“Are you there?” he asked after a few seconds. Gabby couldn’t contain her visceral reaction to his deep voice in her ear. Her entire body went boneless, and her heart skipped a beat.
“Yeah.”
“What the hell are you pissed at me for? I came by to grab a beer. Nothing more.”
She knew she was being a bitch. She simply could not get that picture out of her head. Was this what she’d be reduced to? Watching the baby at home every night while he went out to grab a beer and collect phone numbers and come-ons? “You don’t make a habit of f**king your clients, do you? Or strange girls you take home from the bar?”
“What the— No, Gabby, I do not. I’m no saint, but I haven’t been with anyone since I moved here except you. Where is this coming from?”
She sighed. “I don’t know. Apparently, insanity is another pregnancy symptom. I kept thinking about that girl making a pass at you when I came in to tell you about the baby, and… I’m sorry.”
“I don’t give a shit about any other girls.”
“Glad to hear it.” She chuckled sadly.
“Are you okay? Where are you?”
“I’m in Florida, actually.”
There was a long silence during which she heard some raucous conversation going on in the background—probably some bar patrons leaving for the night. “What in the hell are you doing in Florida?”
“Parents’ condo. A girls’ weekend thing. I’ll be back in a couple of days.”
“Gabby…you’re f**kin’ worrying me, you know?”
For some reason, hearing that from him of all people, made something inside her snap. “Well, stop f**king worrying! I’m pregnant. Millions of women have gotten pregnant without losing their minds. I’m sure I’ll be one of them. The odds are in my favor.”
“You know, I’m starting to get the feeling you texted me just to start shit with me.”
“I texted you, Ian, because I miss you.” And with that admission, she almost wanted to slap her hand over her mouth. She would have if the action could possibly cram those foolish words back in.
“Then what did you run off to Florida for?”
“To see if I missed you. Maybe. That wasn’t really the reason, but it’s been a good experiment.”
“Who are you with?”
“My sister-in-law.”
“Does she know?”
“Yes. She’s the only person I’ve told.”
“I miss you too, baby.”
Her breath left her in a rush. Sweetness rushed through her veins, and all that mushy crap she’d never thought she would ever care about feeling. Clinical. That was how she liked her life to be. She liked everything neat and tidy and in a nice little box. Ian Rhodes had come into her life, torn open the box and strewn the contents around the room. She couldn’t even begin to pick them up and put them back where they belonged. They would no longer fit. She’d outgrown the box. “You haven’t exactly been beating down my door,” she said, her voice small.
“You haven’t exactly acted like you wanted me to.”
She wanted to tell him to beat it down. Beat it with all his might, beat it down until she broke and confessed everything she was trying to keep locked away from him. “I don’t know what to do,” she said at last.
“Day by day,” he reminded her.
“What if days turn into weeks and then into months, and I still don’t know?”
“Then maybe I will.”
Shit, she couldn’t do this anymore. Couldn’t lie here in the dark with the distant sound of the waves and listen to his voice. The yearning for him was like a physical ache. “I’ll see you when I get back.”
“All right,” he said, a note of dejection in his tone. “You sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah.”
“Gabby…” She waited for his next words, her entire being on hold during that torturous pause that seemed to be filled with more than words could say right now. Finally, he sighed. “Good night.”
And he was gone. Loneliness crept in. She rolled over and let her hand trail down to her belly as her eyes leaked silent tears onto her pillow. “No matter what, I’ll always have you, huh?” Her little peanut.
Boy or girl? What would she name him or her? Would he have her eyes? Or would she have Ian’s smile? If it was a boy and he looked too much like his father, that would be the worst form of torment…unless she could see his father every day of her life.
Gabby had gone to bed early enough that surely Kelsey would still be awake, but she didn’t want to bother her with more of her emotional, hormonal bullshit. Bad enough that she’d bothered Ian and proven what a psycho she was becoming.
She would lie low for a while. Most likely, even though Kelsey had vowed to tell on her, she’d head back to Dallas before she told her parents or anyone else about her pregnancy. Then she could deal with them from afar. That wasn’t so difficult. Maybe dealing with Ian from afar was the best answer too. After time, the ache would fade. The memory of him wouldn’t be so acute that she sucked in a breath when she recalled his touch.
“Keep doing what you’re doing.”
It was unthinkable, but maybe it was the only answer.
Chapter Fourteen
She didn’t know if coming to that decision could actually be considered progress, but it felt like it. Somewhat. Gabby slept much of the way home as Kelsey drove, compensating for the little sleep she’d gotten the entire time they were at the condo. She’d wanted to offer her own driving services, but she probably would’ve gotten them in an accident.
Many long hours later, Kelsey steered into the Rosses’ driveway, and Gabby sighed at the sight of the ostentatious house coming into view. Kelsey apparently found meaning in that sound as she braked in the circular drive and killed the engine. “You have to tell them. Soon.”
“I will.” After I’m gone. “Sorry to be such a downer on this trip. We’ll have to go back again once the craziness settles down.”
“You weren’t a downer. And we’ll definitely go back again, but if we wait for the craziness to stop, it’ll never happen.”
Wasn’t that the truth?
Kelsey was staying an extra night with her in-laws before she made the drive back to Austin in the morning, so Gabby enjoyed one more night with her, although it was under her parents’ noses. They loved Kelsey to pieces, so they hogged most of her time. Gabby managed to get up early enough the next morning to see her sister-in-law off, then went back to bed as the nausea began to work its evil magic on her. Thankfully, it had been giving her a bit of a reprieve, but not today. Her parents must’ve thought she stayed out partying the entire time she was in Destin, because she slept until early afternoon.
Waking up, she felt…better. Usually upon first opening her eyes, dread hit her hard right in the chest like a sledgehammer. For one blissful moment, she wouldn’t remember everything that was happening to her, and then…boom. Instant terror and OhmyGod, ohmyGod, what am I going to do? Today, though… Maybe the getaway had done her some good after all. She’d gotten some sun, some salty sea air—she actually felt pretty competent at dealing with life now.