Time seemed to stand still as the gruff timbre of Axel’s hoarse voice cut through the sadness of the room. As one, we all leapt forward. Axel and Levi ran to one side of his bed, and I the other.
Stroking my hand across Axel’s forehead, I watched him struggle to swallow and open his eyes. A tear from my eye splashed on his cheek, right on his crucifix tattoo. I used my thumb to brush it away.
As I ran the damp pad of my thumb along his jaw line, I felt that delicious sensation of a pair of Italian dark eyes watching me. Inhaling a fortifying breath, I blinked and glanced up to meet those beautiful eyes full on.
Top lip twitching into a hooked smirk, Axel opened his split lips and rasped, “Carina…” with a relieved sigh.
The endearment sounded like an answered prayer to my soul as it met my ears. Sniffing back my emotions, I gave him a watery smile, “Welcome back, querido…”
“What… What?” he tried to ask. I shushed him and shook my head.
“Everything’s okay, you’re okay.” I looked up at Austin and Levi standing anxiously on the other side of the bed. And reassured, “We’re all okay.”
Axel slowly followed my gaze, bringing him to Austin and Levi. “Fratelli…” he said quietly, slowly lifting up his hand.
Austin was the first to reach for Axel’s hand, his head lowering until his forehead touched their clasped fingers. “Axel… I’m so fucking sorry…”
“Vai bene,” Axel replied. He next looked at Levi. “Lev…” he said with feeling. I could see Axel’s eyes shining with unshed tears. He loved that kid to death.
Levi slumped to a chair like his legs could no longer take his weight, then his head hit the mattress, back shaking with the force of his tears. “I’m sorry, Axe… I’m so sorry…” he cried. Austin released Axel’s hand. Axel laid it on Levi’s head.
Levi looked up as he did so and wrapped it in both of his hands. “We should have trusted you.”
Axel closed his eyes then opened them a second later. “Ain’t ever… given… you much of a reason… to trust me in your lives… I… get it.”
Austin shook his head. “You’ve only ever protected us, Axe… I get that now…” Austin wiped his eyes with the heels of his hands and asked, “those sculptures, Axe… why didn’t you tell us…?”“Shame…” he replied in embarrassment, “I didn’t deserve it…” His head rolled on the pillow to me, his eyes wordlessly telling me how much he loved me, “none of this. I’ve been… unfairly blessed.”
Feeling my heart swell, I leaned down and kissed his lips. “You’re wrong.”
“I’m a sinner,” Axel said. I could hear how much he believed that statement. I could see it in his honest expression.
“No,” I soothed, “A sinner is a man who doesn’t recognize his wrongs. You have, querido, you’ve recognized them and done everything in your power to fix them… you’re not a sinner. You’re redeemed.”
“She’s right, Axe,” Levi said and his breath caught, “Mamma… she would be so proud of you.”
“Lev,” Axel whispered. Austin sat beside Levi, adding his hand on top of theirs. “I’m so proud of you… I have pride that you’re my blood.”
Those words seemed to resonate with Axel, they meant something to the two of them and tears escaped Axel’s eyes. The sight of the three Carillo's together was my undoing.
After minutes of the Carillo boys mending fences, Levi suddenly said, “Only good things for us from this point on, yeah?”
Axel exhaled and I could see the pride for Levi’s show of strength glittering in his dark eyes.
Levi looked up and met the eyes of both Austin and Axel. “Swear it.”
Austin wrapped an arm around Levi’s shoulder, pressing a kiss to his head and said, “Lo giuro.”
They both then looked to Axel. Axel smiled through his swollen cut lips, a full genuine smile that I’d not seen him display before and he whispered. “Lo giuro.”
*****
Several hours passed as the three of us kept vigil by Axel’s bedside. He was tired, slipping in and out of sleep, but we stayed. The three brothers talked about Axel’s time in prison, Austin unable to believe that Axel hadn’t told him how he’d suffered. But they managed to move past it. Levi spoke of his fears of losing them both, but admitted he had bottled up his feelings for far too long, wrongly blaming Axel for all his pain.