“Hey, snowflake,” he called out. I turned back around and leaned into the car window. I was starting to like my nickname, although I’d never admit it to him.

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry about your mom. I’m an asshole, but even I wouldn’t wish that kind of pain on someone.” He looked uncomfortable with his confession.

I nodded my understanding and stepped away from the car. I stood there as he drove off. His car stood out in the upscale neighborhood. It wasn’t often a car with a mismatched hood and smoking tailpipe drove through here, but truth be told, I was even starting to like his car. It suited him somehow.

Once he was out of sight, I turned and jogged the rest of the way home. After my shower and visit with my mom, Syd and I watched a movie in my bed. She fell asleep halfway through and I didn’t wake her. I turned off the TV, got under my comforter with her, and then got another amazing night of sleep.

Thankfully, Megan’s car was back on the road and she was able to pick me up for school the next morning. I was told to stay away from her, but Dad was already gone before she got there. I’d have to make arrangements for her to pick me up at the stop sign near my house. She’d question it, but I’d cross that bridge when I got to it.

I was never so happy to see her jerk into my driveway. I hated riding the bus full of staring freshmen and sticky seats with gum on them. It was disgusting and I prayed I’d never have to do it again. Still, it was better than riding with my dad or driving the car that was supposed to be mine.

“I’ve missed you, chick. Anything new going on? How’s the voluntary community service going?” She laughed.

I immediately thought of Zeke and how glad I was that I’d decided to volunteer. I couldn’t deny the fact that I was starting to like him. Nothing could ever come from it because I was a total mental head case, but still, it was nice to think I was capable of liking a guy. It gave me a tiny spark of hope and I wanted to latch on to that hope and water it and load it down with sunlight so it could grow.

“What is that look about?” she asked with wide eyes.

“What look?”

“Oh my God, don’t even try to play me! I’ve seen that look before, just never on you.” She giggled. “So, spill it, woman! Who’s the guy?”

I tried to school my face, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get the smile to go down. I tried to smooth the sides of my mouth down with my fingers, but still the goofy smile remained.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I looked out the window since I couldn’t keep a straight face.

“Oh come on, Pay. As women it’s our job to talk about boys. Tell me about him. Anyone I know?” She tapped her fingernails on the steering wheel.

“Okay, so you have to swear not to say anything.” I sighed.

Her eyes lit up at the prospect of some juicy gossip.

“I swear I won’t.” She turned into the school parking lot and barely missed another car. They blew their horn at us and Megan flipped them off.

After I unlatched my hand from the dash, I ran my fingers through my hair and took a deep breath. This was the first time I’d ever confessed being in like with someone.

“So, you know I’ve spent the last few days at the Boy’s Club with Zeke,” I started.

“Oh my God, did you and Zeke make pre-babies?” Her eyes were so big I was afraid they were going to pop out of her head.

“Did me and Zeke what?” I’d never heard anything of the sort.

“You know! Did you guys bump uglies? As in, did you have sex?” She was motioning with her hands for me to hurry up and tell her.

“God, no! Geez, Megan. What I was going to say, before I was so rudely interrupted, is he’s been taking me home afterward and I don’t know… I guess I kind of like him.” My face felt like it was about to combust.

“Well, of course you like him, Pay. He’s hotter than hell. Plus, it doesn’t hurt that he’s amazing with a guitar, which has to mean he’s good with his fingers, but you know me. I have a thing for tattoos and rock stars. I didn’t think you did, though. I’ve never even heard you say a guy was cute before. Honestly, I was starting to think you were into girls.” She shrugged.

“I am not into girls.”

“Hey, no hate over here. You know I don’t care about shit like that.” She held up her hands palms out. “But I just figured…”

“Yeah, well, you figured wrong.” I jumped out of the car and started toward the school. Within seconds, Megan was right beside me.




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