Maybe, in this house that meant so much to him, he’d left something of himself behind.
David sat across from Lynnette in the same corner where they’d had a romantic dinner two years ago. He suspected she’d requested this particular booth. She was also wearing his favorite dress. Both of which made him inexplicably uncomfortable. He knew his son needed him, knew Lynnette needed him, too. He also knew that the best way he could be there for them both was to keep the family together. But the prospect of returning to the same situation was becoming more and more difficult to face.
“How was work?” he asked.
“Fine.”
He loosened his tie and unfastened the top button of his shirt. “You look like you’re feeling better today.”
“I have good days and bad days. This is a good day.” She took a sip of the ice water the waitress had brought before they’d ordered and studied him.
“What?” he said, arching his eyebrows at the intense scrutiny.
Her gaze dropped to her glass, which she began to turn around and around on the table. “I had sex with my date the other night.”
He hadn’t asked because he didn’t want to acknowledge his own ambivalence. “And?”
“I didn’t like it.” She shook her head, still staring at her glass. “It was…meaningless. Empty.”
“I’m sorry.”
Her eyes lifted. “You wish it had been better?”
“I’m sorry you’re so miserable. How well did you know him?”
“Not well enough. It was a desperate attempt to make my life feel real again. That was all.” She scratched her forehead in a gesture that revealed frustration at the same time it suggested she was thoughtfully selecting her next words. “I wanted it to be you every second, David, which made me realize something.”
He drank some of his own water, wishing he could put her on pause until he could overcome his growing reluctance. “What’s that?”
“I’m not over you. I don’t want to call it quits in spite of everything we’ve been through.”
David took a deep breath. At least her confession proved she was willing to work on their relationship. That was positive, wasn’t it? But it brought him no relief. It only made the metaphorical handcuffs chafe that much more: Till death do us part. “So you’re ready to try again?”
“Are you?” she asked hopefully.
Thinking of Jeremy, he wanted to jump at the chance. He’d promised it often enough. He wanted to make Lynnette happy, too. She’d been young, just twenty-one, when he promised her forever. With her improved attitude, maybe they could make it work. But when he thought of Skye, he longed to put as much emotional distance as possible between him and his ex-wife, regardless of her condition. How selfish was that? “It’s worth considering.”
She sat back, obviously shocked by his less than enthusiastic response. He was the one who’d decided to move out, both times, but all the complaints had come from her. He wasn’t giving enough to the relationship. She deserved more than she was getting. He didn’t love her anymore.
He feared she was right about the third one….
“Worth considering?” she echoed.
The waitress refilled their glasses and told them their meals would be out in a minute. David waited until they were alone again to respond. “We have to do things differently so it’ll work this time, Lynn.”
“Not a lot,” she said. “It’s your job. If you’d find something else, we’d be fine.”
His job? “And what would you have me do?”
“Become a P.I. Lots of cops become private investigators. You’d make more money, set your own hours, have less stress.”
“How would my being a P.I. help us?”
“Are you kidding?” Her expression grew intense. “It’d keep you from being called out in the middle of the night to some gruesome murder scene, for one thing. There’s going to come a time when I might need you to be home all night. And maybe, if you were working in a better environment, you’d be around the house more often and wouldn’t get so consumed with your job.”
He had a feeling Lynnette would be jealous of any pursuit that took his attention away from her. But his cell phone rang before he could say so. Using the distraction to give him a few extra seconds to formulate a response that might avoid starting an argument, he checked the caller ID—and promptly put the phone back in his pocket. It was Skye. He didn’t want to talk to her in front of Lynnette, and since she was calling from The Last Stand, there’d be numerous people around her, so he was sure she was okay. At least for now.
“Aren’t you going to answer that?” she asked.
“No.”
Her eyes narrowed. “If it was work-related you would’ve taken the call.”
Maybe, maybe not. But she was resentful enough to make that generalization. In his opinion, it was her inflexibility that had destroyed their marriage, not his job. “It can wait.”
For a moment, David thought his refusal to explain would put an end to their peace-making lunch. But she rallied.
“So what do you say? Are you willing to make a few changes? Try again?”
A few changes made it sound as if she wasn’t asking for much of a sacrifice. But giving up his position on the force could hardly be classified as minor.
“You’re always telling me you want to get back together,” she went on. “That you want to be a family for Jeremy.”
It had nothing to do with want. “I haven’t forgotten.”
“But you don’t want that badly enough to do something else for a living?”
Police work wasn’t just a job to him. It was a calling. She didn’t understand. Or maybe she did. Maybe that was why she was so jealous of his commitment to the force. “I like what I do, Lynn. I don’t see what you’re suggesting as a viable solution. But…give me a while to think about it.” He’d address it later. Maybe he could beat his stubborn resistance into submission. Then moving back in with her wouldn’t seem like such a miserable option.
“How long?” she asked.
When his phone rang again, she rolled her eyes and motioned for him to take the call.
He didn’t apologize, despite her obvious annoyance. He was a detective; he needed to be available at all times. And the number on his caller ID indicated it was the station. “Excuse me.”