“Who was it?” The panic in her voice frightened me. She gripped the edge of the plastic table as if to steady herself.

“I-I don’t really know him,” I stammered, “but I talked to him last night a little.”

“Stay away from him!” She pointed at me for emphasis and stared with giant eyes.

The phone rang inside the apartment as we watched each other. It rang again.

“Get the phone,” she said. “I need to think.”

I jumped up and ran in, answering on the third ring.

“Hello?”

“Hey,” said a weak and scratchy voice.

“Jay? You sound terrible!” I sat down at the kitchen table and glanced out at Patti. She was sitting with her eyes closed, still holding the table’s edge, her posture rigid.

“I feel terrible,” he said. “How much do you hate me?”

“Don’t be crazy, Jay. I was just worried about you. Are you sick?”

“I feel like I got hit by a Mack truck. I don’t remember everything, but what I do remember makes me feel like a jackass.”

“We were lucky Jana helped,” I said.

“Hmph. I paid for that one. She had me up at seven o’clock making her breakfast before she had to go to work. And I’m not talking about a bowl of cereal. I’m talking eggs and bacon and everything! I couldn’t even stand up straight.”

I held in a laugh as I imagined it.

“What do you remember?” I asked.

“I got mad at you ’cause I thought you were high, so I started chugging a bottle of gin. Ugh. I can’t even think about it or I’ll get sick. Then everyone was coming up to me and asking if I heard about Scott slipping you a drug, and I just lost it. I only remember pieces after that, mostly me tearing through the place trying to find him. Pretty sure I knocked a few people over. Aw, man, I can’t friggin’ believe I got so wasted.”

“Is that all you remember?”

“Yeah. Why? What else did I do?” I looked over and saw Patti standing now, looking out at the trees with her arms across her chest. I kept my voice low.

“There was a minor occurrence involving you, Scott, and a window.”

“Oh, no. Are you serious? Is everyone okay? Did the window break?”

“Yes, it broke, but everyone’s okay. Scott had some cuts and his nose was possibly broken, but I think you mostly hurt his ego. Don’t your knuckles hurt?”

“Everything hurts. Aw, man. There go my summer savings. I need to call Gene and get that window fixed before his folks get back. But was it even true about the drugs? You definitely weren’t acting right when I saw you.”

I paused. Yet another moment when I would’ve preferred to lie. “There was Ecstasy in my drink, and I was feeling it when you saw me, but the full effects didn’t stay with me, for whatever reason.”

He let out a long, angry sound like a rumble.

“Listen, Jay. I want you to let it rest for now. Please. Thank you for sticking up for me, but I don’t want you to go after him. I’ll deal with it myself when the time is right. ’Kay?”

“Fine,” he grumbled to placate me. It hadn’t sounded believable.

“Thanks,” I said anyway.

“Hey, wait a minute,” he said. “What the heck was up with you and Kaidan? I was looking for you when I first heard the rumor, but someone said you left with him.”

My tummy wobbled and I looked toward Patti again. She was seriously lost in thought. I whispered now.

“Nothing was up with us. We were talking on the dock. He remembered me.”

“Talking about what? I can barely hear you. Is Patti next to you or something?”

“Yeah, sorry. I don’t know. We talked about drugs, and our parents. Trying to have a conversation with him is really difficult.”

“You two are polar opposites, but it might be good for you. You could use a little fun.”

“Oh, please!” I said, forgetting to be quiet for that one second. “It’s not like that. I can’t explain it.”

“Do you like him?” he asked.

“I’m... intrigued by him,” I confessed.

“All right, all right.” He sounded happy. “That’s a start.”

A start of what, I didn’t know, but I wanted to find out.

CHAPTER SEVEN

IDENTITY

Patti was acting so weird that I shut myself in my bedroom with my book. I would read a few sentences, then think about last night, then read more, then wonder what was up with Patti.

She was not usually a hoverer, but for more than an hour she paced back and forth past my bedroom door.

“Are you okay?” I finally called out to her.

She came in looking sheepish, a nervous gray around her. She sat on the edge of my bed. I crossed my legs to give her room and my full attention.

“Anna.” She cleared her throat. Her eyes were full of moisture and ringed in red. “The day I picked you up from the orphanage—no, let me go back further. This is all going to sound so strange.”

She knew something about me! I grabbed her forearm, greedy for information.

“My whole life has been strange, Patti. If you know something, please tell me. There’s nothing you can say that will scare me, or—”

She let out a huff through her nose and shook her head. “Everything that I’m going to tell you will scare you. Honey, I’ve been scared for sixteen years.”




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