I couldn’t stand it. My stomach convulsed but no vomit came up my throat. There was nothing there, just pain. My muscles were squeezing in my thighs and back, pulling so tight they were snapping, trying to break from my skin. My saliva boiled in my throat. I couldn’t scream, couldn’t make a sound.
I lay on the floor, eyes watching the black walls as pictures and strange faces passed through my mind.
I couldn’t remember if even I knew them, Did I know them?
Then a face stabbed at my brain. My body jerked. Master. Where is Master?
Darkness came and went. I tried to scream as knives stabbed right through my stomach and came out the other side. My body shook as each blade sliced through, but I couldn’t move. I was too hot, too hot, but then I was too cold, too cold inside. My blood turned to ice, trying to push through my veins. My muscles froze, I was trapped on the floor.
My eyes suddenly closed, darkness pulling me down.
“Tie him to the table,” the man’s voice said, and someone threw me on a metal bed and strapped me down.
What are they doing? I was scared, so scared. I managed to turn my head, looking for help.
Then I saw him on a bed beside me. The boy’s brown eyes looked at me, and he mouthed, “Dzlieri. Be strong. Keep strong.” His fingers reached out trying to touch mine, and I did the same, but they didn’t meet. “Dzlieri, be strong, keep strong,” he mouthed again. I nodded my head as a man approached my table.
He ran his hands over my body, then the boy’s. “Identical in every way but their eyes.” He smiled. “They’ll be perfect.”
Two men held me down, then flipped me on my back. My head was forced down to the bed. I couldn’t move.
Fear ran through me and I could feel my hands shaking. But as I lifted my eyes, the boy was in the same position as me, two men in white coats holding him down. His head was facing mine. His eyes met mine and he silently told me to be strong, keep strong. And I did. I didn’t even scream when a long thick needle was pushed into my spine, when we were cut open, when we were beaten. Neither did the boy. We held each other’s gazes and never broke away.
A voice snapped me round. Voices—no, a single voice, the same voice that I heard every day. He was speaking in a strange language. Did I know what he was saying?
“Turn round and fight it,” he said. My eyes squeezed shut when I understood him. I couldn’t turn, couldn’t turn round. I wanted to growl, turn and cause him pain, but my muscles were weak, aching. I couldn’t keep my eyes open.
I was floating, my breathing slow, air was dragging into my lungs. Everything was still. I waited for Master. But no Master came.My cheek was flat to the ground, my eyes were shut. But I was numb. My heart beat at a steady pace. It didn’t race or stutter. There was no pain, no fire inside.
But I was too tired. I couldn’t move, my blood was no longer hot. The knives were no longer in my stomach. There was nothing.
I lay for a long time until the sound of a door creaking open caused me to still.
Quiet footsteps approached. The scent of something sweet filled my nostrils, and for the first time in a long time, my body wanted to move.
My eyes stayed closed, my back to the approaching person. My hands clenched into fists and I waited, teeth gritted for them to get close enough. They had me chained. But were they Master or the guards? The sound of their footsteps, I couldn’t recognize.
I waited and waited until the person kneeled behind me, their breath shaking with fear. I hated fear. Someone told me once that fear made you weak.
Readying to strike, a hand suddenly pressed against my back and I fought back a hiss at the contact. Not reacting, the hand ran down over my arm and along my waist. It was soft, and I frowned. I didn’t understand. Had Master sent a female to me? Was this a test?
Anger about my confusion pierced my brain.
It was a test, had to be a test.
I had to kill.… Master always wanted me to kill.…
As the hand ran across my back, warm breath drifting over my skin, I snapped.
Jerking from my position lying down, I roared, rolled around, and reaching out, grabbed the attacker’s arms and crashed them to the ground, my body braced above them to strike.
My blood pumped with the need to kill and just as I raised my hand to smash into the face of my attacker, not even feeling the heavy chains around my hands, I glanced down.
And froze.
Huge brown eyes stared up at me, too wide and afraid. The strange female’s mouth was open, big pink lips trembling as her eyes moved to my fist in the air. My nostrils flared at her smell … my heartbeat thundered and my muscles twitched.