Then I'll tell you, replied he; the difference is, a man ennobles the
woman he takes, be she who she will; and adopts her into his own rank,
be it what it will: but a woman, though ever so nobly born, debases
herself by a mean marriage, and descends from her own rank to his she
stoops to. When the royal family of Stuart allied itself into the low family of
Hyde, (comparatively low, I mean,) did any body scruple to call the
lady, Royal Highness, and Duchess of York? And did any body think her
daughters, the late Queen Mary and Queen Anne, less royal for that?
When the broken-fortuned peer goes into the city to marry a rich
tradesman's daughter, be he duke or earl, does not his consort
immediately become ennobled by his choice? and who scruples to call her
lady, duchess, or countess? But when a duchess or countess dowager descends to mingle with a person
of obscure birth, does she not then degrade herself? and is she not
effectually degraded? And will any duchess or countess rank with her?
Now, Lady Davers, do you not see a difference between my marrying my
dear mother's beloved and deserving waiting-maid, with a million of
excellencies about her, and such graces of mind and person as would
adorn any distinction; and your marrying a sordid groom, whose constant
train of education, conversation, and opportunities, could possibly give
him no other merit, than that which must proceed from the vilest, lowest
taste, in his sordid dignifier? O the wretch! said she, how he finds excuses to palliate his meanness! Again, said he, let me observe to you, Lady Davers, When a duke marries
a private person, is he not still her head, by virtue of being her
husband? But, when a lady descends to marry a groom, is not the groom
her head, being her husband? And does not the difference strike you? For
what lady of quality ought to respect another, who has made so sordid
a choice, and set a groom above her? For, would not that be to put that
groom upon a par with themselves?--Call this palliation, or what you
will; but if you see not the difference, you are blind; and a very unfit
judge for yourself, much more unfit to be a censurer of me.
I'd have you, said she, publish your fine reasons to the world, and they
will be sweet encouragements to all the young gentlemen who read them to
cast themselves away on the servant-wenches in their families. Not at all, Lady Davers, replied he: For, if any young gentleman stays
till he finds such a person as my Pamela, so enriched with the beauties
of person and mind, so well accomplished, and so fitted to adorn the
degree she is raised to, he will stand as easily acquitted, as I shall
be to all the world that sees her, except there be many more Lady Davers
than I apprehend can possibly be met with.