"No, I don't," she whispered. "Considering what happened to you there, I don't know how you can look at it with any kind of fondness."
"It's where my family was and where I grew up. Damian, our father and mother. Trust me, I need all the good memories I can keep," he said, a dark note in his voice.
"Do you still have those issues?" she asked curiously, rolling onto her side to face him. She propped her head up on her hand.
Darian was stretched out in the space beside her, hands beneath his head. For the first time since arriving at Jonny's, she wasn't cold. His warmth made her drowsy and comfortable, and she liked the feeling.
"The memories will never leave. Every day with Czerno …" He drifted off. "I need those good memories."
Jenn studied him, unable to fathom the type of evil he'd endured. That he was remotely normal now made her realize how strong he was. He seemed unaware of the world or his effect on it at times, but he'd not only survived the Black God, he'd regained his mind.
"You're an amazing person, Darian," she said. "I don't know how you did it."
"I had help. Couldn't even walk when Sofi first found me. I had to let go of my pride and realize I couldn't heal alone. That was probably the worst lesson for someone who was a White God. Thank goodness I was too brainwashed to know it."
"Sofi helped you, but you wouldn't have gotten far if you weren't as strong as you are."
"Strong or stubborn?" he mused. "I'm going with stubborn."
"I'm serious, Darian. I admire that about you. You lost everything in the worst way possible yet you don't let your past cripple you like it does … others," she managed.
"Some scars stay just below the surface. No one can see them but me."
"I'm sorry, Darian." She couldn't help hurting for him, all too sensitive to the scars left by her own past.
He rolled to face her, mirroring her position. While she welcomed his warmth, the space between them seemed to shrink. They gazed at each other.
"Don't be. You didn't do this to me," he said.
I've treated you like shit the past few days. She felt frustrated with herself, knowing what he'd gone through. But she wouldn't be the one to hurt him again, and he wasn't going to be the one to pry open the door to her heart. She'd work on burying her emotions again, this time deeper than before.