"There certainly are such drinks--" said Ani thoughtfully. "But will they only win hearts to young men! If that is the case, the old woman's trade is a bad one, for youth is in itself a charm to attract love. If I were only as young as Paaker! You laugh at the sighs of a man--say at once of an old man! Well, yes, I am old, for the prime of life lies behind me. And yet Katuti, my friend, wisest of women--explain to me one thing. When I was young I was loved by many and admired many women, but not one of them--not even my wife, who died young, was more to me than a toy, a plaything; and now when I stretch out my hand for a girl, whose father I might very well be--not for her own sake, but simply to serve my purpose--and she refuses me, I feel as much disturbed, as much a fool as-as that dealer in love-philters, Paaker."
"Have you spoken to Bent-Anat?" asked Katuti.
"And heard again from her own lips the refusal she had sent me through you. You see my spirit has suffered!"
"And on what pretext did she reject your suit?" asked the widow.
"Pretext!" cried Ani. "Bent-Anat and pretext! It must be owned that she has kingly pride, and not Ma--[The Goddess of Truth]--herself is more truthful than she. That I should have to confess it! When I think of her, our plots seem to me unutterably pitiful. My veins contain, indeed, many drops of the blood of Thotmes, and though the experience of life has taught me to stoop low, still the stooping hurts me. I have never known the happy feeling of satisfaction with my lot and my work; for I have always had a greater position than I could fill, and constantly done less than I ought to have done. In order not to look always resentful, I always wear a smile. I have nothing left of the face I was born with but the mere skin, and always wear a mask. I serve him whose master I believe I ought to be by birth; I hate Rameses, who, sincerely or no, calls me his brother; and while I stand as if I were the bulwark of his authority I am diligently undermining it. My whole existence is a lie."
"But it will be truth," cried Katuti, "as soon as the Gods allow you to be--as you are--the real king of this country."