He eyed her with a wary expression, probably not sure if he should quit while he was ahead.
She smiled. "Why don't we go shopping tomorrow and we'll both get what we want instead of what other people want us to wear?"
He looked uncomfortable. "You mean just you and me?"
Of course. What teenage boy wanted mommy taking him around to buy clothes? She shook her head.
"I'll give you the money and you can shop in a men's store while I shop for my things. I'll pick you up when you're done."
He nodded, apparently still waiting to hear the rest of the story. "If I had a cell phone, I could call you when I was ready."
She tapped the counter with her fingernails and counted to ten before responding.
"Don't push it, Jonathan."
His smile was reminiscent of earlier years when he was more pliable. For a moment she felt sad. Those years were gone forever. Jonathan was growing up fast. He needed room to grow into a man. He needed the influence of a man. Was Alex shutting Jonathan out the way he was with her?
That evening as they prepared for bed, she talked to Alex about it.
"How would you like to take Jonathan shopping?"
He glanced up as he pulled the covers back.
"Why? Don't you have time?" he asked with the same wary look Jonathan gave her.
"I have time," she responded, pulling the covers back and fluffing her pillow. "I just think he needs the influence of a man."
He eyed her a moment longer and then sat down on the edge of the bed, kicking his slippers off.
"At least you consider me a man."
Carmen caught her breath. "You know I consider you a man. You're more of a man than any man I've ever known."
He crawled into bed and pulled the covers up without responding.
Why would you say a thing like that?" she persisted.
He lay on his back, hands folded on the blankets, eyeing her skeptically.
"If you think I'm more man than Gerald, then why did you call him instead of me?"
She stared at him, digesting the idea that they were back to square one. Obviously the answer she had given him in the beginning hadn't satisfied his need. She had considered calling him first, but he was at work. Gerald was at the guest house - closer. But Gerald must have immediately called Alex. Of course he would. Why didn't she think about that at the time? She was injured and in peril. Alex had the right to know. She should have called Alex first. Of course, there was the other thing. She would have had to tell Alex that she had gone up to the graves alone.