Everywhere I looked was love alongside brokenness.
I was so tense when I got home that I decided to go for another jog to shake it off. Februaries in Georgia were always chilly, but it was brutal this year. My fingers, ears, and nose were freezing. Definitely not helping with the stress and tension factor. I turned for home just as flurries started falling.
We didn’t get much snow. Hardly any, actually. So when we did, it filled me with an almost childish feeling of excitement. I stopped jogging and walked home, grinning stupidly at the falling white flakes, holding out my icicle fingers to catch them.
I was so lost in the beauty of nature that I thought I’d imagined it when I heard a lovely, low, accented voice call my name. I stopped in front of my apartment building, still grinning, and turned. Then held my breath and let the grin fall from my face.
On the other side of the lot, standing next to a black car with the driver’s door open, was Kaidan. We stared without moving or speaking. I didn’t feel cold anymore.
He had on a knitted gray cap and his hair adorably stuck out of the edges and curled upward. His eyes were locked on mine, and even through the falling snow their blueness shone like a beacon to my heart. But I didn’t move toward him. The way he stood there with his hand on the door and a guarded expression—not angry or happy, just cautious—he reminded me of a wild animal. As if I’d stumbled into the path of a majestic stag in the woods. Any false move or sound could startle him away.
“Hi,” I whispered.
“Hi, yourself,” he said quietly.
This was really happening. I swallowed, and my chest shook a little when I breathed.
“I hate Valentine’s Day,” I told him.
The corners of his mouth hinted at a sad grin. “Yeah, it’s shite.”
I grinned a little, too. “Is everything okay?” I asked, wondering for the first time why he was here.
It took him a moment to answer, as our greedy eyes soaked each other in. “I just needed to see that you’re well. And it seems you are.” He gripped the door and I saw it move an inch, which caused a mild flurry of panic in my chest.
Don’t go, yet. Please don’t go.
I stepped to the edge of the sidewalk, still afraid that if I got too close, he’d vanish. But I needed to get close. I needed to tell him about the prophecy and that I’d always love him, even if he continued to deny me forever.
Seeing those eyes made me wonder how I could have ever thought he meant what he said to Kope. Or how I could have thought I could so easily move on. One glimpse at him and I was his all over again. A stab of guilt pained me when I thought about that closet in Australia.
I was halfway across the street, eyelashes fluttering away snowflakes. He was pushing past the door to come to me.
This is all I’d wanted. For him to come to me. Even for a moment. It didn’t matter that I probably looked like a mess from my frozen run, or that he’d spent the last year, and even longer, pushing me away. What mattered was that he was here now. And we could finally fix it all. I could see in his warm eyes that’s what he wanted, too.
And then the most awful, ugly sight dotted the far sky. We both noticed at once and halted. Two whisperers. They weren’t flying low—it seemed they were just passing over on their way somewhere else, but still. We couldn’t take the chance of being seen together.
Kaidan murmured something sharp, stepping back.
Icy fear filled me as I instinctually backed between the parked cars and toward the stairs, my eyes still on Kaidan. His eyes hit mine one last time, his jaw tight.
“Don’t try to follow me. I’m on my way to the airport.”
I nodded and he slid into the car like a shadow. The sleek vehicle pulled away as I shot up the stairs and into my apartment, tremors shaking my frozen body.
Patti was on me in an instant. “Are you okay? Did you see Kaidan? He was here!”
I let her lead me to the couch. The apartment felt so hot compared to outside. My eyes skidded around the walls, expecting whisperers to come flying in at us, but they didn’t. I caught a glimpse of myself in the wall mirror and saw a sheet of light snow melting in my hair. Patti put her warm hands on my cheeks.
“You’re freezing.”
I grabbed her hands and looked at her. “I saw him, but we didn’t get to talk because some stupid demons were flying over . . . and . . .”
I wanted to cry. I needed to cry. My eyes and throat burned, but I couldn’t get the tears to come. Instead, all I could do was gulp tiny gasps of air. Patti’s wide eyes went to the door.
“Did they see you two?”
I shook my head and she pulled me into a hug and rubbed my back. “Shh, it’s okay, sweet girl. You got to see each other. And that’s a blessing, right? Let’s just say I gave him a hug big enough for the both of us.”
I squeezed her harder, so glad she’d been able to pour some love into him on this stupid day of hearts and flowers, even if just for a minute.
“You better get ready for your self-defense class,” she murmured into my hair.
“I don’t want to go.”
“Your daddy will have a conniption if you miss your class. Maybe it’ll help you get your mind off everything.”
I sniffed, doubtful. “Maybe.”
It didn’t help get my mind off anything. Being there, grappling with my instructor and having my face smashed into the mat for the third time in ten minutes, only reminded me why I had to learn to fight in the first place.