As the talk of their European vacations swirled around him, Jake contributed absent-mindedly while fuming inwardly. Rainie hadn’t smiled all week. Even the clients noticed. Mrs. Flanders had scolded him and ordered him to fix whatever was bothering her.

Difficult to do. Damn him for being an idiot and getting involved.

“…Jake?” Jennifer lifted her eyebrows.

Everyone waited for his answer.

“I missed that,” he said. “What did you ask?”

“I ran into Nadia, and she said you two were dating. When did that happen?”

“Who’s Nadia?” Saxon scowled. “Is this why Rainie hasn’t laughed for three days? You might have mentioned you broke up.”

Fuck was the only word that came to mind. He ignored Sax to frown at his sister. “Since when does having a post-party drink mean I’m dating someone?”

“Who is Rainie?” his mother asked.

No, fuck wasn’t enough. Clusterfuck was more like it.

His mother didn’t rule her children’s lives, but she was an advocate of staying informed. “Jake?”

No help for it. “Remember Lynette, the receptionist Sax’s uncle recommended? She screwed up the office so badly I fired her. Rainie has been helping out.” He gave Saxon a flat stare. “However, Z’s mother, Madeline Grayson, offered Rainie a position in New York, and she’s moving soon. I’ll call in an ad to fill the receptionist spot tomorrow.” He should have acted sooner but hadn’t been able to face the task.

“Well, that sucks.” Saxon scowled. “I wanted her to stay.” He glanced at Jake’s father. “She had Lynette’s mess straightened out within a day, took on the staff schedules and the payroll, as well. She’s been researching more efficient software. And she keeps notes on what’s required to expand into an emergency hospital.”

“And you call her a receptionist?” Jake’s father laid his napkin beside his plate and leaned back.

“She just completed her MBA,” Jake said. “Her last job was managing a towing company. Since the owner hated business, she kept on taking on new projects. She’s enthusiastic that way.” Not so enthusiastic about relationships.

But he couldn’t escape the memories… Rainie surrounded by puppies. Coaxing a homesick cat out of the sulks. Dancing with heart and soul. Kneeling before him. Laughing with him.

His chest squeezed painfully. He’d miss the joy she brought to everything she did.

Now get over it.

“Someone who thrives on multitasking is the perfect office manager for your clinic. If she likes that, she’ll probably find a large company a tad stifling,” Jake’s father said.

Quite true. She didn’t seem to care though.

As his mother poured decaffeinated coffee, his sister served the dessert.

“Interesting name.” Jennifer set a piece of key lime pie on Jake’s plate and said, “I knew a Rainie once. A girl in my class who dropped out. She ran away from her foster home, which made me unhappy because I wanted to get to know her.”

Jake stiffened. Rainie’d been in foster care. “Sounds like our”—my—”Rainie. Why’d she run away?” And why hadn’t she mentioned the running away part?

“I’m not sure. I heard some nasty rumors about the foster home she lived in. The man—” Jennifer grimaced. “Well, there are always rumors. Like after that, Mandy said Rainie was staying with a drug dealer.”

Mouth tight, Jake’s dad tapped his fingers on the table. “How old were you at the time?”

“Um. I was studying for my driver’s license,” Jennifer said.

Jake pushed his pie away, appetite gone. Then Rainie’d been sixteen…and living with a dealer? His softhearted woman who cried over old dogs and their owners?

“So, big brother,” Jennifer said, trying to lighten the table conversation. “Were you dating this paragon of efficiency?”

“Obviously not seriously or she wouldn’t be moving to New York.” He winced at the bitterness in his voice. With a forced smile, he added, “Which is as well. Her priorities differ from mine.”

“Oh.” Jennifer’s gaze flickered over his face, and then she bit her lip and turned her attention to her pie.

“Well…” His mother’s expression held sympathy. She’d always been able to read him like a book. “How is Nadia doing with her job?”

“Fine,” Jake said. “She’s an excellent choice for Renard. One good snob deserves another.” At his mother’s choked-off laugh, he smiled slightly, remembering when he’d thought Nadia exemplified the ultimate in womanly perfection. But young men grow up and learn to cherish the beauty hidden beneath the surface.

Rainie was beautiful inside and out.

Ignoring the conversation around him, he toyed with his pie and thought about Heather, his prior girlfriend. They’d been good together, and she’d been an easy person to love. He’d missed her cheerful company, but…but not with this profound ache, as if he’d accidentally sliced a hole in his chest.

When he heard Rainie’s voice in the clinic, his body warmed, not with lust, but just…happiness. Seeing her with puppies, he felt like gifting her with a half dozen simply to keep that smile on her face. Always, he wanted to sit next to her and share in her joy.

But her glow had been missing since the wedding. He’d done that—or she had.

She was unhappy; he was unhappy. Couldn’t she figure this out? Why wouldn’t she talk with him, dammit?

The plate and pie he was playing with disappeared, and he looked up with a scowl.

Sax gave him a smile. He forked up a big bite of the half-smashed pie and popped it in his mouth. “Sorry, bro, but if you’re not going to enjoy something tasty, you’re going to lose it.”

Chapter Twelve

Late the next night in a restaurant’s private dining room, Jake sat back in his chair and listened to the other Masters and Mistresses talking. The various conversations were drawing to a close. The monthly Shadowlands M&M dinner was almost over.

As the waitress set a beer in front of him, Jake smiled at her. “Thank you.”

She gave him a timid nod. Poor woman. While taking their orders, she’d actually been shaking. But Z had eased her fears, Cullen had teased her, Marcus had paid her one of his silver-tongued compliments. Even Nolan had found a smile for her.

She’d relaxed slightly…probably as much as possible when faced with all the firepower of the Shadowlands, let alone the conversational material. The argument they’d had about blood-play would disturb anyone but a sadist.

“Any more concerns?” Z asked from the head of the table.

“A small one.” Anne turned to Jake. “I heard Rainie is moving?”

He nodded.

“So we’re down to two trainees?”

“Less,” Jake said. “Tanner told me he’s joining the Colton household. Only Uzuri is left.”

“That’s a shame about Rainie.” Marcus frowned. His face was deeply tanned from his honeymoon. As he gestured, the wide gold band on his hand flashed in the dimly lit room. Gabi had told Jake she’d picked a ring so “ginormous,” every woman in Florida would see he was taken. “I’m going to miss the girl, and so will Gabi.”

And so will I. The Shadowlands wouldn’t be the same. Rainie had added a special flash of brightness and color to the club. And to his life.

He caught Z’s gaze on him and stiffened. Much as he respected the owner of the Shadowlands, Jake didn’t need his counseling.

“In that case, meeting adjourned.” Z got to his feet.

Jake rose with the others and after the general round of farewells, he took his beer to the bar to finish. Wasn’t as if anyone waited at home for him—except for a small dog and two cats. Pitiful, Sheffield. After all, his “black book”—the cell phone’s contact list—was filled with numbers to call if he wanted female companionship.

He didn’t.

“Hey, buddy, you’re still here?” Cullen’s voice boomed over the noise of the television and nearby conversations. He slid onto a barstool beside Jake. Probably a month or so past due for a haircut, he had to brush his brown hair out of his eyes.

His dark red, button-up shirt fit him well—except for some rather suspicious bulkiness under the left sleeve. Gauze bandages, perhaps? Cullen was an arson investigator—not the safest of career choices.

Jake nodded at Cullen’s arm. “What got you?”

“Falling beam. Got a bit scorched before I knocked it aside.” Cullen caught the bartender’s attention and pointed to the Guinness on tap. “Beer’s a hell of a lot easier—and tastier—to swallow than pain pills.”

Jake studied him. Cullen was probably well over two hundred pounds, but that wasn’t his first beer. “How about I drive you home when you’re done self-medicating?”

Cullen drank past the foam to the dark brown liquid and heaved a pleased sigh. “No need. Andrea’s out with friends. When I told her I wanted to overindulge, she volunteered to pick me up.”

“Good enough.” Jake turned his attention back to his beer.




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