I just bet you would, she thought, inhaling deeply to steady herself. ‘The world is full of impressionable females.’ Her tone made it quite clear she didn’t categorise herself as one of these.
She was getting her message across loud and clear. ‘Your world might be full of them, but I meet precious few,’ Benedict responded drily.
‘Perhaps you’ll have more luck in the outback?’ He was actually serious; it finally filtered into her consciousness. He was going. Would he really give up a lifestyle most people would envy?
‘Australian women are certainly refreshingly open.’
‘Are they the main reason you’re going there?’
‘Careful, Rachel, you’re sounding jealous,’ he pointed out smoothly. He ignored her strangled squeak of denial and continued smoothly. ‘My grandmother left me a cattle station in Queensland when she died four years ago. I put in a manager and left it to take care of itself until last year when he walked out and it became painfully clear he’d been siphoning off profits.’
‘Oh!’
‘Oh, indeed, especially as Nina left me land but very little capital. Remember we’re talking a different scale; put the station in Britain and think a small village. A lot of people’s livelihood depends on its continued prosperity. Overstocking plus drought had left the place in a pretty bad way. I went out to sort out the legal wrangles and put another manager—one I could trust—in his place. If it wasn’t for my mother’s sentimental attachment to the place—she was brought up on the Creek—I might well have put it on the market. It was just one big hassle.’
‘Was?’
Benedict grinned and she realised she’d never seen his eyes burn with quite that sort of enthusiasm before.
‘It still is, but the place has a way of getting under your skin. My life has always been so predictable: pass exams before and with higher marks than the next guy; be the first, the best… It stopped being a challenge years ago. Connor’s Creek is different; the land is…’ He gave an almost self-conscious shrug. ‘To cut a long story short I kept putting off finding a manager and in the end I didn’t bother.’
‘You never intended staying here?’ Did I come under the heading of time-filler—a handy stopgap? she wondered bitterly.
‘I left my options open.’ Deep down he knew that wasn’t really true; he’d always known he was going back.
‘I can’t see you…’
‘The suit does come off…remember? I had a hard time convincing the people there I was serious too. Some people go too much on appearances.’
She did remember what he looked like without the suit and suddenly it wasn’t so hard to think of him getting his hands dirty working under some vast, alien blue sky. She could imagine him relishing shrugging off the constraints of civilisation and undertaking a task that required not just his mental tenacity but also his physical endurance.
‘Your family won’t be happy.’ Why did she feel like this—so empty? She was physically attracted to him, nothing else. His leaving was a perfect solution in many ways to her own problem. No Benedict—no problem.
‘Dad’s got an heir apparent; he just doesn’t realise it yet.’
‘What about law—your career?’
‘It’ll survive without me. To be honest this has always bored me.’ His shrug took in their surroundings.
‘Perhaps that’s why you throw yourself so wholeheartedly into the social whirl—you’re compensating for your stifling professional life? Pardon me for saying so, but that all sounds a bit glib. Who’s to say you won’t get bored with playing cowboy in few years’ time?’
‘Leave the bitter irony to me, Rachel; it doesn’t suit you.’ His quiet tone made her feel uncharitable and plain mean. ‘Not many people find a place they know they’re truly meant to be. When I make up my mind what I want I’m not easily deflected.’
The warning in his words made her shiver. If she didn’t tear her eyes away from his, critical meltdown was imminent!
If anyone had told him a year ago that a man could become emotionally attached to a place, a piece of land, he’d have laughed. Now he knew differently. As he’d explored the vast expanse of land they called the Creek he’d found himself envying the men who had settled this area, who’d been the first. This rapport with the land wasn’t something he could put into words—wasn’t something he could explain to anyone.
‘It’s a big step to take,’ she said huskily.
‘They’re the only ones worth taking, Rachel.’ He extended his hand and she realised she was still sitting on the floor, her fingers clutching a pile of papers. Her hand slid inside his and he pulled her to her feet. With a tiny jerk of his arm he drew her closer and she automatically raised her eyes to his.