“Don’t go.” His hand reached for me but I sidestepped him, my face already pinched into what had to be the mother of all fake smiles.
“It was nice to meet you.” I nodded toward his parents. “But I just remembered that I have this, um, thing and I have to be back in Philly before nine, so…” My voice trailed off and I knew that they knew I was full of shit, but they were too polite to say anything.
I gave a half wave before anyone could say anything and practically ran into the house, my eyes searching frantically for my car keys. The door banged behind me and I knew Ben had followed me inside.
I didn’t want to face his questions. I just wanted to get the hell out. Shit. Where the fuck were my keys?
“Georgia.”
“I don’t want to talk about it, Ben. Really. It happened over three years ago…and it’s not a pretty story and I…please just let me go.” Mother fucker. My voice was cracking. I really needed to leave.
The keys were not where I left them. I shoved aside a bunch of advertisements and the relief I felt when I saw the black and silver key ring was huge. Huge. My chest was tight and it was getting hard to breathe. I knew that if I didn’t get my ass out of here soon I was going to lose my shit in front of Ben and his parents, and I would rather die than have them see me like that.
I was headed for the front door and my fingers curled around the handle when Ben’s voice cut through the fear inside me.
“You’re just going to leave? What the fuck, Georgia? You tell me that your parents are dead and then freak out and you’re just going to leave?”
He was behind me. I felt him as if he was pressed up against me.
“Let me help you with this. Let me be there for you.”
“Please, Ben,” I whispered. “I can’t do this.” Panicked I yanked hard on the door. “I have to go. I’m sorry.”
“This is bullshit, Georgia.” His voice was hard.
“I can’t share this with you. Not yet.”
I slipped outside, half expecting him to come after me. He didn’t.
And I don’t know what upset me more. The fact that I knew he was pissed at me for leaving, which he had every right to be, or the fact that he hadn’t bothered to come after me.
Either way it didn’t matter. Twenty minutes later I pulled over onto the side of the road and lost my shit. I cried hard. I cried until my eyes smarted because they were swollen. I cried until my nose ran and my skin was itchy from the salty tears. I cried until there was nothing left in me and even then I huddled in the front seat, my arms wrapped around myself, shaking uncontrollably.
And then I sat for nearly an hour, watching the headlights of the oncoming cars blur as they sped by. I sat there until dusk fell and the stars came out.
I sat there until I was empty and then I went home.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Ben
My parents stayed for three days and for three days Georgia stayed away. The first two, we didn’t talk. She never showed up to paint and I refused to call her. As much as I wanted to be there for her, I couldn’t get past the way she had just run out. Like I didn’t mean anything to her. Like what we shared didn’t rate an explanation.
And sure I was being a bit of a dick—I knew it wasn’t about me—but I couldn’t help the way I felt. I’d never been ditched like that before and it sucked.
My parents were cool. They never said anything about the way she’d bolted or the fact that she hadn’t come around since. We had a good visit, caught up on some family shit and then they were gone.
The third day, yesterday, Georgia called but I wasn’t overly friendly on the phone even though I wanted to see her so bad it was all I thought about. But then she wasn’t either. I didn’t know what had changed between us, I only knew she wasn’t interested in fixing whatever the hell it was and that pissed me off even more than I already was.
She didn’t say she was coming out to my place, and I didn’t invite her. I told her Jack Ryan, Rick Daniels and Ball-less Boone—former teammates of mine from LA—were coming out for a few days to chill before training camp started. Georgia asked if they were bringing girls with them and I answered without thinking.