Chapter 43

The Fifth Army

Sato had finally asked all the people from Mothball’s Reality to sit down, cross-legged, so he could actually see them as he spoke. Even then, the tops of their heads came to the middle of his chest, which made it all the more absurd that he was suddenly their leader. But there they were, rows of soldiers sitting on the checkered marble-like stone of this bizarre place, all eyes upon him.

After a long break, he’d reassembled the group. He had no clue how long it’d be before Tick—or whoever—winked them away. Or even if it was really going to happen.

No, he believed it. Tick’s voice had been alive in that note, as had the urgency he felt. Something big was about to happen, and Sato had to get these people ready to help with it.

“You gonna stand there all day or talk to us?” said Rutger, sitting in the front row, just a few feet from Sato.

“Hold on! I’m thinking. If you wanna get up here and lead this army yourself, then do it!”

Instead of being taken aback, Rutger nodded, as if in approval. As if he were proud of his own son standing up here. This annoyed Sato greatly.

Next to Rutger were the Higginbottoms—Mom and Dad, Lisa and Kayla—the four of them having not separated an inch since being reunited. Of all the things that worried Sato about what was coming up, Tick’s family was Number One. They obviously couldn’t fight—not with Kayla to care for. They protested, of course, when Sato had pointed that out earlier, but even then it was halfhearted. Their first priority had to be keeping Kayla safe, and going to off to battle wasn’t the best way to do that. But Sato didn’t know what else to do with them.

He realized he was staring at the family; Mr. Higgin-bottom tentatively waved at him. Sato shook his head slightly and tried to save himself by smiling. Okay, he thought, I have to get on with this.

He returned his attention to the waiting rows of Fifths. “I guess it’s time for my big motivational speech. We could be winked away from here at any second to the Thirteenth Reality, where very dangerous stuff is going to happen. I hope you’re all a little more aware of things like winking and other worlds by now—I know Mothball and her family have been around talking to you all about it. Well, none of that matters much. All we need to care about is that we’re going to a bad place, and we need to save some good people and a lot of children.”

He was relieved to hear a low rumble of positive responses—“Yeah,” and “Let’s get ’em,” and “Ruddy ready, we are”—along with vigorous nods and shaking of fists. These really were a warrior people—Sato would never doubt it again. How the Bugaboos had lasted this long against them, he had no idea. Of course, they came from the same stock, he supposed . . .

“We’ve got no weapons!” someone shouted from the back, breaking into his thoughts. Then another person called out, “Don’t even know who we’re ruddy fighting! Or what!”

Instinct told Sato what he needed to say in response. If their confidence was going to be solidified, it needed to come from within. “Good questions! So, are you saying we should give up? Not even try? Throw in the towel?”

A chorus of angry denials thundered through the vast space, a deafening roar backed by red faces and pumping fists. Some even stood, looking as if they might charge Sato and wallop him for even suggesting such a thing.

“No, I didn’t think so!” he yelled as loud as he possibly could. The Fifths quieted. “We’ll fight with our hands and our feet, with sticks and stones! We’ll fight with our elbows and knees! Whatever it takes!”

A shocked silence greeted this last part. Mothball finally said from her spot, “A bit much, but I like your spirit, I do.” A few chuckles rose from the crowd.

Sato would have none of it. “I don’t care if it’s a bit much. If you guys wanna take this as a joke and treat me like a little kid, then fine! But we don’t have weapons, so we have to be willing to do terrible things to stop the terrible things we’re about to see! Are you willing or not?”

Impossibly, the chorus that greeted him was even stronger than before, piercing his eardrums with a needle of sharp pain. The roar went on and on, and this time every single Fifth stood up, arms raised to the sky, shouting and screaming. Sato let it go on, looking around with a stoic face, accepting their display of devotion.

When it started to die down naturally, he lit into them again. “When this is over, when we’ve gone to the Thirteenth and rescued our friends, when we’ve destroyed this unnatural and evil factory of creatures, we won’t stop. We’ll go back to your world, we’ll gather more people—the greatest army the world has ever seen—and we’ll wipe the Bugaboos from existence!”

More shouts, more cheers. Sato kept going, trying with all his might to increase the volume of his already strained voice.

“We are the Fifth Army! Say it with me! The Fifth Army!”

He raised a fist to the sky and screamed the words, ripping his throat to pieces. “The Fifth Army! The Fifth Army! The Fifth Army!” His soldiers shouted the words along with him, a sound so loud it seemed to shake the strange floor upon which they stood.

Sato stopped, knowing he’d need his voice in the hours to come. The others didn’t quit, however, and kept chanting as if they never planned to stop.

Rutger stepped to Sato’s side. “Nice work. Now what?”

“Now we wait for the call,” Sato said. “It’s coming, and when it does, we’ll be ready.”

Lisa watched the pep rally with mixed feelings—a whole barrage of them.

Her parents sat to either side of her, Kayla in her lap, the four present members of the Higginbottom clan clasped in an awkward but wonderful hug. Despite having everything in their world turned upside down, Lisa felt safe at the moment. But deep down she knew the feeling was fleeting, and there were a thousand and one things to worry about.

Sato’s speech had really shocked her. He’d seemed quiet for one thing, and then to suddenly stand in front of this crowd of human giants and speak so loudly and convincingly was quite a thing to see. She thought his speech was a little bit on the cheesy side with a few roll-the-eye moments, but that’s what you needed for something like this. Overall, very impressive.

But still.

What could they do? What could a few hundred people—even tall, gangly, gimme-some-blood warrior giants—do against this psycho lady Mistress Jane? And more importantly—personally, selfishly—what was going to happen to Lisa and her family? They couldn’t go to this Thirteenth Reality place and fight. The idea was ridiculous. She almost laughed at the picture of herself running around like a chimpanzee trying to jump on bad guys and, what—bite their ears?




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