“Fix you?” Jasper said. “He should kill you.”
“Maybe,” Call said. “But he definitely doesn’t deserve to die for it.”
“Okay, so what do you want, Call?” Aaron asked.
“The same things I wanted before!” Call shouted. “I want to get the Alkahest and give it back to the Collegium. I want to save my father. I don’t want to have any more awful secrets!”
“But you don’t want to defeat the Enemy of Death,” said Jasper.
“I am the Enemy of Death!” Call yelled. “We have already defeated the Enemy! I’m on your side.”
“Really?” Jasper shook his head. “So if I said I wanted to leave, would you tell the Chaos-ridden to stop me?”
Call hesitated for a long moment, with Tamara and Aaron watching him. Finally, Call said, “Yeah, I’d stop you.”
“That’s what I thought.”
“We’re too close to the end,” Call tried to explain. “Too close to my dad. He still has the Alkahest. He’s still going to give it to Master Joseph. And Master Joseph won’t use it to kill me; he wants me alive. He’ll kill my dad, he’ll kill Aaron, then who knows what he’ll do after that. We have to finish.”
He stared at them, willing them to understand. After a long, long moment, Tamara gave a tiny nod. “So, what next?” she asked.
Call turned to the Chaos-ridden. “Take us to Master Joseph,” Call commanded. “Escort us there, don’t hurt any of us, and do not tell him we’re coming.”
The Chaos-ridden began to move, flanking Call. Aaron, Tamara, and Jasper were being moved along, herded, surrounded. They walked in a narrow path surrounded by corpse-like bodies; it reminded Call of biblical paintings of the Red Sea parting. There was nowhere to go but in the direction the Chaos-ridden went and no pace to walk but the pace they set.
They marched through the dark forest in dead silence, the crackle of pine needles underfoot. Havoc marched along happily, at home with others of his kind. With every step, Call felt a terrible loneliness overtake him. After this, there would be no return to the Magisterium. There would be no more friends; no more lessons from Master Rufus; no more meals of lichen in the Refectory or games with Celia in the Gallery.
At least Havoc would come with him, although Call wasn’t sure where they’d go.
They walked for what felt like a long time, long enough for Call’s leg to ache intensely. He could feel himself slowing down, could feel the majority of the Chaos-ridden slow to keep pace with him.
So, basically, he was setting the pace.
Aaron stepped to his side. “You were going to be my counterweight,” he said, and only when he said it in the past tense did Call realize with a sinking heart how much he’d wanted to do it.
“I didn’t know,” he said. “When I offered.”
“I don’t want to have to fight you,” Aaron went on. Jasper and Tamara were walking up ahead, Tamara speaking urgently to Jasper. “I don’t want to, but that’s what’s going to happen, isn’t it? That’s our destiny: to kill each other.”
“You don’t really believe I want to kill you, do you?” Call said. “If I wanted to kill you, I could have. I could have killed you in your sleep. I could have killed you a million times over. I could have chopped your head right off!”
“That’s convincing,” Aaron muttered. “Tamara!”
She dropped back to walk with them. Jasper continued to stalk ahead, a few Chaos-ridden alongside him.
“Why did you say what you said back there?” Aaron asked. “That you believed Call.”