No man of common-sense will value a woman the less for not giving up

herself at the first attack, or for accepting his proposal without

inquiring into his person or character; on the contrary, he must think

her the weakest of all creatures in the world, as the rate of men now

goes. In short, he must have a very contemptible opinion of her

capacities, nay, every of her understanding, that, having but one case

of her life, shall call that life away at once, and make matrimony,

like death, be a leap in the dark.

I would fain have the conduct of my sex a little regulated in this

particular, which is the thing in which, of all the parts of life, I

think at this time we suffer most in; 'tis nothing but lack of courage,

the fear of not being married at all, and of that frightful state of

life called an old maid, of which I have a story to tell by itself.

This, I say, is the woman's snare; but would the ladies once but get

above that fear and manage rightly, they would more certainly avoid it

by standing their ground, in a case so absolutely necessary to their

felicity, that by exposing themselves as they do; and if they did not

marry so soon as they may do otherwise, they would make themselves

amends by marrying safer. She is always married too soon who gets a

bad husband, and she is never married too late who gets a good one; in

a word, there is no woman, deformity or lost reputation excepted, but

if she manages well, may be married safely one time or other; but if

she precipitates herself, it is ten thousand to one but she is undone.

But I come now to my own case, in which there was at this time no

little nicety. The circumstances I was in made the offer of a good

husband the most necessary thing in the world to me, but I found soon

that to be made cheap and easy was not the way. It soon began to be

found that the widow had no fortune, and to say this was to say all

that was ill of me, for I began to be dropped in all the discourses of

matrimony. Being well-bred, handsome, witty, modest, and agreeable;

all which I had allowed to my character--whether justly or no is not

the purpose--I say, all these would not do without the dross, which way

now become more valuable than virtue itself. In short, the widow, they

said, had no money.

I resolved, therefore, as to the state of my present circumstances,

that it was absolutely necessary to change my station, and make a new

appearance in some other place where I was not known, and even to pass

by another name if I found occasion.




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