That he only stoop to a semi-evil Fallen status? That his mind only become half-polluted? That he only carry out the occasional terrible demands?
This was the worst thing he could have done! He had to know that!
And it was incredibly stupid.
The door opened and Nate and Serena walked in. Serena’s hair naturally flamed bright orange. Her head looked like she was on fire, it was so bright and shining. And golden skin radiated Light constantly because she was always fighting, or flying. She wasn’t meant for Earth and had never learned how to be human. Only here temporarily, she was the epitome of the constant reminder of the Warrior’s life I would never lead- the one off planet and where most of my compatriots were.
Nate was the quintessential Warrior. While Stars were as different as night and day, with our array of hair and eye colors, our height differences and body shape variables, Warriors seemed to fit into the same mold with varying degrees of gorgeous. Their skin color was always a rich, golden tan, their hair the same naturally highlighted deep brown and bodies muscled to the max and well fit for fighting. The eye color and facial features changed from Warrior to Warrior, but all of them looked like they could be brothers, my dad and Nate included.
“We’ve seen him,” Nate announced. He walked over to the sink and immediately filled a glass of water for Serena and him.
“He’s with them,” Serena explained, taking the glass and draining it. Clearly they had flown directly here and landed just outside the house. They were out of breath and a bit windblown. And they were covered head to toe in leather- leather pants, leather jackets, and thick leather boots. I hadn’t climbed on the bad-ass bandwagon yet, preferring to fight and fly in my yoga pants and t-shirts. But they rocked this look with their otherworldliness. “We found them in London. Seth was with Aliah, Seven and a few more Fallen that we recognized.”
“What were they doing in London?” I demanded. The words fell from my lips before I could stop them, even though it felt like hearing the answer would kill me.
Serena shared a look with Nate and then turned her bright blue eyes back to me, “It looked like they were celebrating.”
“Celebrating?” I choked.
“Stella,” Nate started in his authoritative, rumbling voice and I knew he was about to confirm our deepest fears. “Seth is Fallen. Serena, we…. it was confirmed. He is Fallen.”
The words echoed around my head like marbles in empty space. They just kept rolling and rolling, bouncing off my skull, but never settling. I didn’t- couldn’t- wouldn’t understand this.
“It’s not possible,” I insisted.
The room was silent in answer. There was no response to my complaint, because everyone else had accepted what I wanted to believe was a lie. He wouldn’t have done that to me.
He wouldn’t.
A knock on the back door drew all of our attention. In unison we looked up and stared at it, like it was its own life form. Slowly my dad stood up and walked over through the mudroom to find out who it was.
When he returned into the main part of the kitchen, relief sagged his shoulders and he half turned to me, “Stella, it’s your friends.”
Piper. In all the craziness, I forgot she promised to come over.
“Oh, right.” I stood up, feeling like I had to push against the weight of the world to get to my feet. “I’ll go outside with them.”
I reached the door, feeling a building excitement to get out of this house and away from these people. I needed to be around my friends- the ones that wouldn’t abandon me, the ones that had nothing to do with the ugly side of my life.
“Stella,” my dad called out to me. “Whatever his thinking, or reason for doing what he did, he cares about you, Sweetheart. I believe he did what he did out of concern for you, not because he truly defected.”
My shoulders dropped and I felt the treachery of tears prick my eyes. “But it doesn’t matter, does it? He still did it. He’s still Fallen. No matter why he did it, or for whom he did it. The outcome is the same.”
Nobody had anything to say to that, so I opened the door and walked outside. Away from the ringing disappointment that Seth had just ceased to be a part of my life.
Forever.
Chapter Eight
“Hey,” Piper smiled at me. “You really do look like hell. I’m sorry I ever doubted your close call with death.”
I tried to smile back but it fell flat. I was a mess, teetering on the edge of losing it completely and holding it together for just five more minutes. A tear snuck out the corner of my eye and trailed slowly down my cheek. I didn’t even have the energy to wipe it away.
“Stella, are you alright?” Tristan stepped forward and held my arms in his strong grasp. “Do you really feel this terrible?”
I shook my head and slipped off the precarious edge I was barely holding onto. Tears tracked down my face now, in streams of messy ugliness. “Seth is gone,” I whispered.
My friends heard me and immediately converged on me. Tristan pulled me into a hug, even though I knew it kind of killed him to console me over Seth. And Piper wrapped both of her arms around one of mine and laid her head on my shoulder.
“What do you mean, he’s gone?” she asked in a gentle voice, but hearing the words repeated back to me felt like razor blades against my heart, no matter how softly they were spoken.
“He left,” I sobbed. “He left me.”
“Where did he go?” Piper pressed, sounding a little hysterical with her confusion.
Tristan held me closer, absorbing my racking pain into his own body. His hand tangled through my hair and then stroked the length of it. I buried my face deeper in his chest and let him hold me. There was no reason to feel guilty anymore. No more voice in my head told me to pull back from Tristan because Seth could catch us like this. What was the point? Seth was gone. I was free to do whatever I wanted.
My heart split open at that thought and I cried harder. I didn’t want to give up on Seth. But now I felt more confused than ever.