“What was it like?” Marasi suddenly asked. “Lord Ladrian? Living where there was no law?” She seemed genuinely curious, though her comment earned a glare from Lord Harms, likely for bringing up Waxillium’s past.
“It was difficult sometimes,” Waxillium admitted. “Out there, some people just believe they can take what they want. It would actually surprise them when someone stood up to them. As if I were some spoiler, the only one who didn’t understand the game they were all playing.”
“Game?” Lord Harms said, frowning.
“A figure of speech, Lord Harms,” Waxillium said. “You see, they all seemed to think that if you were skilled or well armed, you could take whatever you want. I was both, and yet instead of taking, I stopped them. They found it baffling.”
“It was very brave of you,” Marasi said.
He shrugged. “It wasn’t bravery, honestly. I just kind of fell into things.”
“Even stopping the Surefires?”
“They were a special case. I—” He froze. “How did you know about that?”
“Reports trickle in,” Marasi said, blushing. “From the Roughs. Most of them get written up by someone. You can find them at the university or at the right bookshop.”
“Oh.” Uncomfortable, he picked up his cup and drank some wine.
As he did, something slipped into his mouth. He nearly spat out the entire mouthful in surprise. He contained himself. Barely.
Wayne, I really am going to throttle you. He moved the object into his hand, covering the act with a cough.
“Well,” Steris said, “hopefully the constables will soon deal with these ruffians and we can return to peace and law.”
“Actually,” Marasi said, “I don’t think that’s likely.”
“Child,” Lord Harms said sternly. “That’s quite enough.”
“I’d like to hear what she has to say, my lord,” Waxillium said. “For the sake of conversation.”
“Well … all right … I suppose.”
“It’s simply a theory I had,” Marasi said, blushing. “Lord Ladrian, when you were lawkeeper in Weathering, what was the population of the city?”
He fingered the item in his hand. A spent bullet casing that had been capped with a dab of wax. “Well, it started to grow rapidly in the last few years. But for most of the time, I’d say it was around fifteen hundred.”
“And the surrounding area?” she asked. “All the places you’d patrol, but didn’t have their own lawkeepers?”
“Maybe three thousand total,” Waxillium said. “Depending. There are a lot of transients out in the Roughs. People looking to find a mineral claim or to start up a farmstead. Workers moving from place to place.”
“Let’s say three thousand,” Marasi said. “And how many of you were there? Those who helped you keep the law?”
“Five or six, depending,” he said. “Wayne and I, and Barl most of the time. A few others on and off.”
And Lessie, he thought.
“Let’s say six per three thousand,” she said. “Gives us an easy number to work with. One lawman per five hundred people.”
“What is the point of this?” Lord Harms asked sufferingly.
“The population of our octant is around six hundred thousand,” she explained. “By the same ratio Lord Ladrian described, we should have roughly twelve hundred constables. But we don’t. It’s somewhere closer to six hundred, last I looked over the numbers. So, Lord Ladrian, your ‘savage’ wildlands actually had double the number of lawmen watching over it as we have here in the city.”
“Huh,” he said. Odd information for a young woman of means to have.
“I’m not trying to diminish your accomplishments,” she said quickly. “You more likely had a higher percentage of lawbreakers as well, since the reputation of the Roughs draws that type. But I think it’s a matter of perception. As you said, out of the city, people expect to get away with their crimes.
“Here, they are more circumspect—and many of the crimes are smaller in scope. Instead of the bank getting robbed, you get a dozen people being robbed on their way home at night. The nature of the urban environment makes it easier to hide if you keep your crimes below a certain level of visibility. But I wouldn’t say life is really safer in the city, despite what people think.
“I’ll bet more people are murdered here, by percentage of the population, than out in the Roughs. There is so much more going on in the City, however, that people pay less attention to it. By contrast, when a man is murdered in a small town, it’s a very disruptive event—even if it’s the only murder that’s happened in years.
“And all of this isn’t even counting the fact that much of the wealth in the world is concentrated in a few places inside the city. Wealth draws men looking for opportunity. There are a whole host of reasons why the City is more dangerous than the Roughs. It’s just that we pretend that it isn’t.”
Waxillium folded his arms in front of him on the table. Curious. Once she started talking, she didn’t seem shy at all.
“You see, my lord,” Harms said. “This is why I tried to still her.”
“It would have been a shame if you had,” Waxillium said, “as I believe that’s the most interesting thing anyone has said to me since I returned to Elendel.”
Marasi smiled, though Steris just rolled her eyes. Wayne returned with the soup. Unfortunately, the area right around them was crowded—Wayne wouldn’t be able to create a speed bubble around just Waxillium and himself. It would catch someone else, and anyone caught in it would have time sped up for them as well. Wayne couldn’t shape the bubble or choose whom it affected.
While the others were distracted by the soup, Waxillium broke the wax off the sealed shell casing and found a small rolled-up piece of paper inside. He glanced at Wayne, then unrolled it.
You were right, it read.
“I usually am,” he muttered as Wayne placed a bowl in front of him. “What are you up to, Wayne?”
“One seventy, thank you,” Wayne said under his breath. “I’ve been lifting weights and eating steak.”
Waxillium gave him a flat stare, but got ignored as Wayne proceeded to explain—with his slight Terris accent—that he’d soon return with a bread basket and more wine for the group.
“Lord Ladrian,” Steris said as they began eating, “I suggest that we begin compiling a list of conversational topics we can employ when in the company of others. The topics should not touch on politics or religion, yet should be memorable and give us opportunities to appear charming. Do you know any particularly witty sayings or stories that can be our starting point?”
“I once shot the tail off a dog by mistake,” Waxillium said idly. “It’s kind of a funny story.”
“Shooting dogs is hardly appropriate dinner conversation,” Steris said.
“I know. Particularly since I was aiming for its balls.”
Marasi just about spat her soup across the table.
“Lord Ladrian!” Steris exclaimed, though her father seemed amused.
“I thought you said I couldn’t shock you any longer,” he said to Steris. “I was merely testing your hypothesis, my dear.”
“Honestly. You will eventually overcome this rural lack of decorum, won’t you?”
He stirred his soup to make sure Wayne hadn’t hidden anything in it. I hope he at least washed that bullet casing. “I suspect that I will, indeed, eventually overcome it,” he said, raising the spoon to his lips. The soup was good, but too cold. “The amusing thing is that when I was in the Roughs, I was considered to be highly refined—so much so, in fact, that they thought me haughty.”
“Calling a man ‘refined’ by Roughs standards,” Lord Harms said, raising a finger, “is like saying a brick is ‘soft’ by building-material standards—right before you smash it into a man’s face.”
“Father!” Steris said. She glared at Waxillium, as if the comment were his fault.
“It was a perfectly legitimate simile,” Lord Harms said.
“We will have no further talk of hitting people with bricks or of shootings, regardless of the target!”
“Very well, cousin,” Marasi said. “Lord Ladrian, I once heard that you threw a man’s own knife at him and hit him right through the eye. Is the story true?”
“It was actually Wayne’s knife,” Waxillium said. He hesitated. “And the eye was an accident. I was aiming for the balls that time too.”
“Lord Ladrian!” Steris said, nearly livid.
“I know. That’s quite off target. I’ve got really bad aim with throwing knives.”
Steris looked at them, growing red as she saw that her father was snickering, but trying to cover it up with his napkin. Marasi met her gaze with innocent equanimity. “No bricks,” Marasi said, “and no guns. I was making conversation as you requested.”
Steris stood. “I’m going to see myself to the women’s washroom while you three compose yourselves.”
She stalked away, and Waxillium felt a stab of guilt. Steris was stiff, but she seemed earnest and honest. She did not deserve mockery. It was very hard not to try provoking her, however.
Lord Harms cleared his throat. “That was uncalled for, child,” he said to Marasi. “You must not make me regret my promise to start bringing you to these functions.”
“Don’t blame her, my lord,” Waxillium said. “I was the primary offender. I’ll offer a suitable apology to Steris when she returns, and will guard my tongue for the rest of the evening. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to go so far.”
Harms nodded, sighing. “I’ll admit, I’ve been tempted to such lengths myself a time or two. She’s much as her mother was.” He gave Waxillium a pitying look.
“I see.”
“This is our lot, son,” Lord Harms said, standing. “To be lord of a house requires certain sacrifices. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I see Lord Alernath over at the bar and I think I’ll grab a nip of something harder with him before the main course. If I don’t go before Steris gets back, she’ll bully me into staying. I shouldn’t be long.” He nodded to the two of them, then waddled toward a group of higher-built tables off to the side, next to an open bar.
Waxillium watched him go, idly thinking and rolling Wayne’s note in his fingers. Previously, he’d assumed Lord Harms had driven Steris to be as she was, but it appeared he was more under her thumb than vice versa. Another curiosity, he thought.
“Thank you for your defense of me, Lord Ladrian,” Marasi said. “It appears that you are as quick to come to a lady’s aid with words as you are with pistols.”
“I was merely stating the truth as I saw it, my lady.”
“Tell me. Did you really shoot off a dog’s tail when aiming for his … er…”
