I waited for Lianne’s nod before I turned away.
Still in my sweaty running clothes, I went downstairs to my own bathroom. I showered and dressed. Bickley was still passed out in his bed where I’d left him a couple of hours before.
This morning I’d almost slept in too, skipping the run. If I hadn’t gone, Bella might still be sprawled on the sidewalk somewhere. The idea made me feel sick.
I was hunting for a pair of clean socks when there was a tentative knock on our outer door. When I opened it, Lianne stood there, looking uncomfortable. “She’s still in the shower,” she said.
“Okay.” A long shower wasn’t the end of the world.
Lianne bit her lip. “She sounds really upset. But when I tried to ask her if she needed help, she just screamed at me. She doesn’t want me in there.”
Dios. “Do you want me to try to talk to her?”
Lianne nodded.
“All right.” I headed up the stairs followed by Lianne. On the landing, I caught her elbow. “Hey. Can you tell me who Bella does talk to? Does she have a girlfriend I could call? Someone she trusts?”
Lianne looked thoughtful. “Bella doesn’t have girlfriends. She hangs around with the hockey team.”
“Well…” I couldn’t exactly start dialing from the top of the team roster. “Anyone special?”
“I don’t know their names. One of them speaks a lot of French.”
I remembered that guy from Casino Night, but had no idea who he was. And for all I knew, he was the one who hurt her. “Can you let me into the bathroom?”
Lianne led me through her room. When I entered the bathroom, the shower curtain was only partially closed, and I could see movement. Bella was seated on the shower floor, furiously scraping at her skin with a bar of soap. “Damn it, damn, damn,” she chanted. I took one step closer. The skin on her leg was raw-looking and red.
“Bella,” I said. I think I startled her. She dropped the soap and folded over herself. “Come on out of there now,” I said as gently as I could. She didn’t answer me. She only hugged her bent knee more tightly, her face turned away from mine.
Jesucristo. Someone needed to help Bella get a grip. Since there was nobody else handy, seemed like that someone was going to be me.
I stuck my arm into the shower, turning off the water. Towels hung from hooks on the opposite wall. I grabbed the largest one and draped it over Bella’s dripping back and shoulders. “Come on now. Stand up.”
She didn’t move.
“Get up, princesita.” I spoke to her the way I might address one of my cranky little cousins who needed a nap. “Come on now. Get up or I’m going to pick you up.” I didn’t really want to make good on that threat. Luckily, Bella didn’t want me too, either. She gathered the edges of the towel together and rose, her back to me.
I gave her some space. Bella stepped out of the shower, avoiding my eyes. I followed her into her room, averting my gaze while she wrapped the towel properly across her chest and under her arms.
When she sat down on the bed, I noticed that although the skin on her legs was rubbed raw, I could still see the faded outlines of the words written there. The marks were still quite dark on her shoulders and upper arms, too.
Bella saw me looking and clamped her arms across her chest, hands over her shoulders. “I want you to leave me alone.” She spared me a single glance, and it was full of pain.
Instead of obeying, I sat down beside her on the bed, but not too close. “I’ll go if you call someone else to be here with you.”
She made an irritated noise. “I don’t want company, Rafe.”
“That’s too bad,” I said as gently as possible. “But it’s me or a friend. Because honestly, I feel like I should go get the house dean.”
Bella’s blue eyes widened with horror. “Don’t you fucking dare. I don’t need the dean. I don’t need you. I just need to…” She broke off, rubbing at a spot on her upper arm with her thumb. The ink was particularly dark there. She scraped at it with her thumbnail — the letter “D” in DIRTY BITCH. Still pink from the hot water, Bella’s skin looked tender.
While I watched, Bella made an angry red scratch across her velvet skin.
I wasn’t even thinking when I reached out, but I couldn’t stand to see her hurt herself any more than I could stand the words on her skin. I covered up the scratch with my hand, knocking her clawing finger out of the way.
She froze solid under my touch.
“Don’t hurt yourself. Please,” I begged.