“I need Maddie,” I spat out. Then seeing her face in my head, seeing her smiling, I lowered my knife to my side and added, “She’s in my head all the time.” I looked up at AK, and confessed, “I slept. With her beside me, I can sleep with no demons in my head. And she sings to me. To me. No one’s ever sang to me before.”
AK dropped his head and hushed out, “Fuck, brother.”
“I need her.” I tapped my head. “In here, I need her.” Then I bounced my fist over my heart. “And here. I feel her in here too.”
AK’s shoulders rose and fell, then he said, “You didn’t cut yourself at the table. You always fucking cut yourself at the table.”
I stared at him, not saying shit, and he nodded his head. “The little one, right?”
My eyes fell to my arm dripping with blood and I swallowed. “She calms them. With her, they don’t burn. I sleep, they’re calm… I can’t be without her.”
“Fuck,” AK said again and clicked his fingers to make me look up. “You listen to me, Flame. You fucking listened to me when you were a scrawny lost seventeen year old kid, and I need you to listen to me now. You fucking lose it, you come find me. You freak the fuck out again, like you did on the Chechen drop off, and you find me. The little one fucking wants to be around you when most bitches would be running a fucking mile in the other direction. That’s a fucking big deal for you both. You don’t have to be a fucking genius to work that shit out. And I don’t want you to hurt her, or you, again. Because if you hurt her, Styx will kick your ass out of this MC, and we both know you need us. You won’t do so well outside on your own. So we have a deal?”
I heard his words. I knew I couldn’t hurt Maddie, but I agreed anyway.
AK blew out a breath. “I hated seeing you that far gone, brother. I ain’t got any idea what set you off, and I’m pretty fucking sure you ain’t gonna share, but it’s damn good to have you back.” He smiled and said, “Need you back in the trio. Viking’s a fucking nightmare on his own.”
“Someone say my name?” Turning to the door, on cue, we saw Viking coming through zipping up his leathers.
“Mention the devil and he’ll fucking appear,” AK muttered as Viking threw his arm around AK’s shoulder. AK looked at the hand lying on his shoulder and said, “That hand better not have fucking just touched your grass snake.”
Viking pulled his hand away and punched AK on his arm. “It’s a fucking anaconda, and you know it.”
AK flicked his chin, ignoring Viking. “We okay, Flame?”
Gripping my knife tighter in my hand, I could feel skin twitching. I needed Maddie. I needed her right the fuck now.
“Flame? We good?” AK repeated.
“We’re good,” I replied, then turned and left the room.
Passing through the club, I never looked at the brothers prepping to go on drop off. Instead, I burst out of the back exit and hit the dirt road that led to Styx’s cabin.
Quickening into a run, I cut through the trees to where Maddie had last been. Mae and Lilah were sitting on chairs: no Maddie.
My eyes searched the clearing but Maddie wasn’t anywhere in sight.
“Where’s Maddie?” I asked.
“She has gone to wait for you at your cabin,” Lilah said.
I backed away and broke through the line of trees. I ran until my cabin came into view. I pushed the door open, my eyes immediately finding Maddie at the only seat I owned, next to the large living room window.
She was drawing again. She’d changed clothes. This time wearing a sleeveless white dress. And her long black hair was tied back.
As I entered through the door, her head snapped up. She jumped, and her green eyes were wide, until she whispered my name, “Flame…” and her body lost tension.
My muscles tensed when her cheeks turned pink.
Maddie shut the sketchpad and put her pencil on the windowsill. She then got up from the chair and walked toward me. She smelled of strawberries. Something she’d washed with smelled of strawberries.
“You’re here,” I confirmed. Maddie looked up at me and smiled.
My pulse kicked into overdrive at her smile.
“I wanted to be here when you came home.” She pointed to the kitchen with her finger. “I have made you food for this evening. I will not be here to make it for you and I wanted to be sure you ate.”
My body froze. “Where are you going?”
Maddie’s smile dropped, and she replied, “Lilah and Mae are taking Sarai to church. I am to go with them.”