School was strange when I first went back. I'd spent months outside the system, first in the asylum, then in the mansion with Dervish. It took me a while to find my feet. For the first couple of terms I didn't really speak to anybody except Bill-E and the school counsellor, Mr. Mauch, better known as Misery Mauch because of his long face. I'd always been popular at my old school, lots of friends, active in several sports teams, Mr. Cool.
All that changed at Carcery Vale. I was shy, unsure of myself, reluctant to get involved in conversations or commit to after-school events. On top of the hell I'd been through, there was Dervish to consider. He needed me at home. I became an anonymous kid, one who spent a lot of time by himself or with a similarly awkward friend (step forward Bill-E Spleen).
Things are different now. I've come out of my shell a bit. I'm more like the old me, not quiet in class or afraid to speak to other kids. I've always been bigger than most people my age. In the old days I was a show off and used my bulk to command respect. At the Vale I kept my head bent, shoulders hunched, trying to suck my frame in to make myself seem smaller.
Not any more. I'm no longer Mr. Flash, but I'm not hiding now. I don't feel that I have to.
I've made new friends. Charlie Rail, Robbie McCarthy, Mary Hayes. And Loch Gossel. Loch's big, not as massive as me, but closer to my size than anybody else. He wrestles a lot-real wrestling, not the showbiz stuff you see on TV. He's been trying to get me to join his team since I started school. I resisted for a long time, but now I'm thinking of giving it a go.
Loch also has a younger sister, Reni. She's pretty cute, even if she does have a nose that would put Gonzo to shame! I stare at her a lot and sometimes she makes eyes back. I think she'd go out with me if I asked. I haven't. Not yet. But soon... maybe... if I can work up the nerve.
The end of a typical school day. Yawning through classes, desperate for lunch-time so I could hang out with my friends and chat about movies, music, TV, computer games, whatever. Bill-E joined us for some of it. I don't spend as much time with Bill-E as I used to. He doesn't fit in with my new friends-they think he's geekish. They don't slag him off when I'm around, but I know they do when I'm not. I feel bad about that and try to help Bill-E relax so they can see his real side. But he gets nervous around the others, acts differently, becomes the butt of their jokes.
Thinking about Bill-E as I walk home. I don't want us to stop being friends. He's my brother and he was really good to me when I first moved here. But it's difficult because I don't want to lose my new friends either. Guess I'll just have to work harder to make him feel like part of the group. Try and be like one of those TV kids who always solve their problems by the end of each show.
Dervish is sitting on the stairs when I let myself in. I'm dripping wet-it's been pouring for the last couple of hours. Normally, when the weather's bad, he picks me up on his motorbike. When there was no sign of him today, I figured his mood hadn't improved since breakfast. I was right. He's as blank as he was this morning, staring off into space, not registering me until I'm right in front of him.
"Dervish! Hey, Derveeshio! Earth to Dervish! Are you reading me, captain?"
He blinks, frowns as if he doesn't know who I am, then smiles. "Grubbs. You're alive. I thought..." His expression clears. "Sorry. I was miles away."
I sit beside him. "Bad day?"
"Can't remember," he replies. "Why are you home early?" I hold up my watch and tap it. Dervish reads the time and sighs. "I'm losing it, Grubbs."
My insides tighten, but I don't let Dervish see my fear. "Losing what-your sanity? You can't lose what you never had."
"My grip." Dervish looks down at his feet, bare and dirty.
"I wasn't like this before. I wasn't this distracted and empty. Was I?" He looks at me pleadingly.
"You've been through hell, Derv," I tell him quietly. "You can't expect to recover without a few hiccups."
"I know. But I wasn't this way, right? Some days I can't remember. I feel like it's always been like this."
"No," I say firmly. "It's just a phase. It'll pass."
"All things must pass," Dervish mutters. Then he looks at me sideways, his cool blue eyes coming into focus. "Why are you wet?"
"Took a bath. Forgot to strip." I rap his forehead with my knuckles, then point to the windows and the rain battering the panes. "Numbnuts."
"Oh," Dervish says. "I should have picked you up."
"No worries." I rise and stretch, dripping steadily. "I'm going up to shower and change into dry clothes. I'll stick this lot in to wash. Anything you want me to add?" I did all the jobs around the house when Dervish was a vegetable. Hard to break the habit.
"No, I don't think so. I..." Dervish stares at his left hand. There's a black mark on it, a small 'd'. "There was something I meant to tell you. What...?" He clicks his fingers. "I had a phone call, a follow-up to some e-mails I've been getting recently. Ever heard of someone called Davida Haym?"
"No, can't say..." I pause. "Hold on. Not David A. Haym, the movie producer?"
"That's her."
"I thought that was a guy."
"Nope. She uses David A. on her movies, but it's Davida. You know about her?"
"Sure. She makes horror movies. Zombie Zest. Witches Weird. Night Mayors-that's, like, Nightmares, only two words. It's about evil mayors who band together to set up a meat production plant, except the meat they process is human flesh."
"Win many Oscars?" Dervish asks.
"Swept the board," I chuckle. "I can't believe she's a woman. I always thought... But what about her? I didn't think you were into horror flicks."
"She phoned me earlier."
I do a double-take. "David A. Haym called you?"
"Davida Haym. Yes." Dervish squints at me. "Have I grown a second head?"
"Hell, it's David A. Haym, Dervish! That's like saying Steven Spielberg was on the line, or George Lucas. OK, not as big as those, but still..."
"I didn't know she was famous," Dervish says. "She told me the names of some of her movies, but I don't watch a lot of films. She made it sound like she was a cult director."
"She is. She doesn't make films with big-name stars. But her movies are great! Anyone who loves horror knows about David A. Haym. Though I'm not sure many know she's a woman."
"That's a big sticking point for you, isn't it?" Dervish grins. "You're not turning into a chauvinist, are you?"
"No, I just..." I shake my head. Water flies from my ginger hair and splatters the wall. "What did she want?"
"She's making a new movie. Asked if she could meet me. She'd heard I know a lot about the occult. Wants to pick my brain." He tweaks his chin, forgetting the beard isn't there. "I hope she didn't mean that literally."
"Did you say yes?" I ask, excited.
"Said I'd think about it."
"Dervish! You've got to! It's David A. Haym! Did she say she'd come here? Can I meet her? Do you think-"
"Easy, tiger," Dervish laughs. "We didn't discuss where we'd meet. But you think I should agree to it?"
"Absolutely!"
"Then meet we shall," Dervish says, getting to his feet and heading up to his office. "Anything to please Master Grady."
I tramp up the stairs after him, pulling off my clothes, thinking about how cool it would be if I could meet David A. Haym... and also how weird it is that one of the world's premier horror producers is a woman.
"David A. Haym's a woman? No bloody way!" Loch howls.
"You're having us on!" Robbie challenges me.
"How stupid do you think we are?" Charlie huffs.
"Of course she's a woman," Mary says. We gawp at her. "You didn't know?"
"No," Loch says. "You did?"
"Yes."
"How long?"
Mary shrugs. "I dunno. Years."
"And you never told us?" Robbie barks.
"It never came up," Mary laughs. "I've no interest in horror movies. I always tune out when you guys start on that rubbish."
"Then how did you know she's a woman?" I ask.
"There was a feature on her in a magazine my mum reads," Mary explains. "I think the headline was, 'The horror producer chick who beats the boys at their own game'."
They're nearly as excited as I am. Most of my friends don't know what to make of Dervish. In a way he's cool, the adult who rides a motorbike, dresses in denim, lets me do pretty much what I like. On the other hand he sometimes comes across as a complete nutter. Plus they know he was a veg for more than a year.
But now that he's in talks with the slickest, sickest producer of recent horror movies, his cred rises like a helium balloon. They want to know how she knows about him, when she's coming, what the new movie's about. I act mysterious and secretive, giving nothing away, but dropping hints that I'm fully clued-in. In truth, I know no more than they do. Dervish wasn't able to get through to her last night. He left a message and was waiting for her to phone back when I left this morning.