She pulled away from him and went to stand by the pillar where Mortalis had been. “By sleeping with another woman?” She shook her head. “I don’t care if that’s what the pride requires. It doesn’t work for me. Not in any way.”
“What else am I supposed to do?”
“I don’t know, but not that. Not if you want to marry me. If you even still do.”
“Of course I do. Don’t say that.” Letting out a breath, he rolled his shoulders to get some of the tension out of his system. Without the ketamine, he’d have been a fireball right about now. “Look, it sucks hard. I’ll give you that. But it’s an afternoon at most and then she and I are done and you and I can get on with our lives.”
“What if it takes more than an afternoon to get her pregnant? What if it takes a week? Or a month? Or more?” She wiped at her nose. “What if you fall in love with her? What if she falls in love with you and decides not to leave? Women get crazy like that.”
Like he didn’t know that. “That won’t happen. I won’t let it.”
“Maybe I should just show up and beat the daylights out of her like you did with Sinjin.” She held a hand out as if to stop him from arguing. “Not kill her, just, I don’t know, kick her sorry self back to Brazil.”
“Even that wouldn’t work. To displace a pride leader or their mate, the challenge has to come from them. Heaven’s not foolish enough to challenge you.” He took her hand between his. “There’s no other solution but for me to give her a kid. I know you don’t like it, but it’s the only way.”
“It can’t be.” She turned her head toward the fountain. “I won’t stay if you go through with it. I’ll go back to Colorado. Back to my folks. With Mal gone, there’s nothing to keep me here anymore.”
If she’d slapped him it would have stung less. “Nothing to keep you here? Is that what I am? Nothing? What we are? You can throw us away like that? Did you ever really love me or were you just keeping yourself occupied since you were tied to Mal and I was convenient?”
“No.” She looked at him, her eyes clouded with emotions he couldn’t read. “That’s not what I meant.”
Reeling from her statement, he stepped toward her. Only the ketamine kept him from jabbing a finger at her in anger. “You better figure out what you mean and fast, because I’m talking about giving up a child for you.”
She crossed her arms and her brow furrowed. “Maybe you should just stay with Heaven, then.”
“Maybe I should.” Hell, no, that’s not what he wanted at all.
Fi’s lower lip quivered. Then she went ghost and disappeared.
The front door of Chrysabelle’s house slammed, followed by Doc cursing loudly. Chrysabelle glanced toward the downstairs. Further discussion with Mal about the missing names would have to wait. “I should see what’s going on.”
“Let me get my clothes on and I’ll come with you. Seeing me alive might defuse the situation.”
She nodded with hesitation. “I don’t want everyone to know you’re alive, though. Velimai, Fi, Doc, and Mortalis are fine, but not Creek. There’s something odd with him lately. I think the Kubai Mata are pushing him harder. Making him do things he wouldn’t otherwise do.” She lifted one shoulder, trying to play off the seriousness of it. “Anyway, it would just be better if he continues to think, like the rest of the world, that you’re gone.”
“Fine with me.” Mal hitched his thumb beneath the towel covering him from waist to midthigh. “You might want to turn around while I get dressed.” He grinned wickedly. “Or you might not.”
She frowned halfheartedly. “Being dead hasn’t changed you one bit.”
“I wasn’t dead.”
She cupped her elbow in her hand and turned to give him privacy. “You were to me. And you can be again if you don’t behave.”
He answered her over the sound of a zipper zipping. “I don’t think you missed me nearly as much as you claim to.”
“Please,” she said, spinning back around. “I probably missed you more than you deserved.” She laughed. Amazing how quickly one’s outlook on life could change. She loved this banter between them, the fun of it, the lightheartedness of it. She’d never had that in her comarré life, which had been filled with rules and protocol and ritual. “I love you,” she whispered, oddly aware of how precious this time was.
His smile softened. “You okay?”
“Yes. Just thinking how short life can be. Even for people like us.” She sat on the edge of the bed while he pulled his shirt on. There was no better time to tell him what was going on. “Damian is my brother.”
Mal’s brows dipped. “You’re sure?”
“Yes. Creek told me. The Kubai Mata somehow got access to the right records and found out. Creek showed me the file.”
Mal dragged a hand through his damp hair. “We’ll find him, I promise.”
“The KM already have. Tatiana has him.” She traced the pattern woven into the coverlet, trying not to imagine what Tatiana might be doing to him. “I have to rescue him. I have to try.”
Mal walked around and sat on the bed beside her. “You mean we have to rescue him.” He took her hand. “We’ll go back to Corvinestri just as soon as we see that fae you spoke of.”