“Ew… I can see you guys,” Senia complains as she jumps out of bed.
Claire sits up so she’s straddling my stomach as she watches Senia pull on some shorts and a hooded T-shirt. Senia pulls the hood over her head, probably to hide her messy bedhead hair, then slides her feet into some sneakers.
“Where are you going?” Claire asks, but I stay quiet. I’m looking forward to having Claire all to myself for a few hours before I leave.
“I’m going to Starbucks then to hang out with Isabel. I’ll be back later. You guys just… enjoy each other while you can.”
She slams the door on her way out and Claire stares at the door for a moment in a daze. She looks down at me and I can see she’s upset.
“It’s Eddie. I think seeing us together is too much for her right now. I feel horrible. Should I go after her?”
I try not to look disappointed as I reply, “You should, if you think it will make both of you feel better.”
She stares at me for a moment as she contemplates her options. It feels like everything and everyone is conspiring to get between Claire and me, and it’s really starting to piss me the fuck off. But I try not to let her see this.
I want to believe that Claire and I will survive our time apart. And I know that it shouldn’t matter whether I leave now or in three hours, but our relationship already seems to be hanging by a thread. This is really bad timing to go on a long trip, but this is my way out of the family company. And I need to get out. I can’t work a hundred miles away from Claire for the next two to three years.
“I’ll talk to her later,” she says as she lies on top of me.
I grab her face and kiss her hard, the kind of kiss she won’t forget for a long time. I kiss her until I’m certain she’ll suffocate if she doesn’t come up for air. I pull her face back to look at her and she’s crying.
“Why? Why do you have to leave?”
“Because sometimes you have to suffer without the things you want now so you can have everything you need later.”
I brush the tears from her face with my thumbs and she closes her eyes as she leans into my hand. This is too fucking hard.
We spend two hours lying in bed, talking and studying each other like curious animals, exploring every curve and crevice and savoring every blissful sensation. The whole time, the unspoken question of whether we can make it through this is heavy between us, like an invisible shield separating us, protecting us from getting close enough to get hurt. This is exactly how I wanted to spend my last day with Claire and it’s also not at all how I wanted to spend it.
We stand just inside the door of her dorm as I get ready to leave. Her arms are wrapped around my waist and I stroke her hair as we gaze at each other in silence. The ache in my chest turns into a throbbing dread that something is going to happen with Chris while I’m gone. I trust Claire, but I don’t trust him for a second.
“I love you, Claire. I want you to know that I won’t do anything to jeopardize what we have. And I trust you, but I also want you to know that if anything does happen while I’m gone, I won’t hesitate to hop on a plane and come back here to fight for what’s mine. I can’t lose you.”
“You’re not going to lose me. You’re still my favorite olive.”
I smile for the first time in hours and I know there’s only one thing left to do.
“Knock, knock.”
She rolls her eyes. “Who’s there?”
“Sherwood.”
“Sherwood, who?”
“Sherwood like to stay, but I have to get going now.”
She shakes her head. “I love you so much.”
I wrap my arms around her waist and lift her off the ground to give her one last kiss. I trace my tongue over her top lip then take her bottom lip into my mouth and suck gently. She moans and just the sound makes me want to take her back to bed so I pull my head back before we get carried away.
“I’ll try to stop by next Friday on the way to the airport, but just in case I can’t, I want you to know that you are all I’ll be thinking about when I’m on that plane. And every day that I’m away from you will be worse than the day before. But I will come back and everything will fall into place. That’s my promise to you.” I kiss her forehead before I set her down on the floor. “You have my whole heart.”
“Are you going straight to the office now?”
“I have to make a stop in Raleigh to meet Yuri. He’s bringing my trophy. I’d ask you to come, but I won’t be able to bring you back.”
She squints her eyes as she contemplates this. “Can I come? I can take my car.”
I stare at her for a moment before I answer. “Nothing would make me happier. You’re gonna love Yuri. His jokes are even better than mine.”
“That’s not saying much,” she says as she moves to the closet and yanks some jeans and a T-shirt off the hangers.
“Hey, you love my jokes. I see how you look at me with those googly eyes every time I deliver a punch line.”
“You’re right. I love you because of your sad jokes, not in spite of them.”
I sneak up behind her as she slides her feet into some flip-flops and wrap my arms around her waist. “I promise I’ll text you plenty of sad jokes when I’m in Hawaii, like this one. Why did Adam accept the apple from Eve?’”
She spins around in my arms so she’s facing me. “Why?”
“Because he couldn’t eat her cherry.”
Her top lip curls up in disgust. “So terrible and now I feel bad for Adam and Eve.”
“Don’t feel bad. Adam eventually found Steve and they lived happily ever after.”
“That’s much better. Gotta have the happily ever after.”
I kiss the corner of her mouth then grab her hand to leave. I don’t say what’s on my mind. She doesn’t need to know how much I doubt that we’ll get our happily ever after.
Chapter Ten
Claire
THE DRIVE TO RALEIGH IS nerve wracking. Four weeks ago, I would have pulled over to the side of the road and meditated for a while to calm my nerves, but I’m trying to limit the meditation to once in the morning and once at night. I’m not a fucking monk. I need to get a grip on my life without having to check out every few minutes at the first sign of emotional turmoil. It’s not as if I think meditation is unhealthy, but it was most certainly unhealthy the way I used it to block out the world. If Adam can quit smoking pot cold turkey, I can limit my meditation fix to twice a day. I have to learn to be present, to feel the emotions instead of stuffing them down beneath a veneer of false serenity.
I pull into a parking space on Wilmington Street about a block away from the Busy Bee Cafe where Adam and I are meeting Yuri and his girlfriend. When I step out of my car—Senia’s old Ford Focus that she gave me the day I moved into the dorm—Adam is walking along the sidewalk toward me. Just watching him, the way he walks with that easy confidence that comes so natural to him, I know that the next two months are going to be hell.
We walk along the sidewalk together in silence, but I can’t help but smile as the girls who pass us in the opposite direction ogle him. From the corner of my eye, I can see him look at me then he gives my hand a gentle squeeze.
“What are you smiling about? Are you happy to be getting rid of me?”
“Just happy to have you.”
He kisses my temple as he reaches for the door at the Busy Bee. I step inside and I’m treated to the most amazing smells, like garlic fries and tacos. I instantly start salivating as the hostess asks how many are in our party.
“We’re looking for our friends,” Adam says and the hostess smiles at him. “A little guy that looks like a darker, sexier version of Keanu Reeves.”
If the girl weren’t wearing a pound of blush, I’m sure I could see her cheeks flush red. Adam doesn’t understand the effect he has on girls. It’s both adorable and infuriating.
“I think they’re in the back.” She pulls a couple of menus from the rack and nods toward the dining area. “I’ll take you there.”
She leads us to a table in the back of the dining room and Yuri’s eyes open wide with excitement at the sight of us. He and Adam engage in a quick, slap-on-the-back guy-hug then Yuri moves in to hug me. I’m surprised by this gesture and I end up giving him an awkward pat on the arm when he releases me.
“Claire, I’ve heard so much about you,” Yuri proclaims excitedly. “This is Lena, the servant of my loins.” Lena punches him in the arm and he laughs. “I mean, the goddess of my universe.”
Lena looks like a female version of Yuri. They have the same golden tanned skin that seems to glisten even in the dim restaurant lighting. They also have the same dark, almond-shaped eyes that glimmer with mischief.
Lena holds out her hand to me as I take a seat. “Nice to meet you, Claire. Don’t pay attention to him. He’s compensating, if you know what I mean.”
I try not to laugh as I shake her hand, but the what-the-fuck look on Yuri’s face kills me. The hostess rolls her eyes as she leaves our menus on the table in front of Adam and mutters something about our server then quickly leaves.
“We’ve been here five seconds and you’ve already offended the hostess. You two should be ashamed of yourselves,” Adam says as he passes me a menu. “What are you all drinking?”
Lena holds up her frosty glass. “We’re both drinking the cream ale. It’s fucking delicious.”
“Not as delicious as my homemade cream ale,” Yuri mutters before he takes a few huge gulps from his glass.
“Dude, can you show a little respect for Adam’s guest?” Lena snipes at him before she turns to me. “So what are you studying at UNC?”
“Sociology. I’m a year behind so I’m doubling up on my units this year to try to catch up.”
“Double units? What are you doing here with these losers?” Lena says with a playful smile.
“Speaking of losers,” Adam interjects. “Did you bring the trophy?”
“It’s in my trunk with all the rest of my junk,” Yuri replies.
The waitress takes our drink orders and we both get an iced tea. I don’t say anything, but I’m glad Adam isn’t drinking today. He orders some tacos and I order a bacon cheeseburger, which puts a smile on Yuri’s face.
“I like a girl who isn’t afraid to eat a juicy burger.”
“Don’t talk to my girl that way,” Adam says, and I can’t tell if he’s kidding, but Yuri’s raised eyebrows tell me he probably isn’t.
I’ve only hung out with two of Adam’s friends before and I admit I was a bit inebriated from the champagne cocktails on my twenty-first birthday. I don’t remember him making any possessive comments that night, but I’ve always known about his temper. And he did admit to me that the reason he was on probation and forced to attend anger management classes was because he beat the shit out of the guy he caught his ex-girlfriend cheating on him with six months ago.
I brush off the comment and we make it through the rest of the meal without further incidents, until Adam asks what happened with the job interview I went on Thursday afternoon.
“They called me back yesterday,” I say as I push my plate away and reach for my glass of water. I take a nice, long drink as I attempt to stall.
I can feel Adam’s gaze on the side of my head, but I really don’t want to tell him what happened when the manager at EspressOasis, the café in the campus food court, called me yesterday.
“What happened?” he persists.
I drain the last few drops of water from the glass before I answer. “They can’t work with my schedule.”
“What about weekends?”