Parker hit the mat with a grunt and I shouted, thrilled with my own success.
"Yes," I said with a fist pump.
Learning to toss a guy as heavy as Parker was no small feat.
Finding the right balance to gain the leverage I needed had taken me longer than it probably should have because I'd had such a hard time concentrating over the last couple of weeks.
There was no balance in my life when my relationship with Gideon was skewed.
Laughing, Parker reached out to me for a hand up.
I gripped his forearm and tugged him to his feet.
"Good.
Very good," he praised.
"You're firing on all cylinders tonight."
"Thanks.
Wanna try it again?" "Take a ten-minute break and hydrate," he said.
"I need to talk to Jeremy before he takes off."
Jeremy was one of Parker's co- instructors, a giant of a man that the students had to work their way up to.
Right then, I couldn't imagine ever being able to fend off an assailant of his size, but I'd seen some really petite women in the class do it.
I grabbed my towel and my water and headed toward the aluminum bleachers lined up against the wall.
My steps faltered when I saw one of the detectives who'd come to my apartment.
Detective Shelley Graves wasn't dressed for work, though.
She wore a sports top and matching pants with athletic shoes, and her dark, curly hair was pulled back in a ponytail.
Since she was just entering the building and the door happened to be next to the bleachers, I found myself walking toward her.
I forced myself to look nonchalant when I felt anything but."Miss Tramell," she greeted me.
"Fancy running into you here.
Have you been working with Parker long?" "About a month.
It's good to see you, Detective."
"No, it's not."
Her mouth twisted wryly.
"At least you don't think so.
Yet.
Maybe you still won't when we're done chatting."
I frowned, confused by that tangle of words.
Still, one thing was clear.
"I can't speak to you without my attorney present."
She spread her arms wide.
"I'm off- duty.
But anyway, you don't have to say anything.
I'll do all the talking."
Graves gestured toward the bleachers, and I reluctantly took a seat.
I had damn good reason to be wary.
"How about we move a little higher?" She climbed to the top, and I stood and followed.
Once we were settled, she set her forearms on her knees and looked at the students below.
"It's different here at night.
I usually catch the day sessions.
I told myself that on the off chance I happened to run into you off- duty someday, I'd talk to you.
I figured the chances of that were nil.
And lo and behold, here you are.
It must be a sign."
I wasn't buying the additional explanation.
"You don't strike me as the type to believe in signs."
"You've got me there, but I'll make an exception in this case."
Her lips pursed for a moment, as if she were thinking hard about something.
Then she looked at me.
"I think your boyfriend killed Nathan Barker."
I stiffened, my breath catching audibly.
"I'll never be able to prove it," she said grimly.
"He's too smart.
Too thorough.
The whole thing was precisely premeditated.
The moment Gideon Cross came to the decision to kill Nathan Barker, he had his ducks in a row."
I couldn't decide if I should stay or go - what the ramifications would be of either decision.
And in that moment of indecisiveness, she kept talking.
"I believe it started the Monday after your roommate was attacked.
When we searched the hotel room where Barker's body was discovered, we found photos.
A lot of photos of you, but the ones I'm talking about were of your roommate."
"Cary?" "If I were to present this to the ADA for an arrest warrant, I would say that Nathan Barker attacked Cary Taylor as a way to intimidate and threaten Gideon Cross.
My guess is that Cross wasn't conceding to Barker's blackmail demands."
My hands twisted in my towel.
I couldn't stand the thought of Cary suffering what he had because of me.
Graves looked at me, her gaze sharp and flat.
Cop's eyes.
My dad had them, too.
"At that point, I think Cross perceived you to be in mortal danger.
And you know what? He was right.
I've seen the evidence we collected from Barker's room - photos, detailed notes of your daily schedule, news clippings .
even some of your garbage.
Usually when we find that sort of thing, it's too late."
"Nathan was watching me?" Just the thought sent a violent shiver through me.
"He was stalking you.
The blackmail demands he made on your stepfather and Cross were just an escalation of that.
I think Cross was getting too close to you, and Barker felt threatened by your relationship.
I think he hoped Cross would step away if he knew about your past."
I held the towel to my mouth, in case I became as sick as I felt.
"So here's how I think it went down."
Graves tapped her fingertips together, her attention seemingly on the strenuous drills below.
"Cross cut you off, started seeing an old flame.
That served two purposes - it made Barker relax, and it wiped out Cross's motive.
Why would he kill a man over a woman he'd dumped? He set that up pretty well - he didn't tell you.
You strengthened the lie with your honest reactions."
Her foot started tapping along with her fingers, her slim body radiating restless energy.
"Cross doesn't hire out the job.
That would be stupid.
He doesn't want the money trail or a hit man who could rat him out.
Besides, this is personal.
You're personal.
He wants the threat gone without a doubt.
He sets up a last-minute party at one of his properties for some vodka company of his.
Now he's got a rock-solid alibi.
Even the press is there to snap pictures.
And he knows precisely where you are and that your alibi is rock-solid, too."
My fingers clenched in the towel.
My God .
The sounds of bodies hitting the mat, the hum of instructions being given, and the triumphant shouts of students all faded into a steady buzzing in my ears.
There was a flurry of activity happening right in front of me and my brain couldn't process it.
I had a sense of retreating down an endless tunnel, my reality shrinking to a tiny black point.
Opening her bottle of water, Graves drank deeply, then wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.
"I'll admit, the party tripped me up a bit.
How do you break an alibi like that? I had to go back to the hotel three times before I learned there was a fire in the kitchen that night.
Nothing major, but the entire hotel was evacuated for close to an hour.
All the guests were milling on the sidewalk.
Cross was in and out of the hotel doing whatever an owner would do under those circumstances.
I talked to a half dozen employees who saw him or talked to him around then, but none of them could pinpoint times for me.
All agreed it was chaotic.
Who could keep track of one guy in that mess?" I felt myself shaking my head, as if she'd been directing the question at me.She rolled her shoulders back.
"I timed the walk from the service entrance - where Cross was seen talking to the FDNY - to Barker's hotel a couple blocks over.
Fifteen minutes each way.
Barker was taken out by a single stab wound to the chest.
Right in the heart.
Would've taken no more than a minute.
No defensive wounds and he was found just inside the door.
My guess? He opened the door to Cross and it was over before he could blink.
And get this .
That hotel is owned by a subsidiary of Cross Industries.
And the security cameras in the building just happened to be down for an upgrade that's been in the works for several months."
"Coincidence," I said hoarsely.
My heart was pounding.
In a distant part of my brain, I registered that there were a dozen people just a few feet away, going about their lives without a clue that another human being in the room was dealing with a catastrophic event.
"Sure.
Why not?" Graves shrugged, but her eyes gave her away.
She knew.
She couldn't prove it, but she knew.
"So here's the thing: I could keep digging and spending time on this case while there are others on my desk.
But what's the point? Cross isn't a danger to the public.
My partner will tell you it's never okay to take the law into your own hands.
And for the most part, I'm on the same page.
But Nathan Barker was going to kill you.
Maybe not next week.
Maybe not next year.
But someday."
She stood and brushed off her pants, picked up her water and towel, and ignored the fact that I was sobbing uncontrollably.
Gideon .
I pressed the towel to my face, overwhelmed.
"I burned my notes," she went on.
"My partner agrees we've hit a dead end.
No one gives a shit that Nathan Barker isn't breathing our air anymore.
Even his father told me he considered his son dead years ago."
I looked up at her, blinked to clear the haze of tears from my eyes.
"I don't know what to say."
"You broke up with him on the Saturday after we interrupted your dinner, didn't you?" She nodded when I did.
"He was in the station then, giving a statement.
He stepped out of the room, but I could see him through the window in the door.
The only time I've seen pain like that is when I'm notifying next of kin.