn’t cry, and he rubbed his hand over his mouth and nose. “God, I can’t do this. I can’t. He loved football. We loved it. But I love him more.” He spoke each word as if it were ripping him open.
I reached over and took both of his hands in mine. That always seemed to calm him. “What would he want you to do? If it were his choice, what would your dad want?” I asked, already knowing the answer.
West sighed and hung his head. “He’d want me to play. He always wanted me to play.”
I didn’t say anything more. I let him think about it as we stood there. He laced his fingers through mine and held on to me as if he needed me to survive.
“What about my momma? She’ll be alone if I play.”
“Is there someone you can ask to stay with her during the game? Someone she trusts?” I asked him.
He lifted his head. “Your aunt.”
Aunt Coralee would be there in a second if he’d only ask. Brady would want her there. He wanted to do something to help. If he thought his momma missing his game to go sit with West’s mother would help, he’d want that.
“Ask her. She wants to help. Brady wants to help. Let them. If anything were to happen, I’d have her text me immediately, and I’d be on that field to get you.”
West’s eyes had dried up and he nodded, his jaw clenched, as if he were fighting the urge to scream. I knew how that felt. I had actually screamed, though. I hadn’t been able to control myself when I was faced with my mother’s death.