“You’d never have let me tell Con, and your safety is more important than me pissing you off. Now are you gonna give this old man a break or what? You know if anything happened to you on the way home from the gym, it’d just about break me.”
Danny Driscoll was tough as nails, and I doubted that anything could break him, but he was tugging on my heartstrings, and he knew it.
“I don’t like it, Danny,” I sighed, with exasperation.
“You don’t have to like it, but humour the old man, okay?”
I’d had my little temper tantrum, but a fat lot of good it had done me. Trust wasn’t an easy thing for me to give, but the decision to trust was sort of out my hands now. Danny was only trying to look out for me. I’d said my piece, so the best thing I could do would be to act graciously about all this.
“Fine,” I sighed again, leaving the office. Okay, so not too graciously, but Danny got what he wanted, and I was sure he wasn’t too bothered. The only question to ask now was how did I make conversation with a man like O’Connell for twenty minutes, twice a week, without hyperventilating? By the time I made it back downstairs, I found O’Connell leant against the doors with his hands shoved in the pocket of his hoodie, like he didn’t have a care in the world.
“Sorted?” he asked. I answered with a nod, and we walked side by side, all the way home, in awkward silence. I caught him staring at me every now and then, though I pretended not to notice. You could see that he was keen to make conversation, but after today, I kind of needed the quiet.
“You don’t like me much, do you, sunshine?” he interjected, as we were almost home. I was horrified that he’d misinterpreted my fucked-up issues that way.
“Of course, I do. I warned you that I don’t really do friends. I’ve been on my own for a long time now, so it’s going to take me a while to get used to this,” I answered, as I gestured between us.
“Well, it makes a nice change,” he replied. “Usually it’s me who fucks things up. So what’re you doing this weekend?”
“Um...” I wasn’t sure how to answer. I had a couple of shifts at the diner, and then I planned on doing laundry and catching up on some assignments. This was not what most girls my age would be doing on a Saturday night, and too embarrassed to admit my real plans, I floundered for an itinerary packed full of exciting things to present him with. He jumped in before I had anything.
“Me, Kieran, and a few of the boys are going to a party that one of your rugby lot is throwing if you’re interested?” I looked up with a start.
“I didn’t know you were a student?” He laughed aloud, and my cheeks reddened automatically.
“Do we look like fucking students?” he replied, like the whole notion was ridiculous. I wisely said nothing, figuring that any answer I gave would only dig the hole I was in deeper. He stopped at the door to my apartment building and reached out to tug on one of my curls.
“Parties are the best place to pick up pretty little students, happy with a bit of rough for the night.”
“Don’t you need to be a student to go?” I asked, naively. After all, what did I know about college parties?
“Don’t sweat it, sunshine. Kieran and I know a few of the boys. They get us into parties, and we get them fight tickets. It’s all good. So, you coming or what?”
“Thank you for the invitation, but I don’t really do parties, either,” I replied softly.
“Can’t say I’m surprised, but you know where I’ll be if you change your mind,” he said, as he pulled on my curl again. I smiled but knew he was only being polite. Not for the first time I wished I were a different sort of girl, one who could let the man she was attracted to touch her without recoiling.
“Well, thank you for walking me home. Will you have far to get home yourself?” I asked.
“Fuck me. It’s Friday night. The only place I’m going is to get a few beers in me. You want me to walk you up?” he asked. Of course, he was going out. It was too much to hope that he’d be tucking himself up in bed, safe from the advances of bar sluts all too eager to wrap their legs around him for a night. Swallowing back the bitter taste of disappointment, I looked at the ground again.
“No, I’m fine here. Thanks again for walking me home.”
“You’re welcome. See you soon.”
He watched as I let myself into the door of the building, and once I was safely inside, I locked the handle and made it to the window just in time to see him walking off into the darkness. There was nothing about this man that made us right for each other, but I was deluding myself if I didn’t think I’d be counting down every minute of the next six days until I could see him again.
“EM. GOD GAVE YOU SKIN like that for a reason, and it wasn’t so you could cover it up with plaid flannel.”
I looked down at the fitted shirt I wore with a vest and leggings. It wasn’t what I was planning to wear to the party, but I loved this shirt. Nikki obviously didn’t share my fashion sense, or absence thereof, and her mention of showing skin worried me. God only knew what stripper outfit she’d bring out next. I was beginning to think that letting her talk me into going to this party was a bad idea. Her campaign this week had been subtle, but relentless. I finally caved when the lunch table cottoned on to our discussion. Unable to give them a good enough reason why I wasn’t going, they cajoled me into accepting. I promised myself that I’d stay just long enough that people would remember my appearance, but forget what time I left. Despite my reservations, I was secretly thrilled at the prospect of seeing O’Connell outside of work. Thursday and Friday night had been much the same as last week. O’Connell and Kieran stopped by for a chat, and it wasn’t long before Danny was shepherding them out of the office. With a cheeky grin and a wink every time I caught his eye, O’Connell was starting to get to me. Although I was still crap at making conversation as he walked me home, I hadn’t completely embarrassed myself yet. Of course, there was always tonight. Having never been to a student party, I had no idea what to wear. I needn’t have worried. As soon as Nikki could sense my resolve crumbling, she pounced and dragged me to her dorm to pick out an outfit. If she hadn’t, I would have agreed to go then taken one look at my miserable wardrobe and changed my mind again.