‘No, I suppose not. Are you really going to let Teovin in to see him tomorrow?’
‘Maybe we should. We’ve been stalling Kolata’s underlings for three days now, and I’m starting to run out of excuses. We’d better let one of them see him, or they’ll start to get suspicious.’
‘I’m not sure it’s a good idea, but maybe you’re right. Alean, do be a dear and run down to the kitchen. Tell the cooks not to drug Minister Kolata’s supper tonight.’
‘Yes, your Majesty,’ the girl replied.
‘You might want to tell them to give him an emetic instead,’ Stragen suggested.
‘Why would we want to do that?’ Melidere asked.
‘Emperor Sarabian just told the excellent Teovin that Kolata’s been throwing up all day. We wouldn’t want people to start accusing his Majesty of lying through his teeth, would we? Minister Kolata should show some signs of illness when Teovin visits him tomorrow. A good strong emetic should take care of that.’
Alean giggled wickedly.
The Royal Princess Danae sat on a divan. She was carefully dressing Mmrr in a new doll’s gown. Over the centuries, Aphrael had noticed that little Elene girls did that quite frequently. It didn’t really make any sense to the Child Goddess, but since it was a long-established custom – ‘Oh, quit,’ she murmured to her struggling cat. ‘I’m not hurting you.’
Mmrr objected loudly, giving vent to a plaintive yowl filled to the brim with a heart-rending self-pity.
‘Teovin was right about one thing,’ Stragen was saying to the rest of them. They had all gathered in the royal apartments again, and the Thalesian thief was holding forth once more. Danae liked Stragen, but the fact that he absolutely adored the sound of his own voice made him a bit tedious at times. ‘The Ministry of the Interior would die en masse before they’d destroy a single scrap of paper. The documents they pulled out of those files are somewhere in the building, and those documents would tell us things we haven’t even guessed as yet about the conspiracy. I’d give my teeth to get a look at them.’
‘And spoil your smile, Stragen?’ Melidere objected. ‘Bite your tongue.’
‘I was speaking figuratively, of course.’
‘He’s probably right, your Majesties,’ Caalador agreed, forgoing the dialect. ‘Those original documents would be an absolute gold-mine. I don’t know that I’d give my teeth, but I would give a lot to browse through them.’
Danae rolled her eyes. ‘Elenes,’ she said under her breath. ‘If it’s all that important to you, Caalador,’ she said, ‘go look at them.’
‘We don’t know whur it iz they got ‘em hid, little dorlin’.’
‘Look for them, Caalador,’ she said with exaggerated patience. ‘You’ve got all night every night for the next month or two, haven’t you? Talen told me once that he can get into any house in the world in under a quarter of an hour. You two are more experienced at it, so it probably wouldn’t take you nearly as long. You’re not going to steal the papers, all you’re going to do is read them. If you’re just a little careful to put them back where you found them after you’re finished, nobody will even know that you’ve seen them.’
Caalador and Stragen looked at each other sheepishly. ‘Why didn’t we think of that?’ Stragen asked his friend.
‘It seems to me I’ve already told you why once,’ Melidere said. ‘Shall we go through it again? It’s really a very good idea, Princess. These two might not be much good at thinking sometimes, but they’re probably very good burglars. They both have that shifty, unreliable look about them.’
‘They do just a bit, don’t they?’ Danae agreed. She set Mmrr down on the floor. ‘There,’ she said, ‘isn’t she adorable?’
The angry lashing of Mmrr’s tail, however, totally spoiled the effect.
‘The tail definitely detracts from the fashion statement, Danae,’ Sarabian laughed indulgently.
‘Oh, I can fix that right up, Sarabian,’ she assured him. ‘I’ll tell you what, Mmrr. How would you like to have me tie a big pink velvet bow right on the end of your tail to sort of set things off? You could wave it around like a parasol if you wanted.’
Mmrr’s tail stopped in mid-swish.
‘I thought you might see it that way,’ Danae said.
‘Shall we go down to the dungeon for your fencing lesson, your Majesty?’ Stragen suggested. ‘Caalador and I are going to be busy being burglars tonight, I think.’
‘Not only tonight, I’m afraid,’ Caalador added. ‘I haven’t been on a roof in years.’
‘It’s like swimming, Caalador,’ Stragen said. ‘Once you learn how, you never forget.’
‘I’d really like to forgo the lesson today, Milord Stragen,’ Sarabian said. ‘I’m still sore from yesterday.’
‘Fencing is not like swimming, your Majesty,’ Stragen told him. ‘You have to practice continually. If you’re going to wear that rapier, you’d better know how to use it. In a tight situation, that could be your last line of defense.’
Sarabian sighed. ‘Sometimes I wish I’d never even heard of Elenes,’ he mourned.
‘Because Ehlana told me to,’ Mirtai said as she, Engessa, Kring and the two thieves crossed the document-littered lawn toward the Interior Ministry. ‘She wants to be sure that nobody interrupts you.’
‘Mirtai,’ Stragen said with a pained look, ‘I love you like a sister, but burglary’s a fine art.’
‘I think my beloved can manage, friend Stragen,’ Kring said. ‘I’ve seen her walk through a pile of dry leaves and not make a sound.’
‘I just don’t like it,’ Stragen complained.
‘You are not required to, Stragen-thief,’ Engessa told him. ‘Ehlana-queen said that Mirtai-daughter will go with you, so she will go.’
Mirtai smiled up at the towering Atan. ‘Thank you, Engessa-father. It’s so hard to make Elenes grasp reality sometimes.’
‘Engessa and I are going to relieve the two knights watching over the documents on the lawn,’ Kring told them. ‘We’ll stay fairly close to the building, and we have other men nearby. Call if anyone surprises you in there, and we’ll come in and rescue you.’
‘I’ve never had a platoon of soldiers standing watch for me while I burglarized a building before,’ Caalador noted. ‘It adds a whole new dimension to the business.’
Stragen grunted sourly. ‘It takes a lot of the fun out of it. A large part of the thrill of burglary comes from the danger of getting caught.’
‘I’ve never tried burglary,’ Kring admitted. ‘It’s not much of a challenge among the Peloi, since we all live in tents. A sharp knife will get you into the stoutest tent in the world. If we want to ransack someone’s encampment, we usually send in some men to run off his horses. He chases those men, and that gives us a free hand.’
‘Burglary’s a crime of stealth, Kring,’ Stragen smiled. ‘You get to sneak around at night and climb over rooftops. It’s a lot of fun – and really quite profitable.’
‘Be careful up there on that roof, Mirtai,’ Kring admonished his betrothed. ‘I went to a great deal of trouble winning you, and I’d hate to lose you at this point. Oh, speaking of that, friend Stragen – and you too, friend Caalador – if anything happens to her, you do know that I’ll kill you, don’t you?’
‘We wouldn’t have it any other way, friend Kring,’ Stragen smiled.
Mirtai ran a caressing hand over her beloved’s scalp. Stragen had noticed that she did that quite often. He wondered if the feel of the little fellow’s shaved head might have had some bearing on her decision to marry him. ‘You need a shave,’ the giantess said. ‘Remind me in the morning, and I’ll take care of it.’
Then Stragen, Caalador and Mirtai, all dressed in close-fitting black clothing, slipped through the shadows of a grove of trees near the Ministry of the Interior. ‘You’re really fond of the little fellow, aren’t you, Mirtai?’ Stragen murmured softly, ducking under a tree-limb.
‘Kring? He’s a suitable sort of man.’
‘That’s a rather lukewarm declaration of passion.’
‘Passion’s a private thing. It shouldn’t be displayed in public.’
‘Then you do have those feelings for him?’
‘I don’t really see where that’s any of your business, Stragen.’
There was a filmy layer of fog lying on the lawns of the imperial compound. It was autumn now, and the fog crept in off the Tamul Sea every evening. The moon would not rise for hours yet, and all in all it was a perfect night for a burglary.
Caalador was puffing when they reached the wall surrounding the Ministry of the Interior. ‘Out of condition,’ he muttered.
‘You’re almost as bad as Platime,’ Stragen told him, speaking very softly. Then he squinted upward, swinging a heavy grappling hook in his hand. He stepped back and began to whirl the hook in a wide circle, letting out more rope with each circuit. Then he hurled it upward with the rope trailing behind it. It sailed up over the wall and fell inside, striking the stones with a metallic-sounding clink. He tugged down a couple of times to set the points in place. Then he sat down on the grass.
‘Aren’t we going up?’ Mirtai asked him.
‘Not yet. Somebody might have heard it. We’ll wait until his curiosity’s had time to wear off.’
‘Fellers what’s a-standin’ watch in the middle o’ the night ain’t really all that eager t’ go lookin’ fer where it is ez noises is a-comin’ from, dorlin’,’ Caalador explained. ‘It’s been my experience that they usually feel that a quiet watch is a good watch, so they don’t go out of their way to investigate things. As long as nobody sets the building on fire, they’re not overburdened with curiosity. B’sides,’ he added, dipping once again into the dialect, ‘fellers ez gits chose t’ stand gord at night usual turns out t’ be drankin’ min, an’ after a flagon er two, they can’t really hear hordly nuthin’ a-tall.’ He looked at Stragen. ‘Do you want to try the ground floor before we go up on the roof?’ he asked in clipped Elenic.
‘No,’ Stragen decided. ‘Ground-floor windows are always double-checked when people lock up, and watchmen pass the lonely hours of the night rattling door handles and trying the windows close to the ground. I’ve always preferred attics myself.’
‘What if all the attic windows are locked as well?’ Mirtai asked him.
‘We’ll break one.’ He shrugged. ‘The building’s high enough so that a broken window won’t be all that visible from the ground.’
‘Don’t be too obvious, Stragen,’ Caalador cautioned him. ‘I’ve got the feeling that we’ll be going back inside every night for the next week or two. That’s a large building.’
‘Let’s get at it, then,’ Stragen said, rising to his feet. He looked out across the lawn. The fog had grown noticeably thicker. He tugged down on the rope a couple of times to make sure that the hook was secure, and then began to climb up.
‘You go on up next, dorlin’,’ Caalador said quietly to Mirtai.
‘Why do you call me that?’
‘Jist a-bein’ friendly-like. It don’t mean nothin’ personal, so don’t go complainin’ t’ yer bow-legged beau. He’s a likable sort, but he shore is touchy where yer concerned.’
‘Yes,’ Mirtai agreed. She went quickly up the rope and joined Stragen atop the wall. ‘What now?’ she asked.
‘We’ll go across to the roof and start checking attic windows just as soon as Caalador climbs up.’
‘You’ll use the hook again?’
He nodded.
‘Burglars are about half-ape, aren’t they?’
‘We prefer to think of ourselves as agile. Now then, if we run into anybody inside, we’ll try to hide first. If that doesn’t work, we’ll rap him on the head. Caalador’s carrying a wineskin, and he’ll pour wine all over the man. The smell of that should make him less credible when he wakes up. Try not to kill anybody. It takes all night to clean up, and we’d have to carry the body away when we leave. This isn’t an ordinary burglary, and we don’t want anybody to know we’ve been here.’
‘You’re repeating the obvious, Stragen.’
‘I’ve seen your instincts in operation before, love. If you do kill somebody, please try to leave most of the blood inside the body. I don’t want to be caught in there with a mop in my hands when the sun comes up.’
‘Why are you both being so affectionate tonight?’
‘I don’t think I quite followed that.’
‘Caalador’s been calling me “darling” ever since we set out, and you just called me “love”. Is there some sort of significance to that?’
He chuckled. ‘A gang of burglars is a very close-knit group, Mirtai. We depend on each other for our very lives. That creates powerful ties of affection – which usually last right up until the point when the time comes to divide up the spoils. That’s when things sometimes turn ugly.’
‘Let’s have it all in place before we make any overt moves, Sarabian,’ Ehlana counseled. ‘The Interior Ministry knows that we’re up to something, but we’re all pretending that everything’s normal. The customary approach is to have everybody in custody before you start issuing proclamations and disbanding branches of government.’
‘I can see your point, of course,’ he agreed. They were standing atop the battlements again, looking out over the city as the sun rose above the thick ground fog. ‘That’s pretty, isn’t it?’ he observed. ‘The color of the fog almost perfectly matches the mauve on the walls and domes.’
‘You have a beautiful city.’
‘With some not-so-beautiful people living in it. What am I going to do for a police force after I dissolve the Ministry of the Interior?’
‘You’ll probably have to declare martial law.’
He winced. ‘The Atans won’t make me very many friends, I’m afraid. They tend to have a very simplified concept of justice.’