“Your da always like this?” he asked as they left the house proper.
“He took it better than I expected,” Renna said, taking a broom and sweeping out one of the empty stalls. Outside, the sun had set, and there were shrieks and flashes of light as the corelings tested the wards. The animals were used to the sound, but still they shifted nervously, knowing instinctively what would happen if the wards failed.
“Lucik just lost his da,” Cobie said. “You’d think Harl would show a little heart.”
Renna shook her head. “Not my da. He don’t care about any needs but his own.” She bit her lip, remembering what things were like before Lucik came.
After Cobie was safely settled in the barn, Renna came back in to the house to find Lucik in the common room, explaining things to the boys. She slipped quietly by and went into Beni’s room, finding her sister folding clothes and packing her few belongings.
“Take me with you,” Renna said bluntly.
“What?” Beni asked, surprised.
“I don’t want to be alone with him,” Renna said. “I can’t.”
“Renna, what are you…” Beni began, but Renna grabbed her shoulders.
“Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about!” she snapped. “You know what he was like before Lucik came.”
Beni hissed and pulled away, going to the door and pushing it shut. “What do you know of it?” she asked, her voice a harsh whisper. “You were always the baby. You never had to endure—” She broke off, her face twisting with anger and shame.
Renna glanced pointedly at her bosom. “I’m not a baby anymore, Beni.”
“Then bind your breasts,” Beni said. “Stop running about in just your shift. Don’t give him a reason to notice you.”
“That won’t stop him, and you know it,” Renna said.
“Been almost fifteen years, Ren,” Beni said. “You don’t know what he’ll do.”
But Renna did know. In her heart, she had no doubt. She had seen her father looking at her, his eyes running over her like greedy hands. Why else did he react so jealously whenever a man glanced her way? More than one had come courting when she was younger. They knew better now.
“Please,” she begged, gripping Beni’s hands as tears filled her eyes. “Take me with you.”
“And what will I tell Lucik?” Beni snapped. “He feels bad enough, leaving the farm untended. Without you, Da ent never gonna be able to handle the load.”
“You could tell him the truth,” Renna said.
Beni slapped her. Renna fell back, clutching her cheek in shock. Her sister had never struck her in her life.
But Beni showed no sign of remorse. “You get that out of your head,” she growled. “I ent gonna make my family bear that shame. Lucik would turn me out if he knew, and before long the whole town would hear tell. And what of Ilain? Should Jeph and her children have to carry that stain, too, all ’cause of you being a baby?”
“I’m not being a baby!” Renna shouted.
“Keep your voice down!” Beni hissed.
Renna took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. “I’m not being a baby,” she said again, “just because I don’t want to be left alone with that monster.”
“He ent a demon, Renna, he’s our da,” Beni said. “He’s given us succor and put food on the table all our lives, even though his heart broke when Mam died. Ilain and I took it, and if it comes to that, you can, too.”
“Ilain took it by running to hide behind Jeph,” Renna said, “just like you hide behind Lucik. But who do I have to hide behind, Ben?”
“You can’t come with us, Renna,” Beni said again.
Just then, Lucik walked into the room. “Everything all right? I heard raised voices.”
“Everything’s fine,” Beni said, glaring at Renna, who sobbed and pushed past Lucik, running to her little curtained corner of the common.
Renna lay awake that night, listening to the shrieks of the corelings in the yard and the grunting from Beni’s room, her and Lucik at it like most every night. The same sound used to come from Harl’s room when her mother was alive. And after that, when Harl had made their eldest sister Ilain take her place. And when Ilain left, those sounds had come again on the nights when Harl pulled Beni in there. She hadn’t been so accepting of it then.
Renna sat up, bathed in sweat, her heart pounding. She peeked around the curtain and saw the boys fast asleep on their blankets. Clad only in her shift, she crept through the common and eased open the barn door, slipping quietly within.
Inside, she took the striker and lit a lantern, casting the barn in a flickering light.
“Eh?” Cobie asked, squinting and raising a hand over his eyes. “Whozzat?”
“It’s Renna,” she said, coming over and sitting beside him in the hay. The lantern light danced around the stall, flickering over Cobie’s broad chest as his blanket slipped down.
“Don’t get visitors often,” she said. “Thought we could sit and talk a spell.”
“Sounds nice,” Cobie said, rubbing the sleep from his face.
“Have to be quiet, though,” Renna said. “If Da catches us, there’ll be the Core to pay.”
Cobie nodded, flicking a nervous eye in the direction of the house door.
“What’s it like, being a Messenger?” Renna asked.
“Well, I ent a real Messenger,” Cobie admitted. “Ent licensed by the guild in the Free Cities, and don’t think I’d be fool enough to sleep outside with the demons even if I were. But workin’ for Mr. Hog beats fishin’. Always hated that.”
“Way I hear tell, you never did much of it,” Renna said.
Cobie laughed. “True enough. Used to just run and fool about with Gart and Willum, but they got promised and stopped having time for it. Can’t laugh out on the boats. Scares the fish.”
“How come you never got promised yourself?” Renna asked.
Cobie shrugged. “Da said it’s because girls’ fathers didn’t think I could settle and provide for a wife and young’uns. He was right, I guess. I was always more interested in hanging around the general store than working. Fished when I had to, but never had enough credits to pay for all the ale I drank. Your da was right that Mr. Hog started sending me to fetch this or deliver that just to balance the log. But when the Speaker started asking Mr. Hog to have me ferry messages around, too, he said I could stay in the little room behind the store to be on hand.
“People treat me with respect now,” Cobie said, “because I’m on town business. They give me meals, and succor when it’s too far to go back to Town Square before dark.”
“Bet it’s nice,” Renna said, “traveling all over the Brook and seeing everyone all the time. I never see anyone.”
Cobie nodded. “I earn more than I drink, now, and when I have enough credits, I’m going to buy a horse of my own, and change my name to Cobie Messenger. Maybe build a house in Town Square, and have sons to take on the job when I’m old.”
“So you think you could settle and provide now?” Renna asked. Cobie wasn’t handsome, but he was a good strong man with prospects. She was coming to realize Arlen might never come back for her, and life had to go on.