Paul loads up a marshmallow stick and hands it to me. I offer it to Carrie and she nods. She roasts the marshmallow and pulls it back when it’s a glowing ember. She blows it, grinning at me over the top of it.
She’s happy right this minute. And I can’t help but think she’s the prettiest girl I have ever seen. And I don’t want to be anywhere but here, unless she leaves. And then I want to go with her. I’m referring to the campfire. I think.
Carrie
I can’t believe how nice they all are. They have taken to Nick like he’s extended family. And me, too, for that matter. Sam and Pete just got into a wrestling match in the sand and Nick pulled me back to lean against his chest, getting me out of their way, but I think he just wanted an excuse to put his arms around me. It feels good and safe when he’s holding me, so I lie back and look up into the dark sky, with my head on his shoulder.
I narrow my eyes when I see two forms walking up out of the shadows. “Amber?” I ask.
“Carrie?” she says. She’s walking hand in hand with Seth, Matt’s oldest son. She plops down next to me, and Seth sits next to her.
“Hey Carrie,” Seth says.
“Where have you guys been?” Matt asks.
“We walked down to the pier,” Seth says. He looks up sheepishly, and Amber blushes. I can see the telltale color of her cheeks.
“We have to talk tomorrow,” I whisper to Amber. She nods and smiles. I see Seth’s fingertips overlap hers in the sand and it makes me feel all warm inside.
“You feel like walking to the pier?” Nick asks me. I nod and let him pull me up, wiping the sand off my butt as I stand up.
“Do your parents know where you are?” Paul asks me.
I nod. “They’re a little busy,” I say. I look toward the house and bite my tongue, because I don’t want to say any more.
Matt laughs. “Good for them.”
“Don’t be gone too long,” Paul says.
Nick looks at me and grins. “Yes, sir,” Nick says with a laugh.
Paul shrugs. “I can’t help it. I’m a dad with a daughter.”
“We won’t be gone long,” I tell him. I tug on Nick’s fingertips and walk toward the beach.
“I can’t believe we just sat around a campfire with the Reeds,” Nick says.
“You’re a fan, huh?” I look up at him. He still looks a little star-struck.
“The biggest,” he says. “They’re just like they are on the show, but better.”
“They’re pretty nice.”
“Nice?” he cries. “They’re amazing! Emily Reed just played a song for us.”“I had no idea that’s who she was until she started to sing.”
“Then you knew?”
“I’d have to live under a rock not to know that song.”
He laughs. Then he gets quiet. We walk all the way to the pier with nothing but the waves and the wind talking.
Suddenly he turns to me and takes my face in his hands. I startle a little, but he just holds me tenderly. “I want to kiss you,” he says.
“You totally should.”
“But I don’t think I can.”
My heart stops beating for a moment. “What?” I ask. I cover his hands with mine.
“You’re going to leave me eventually,” he says. “You have to go to school, and I’m not going. I’ll be devastated. I’m not sure I can take losing someone I care about as much as I care about you.”
“You could come and visit.”
He shakes his head. “I can’t. I have too much going on here.”
“So that’s it?” I ask. My gut is in my throat.
“I think we should be friends,” he whispers.
“I think we should be friends who kiss,” I whisper back playfully. But I know he’s serious. He’s telling me no.
“Can friends kiss?” he asks. His eyes search my face in the moonlight.
I step onto my tiptoes and touch my lips to his. He hesitates for a second, and I worry that I’ve made a mistake. He kisses me, his lips tender and soft at first, but then he growls and wraps his arms around me. His hands slide under my shirt and tickle up and down my back as his lips ravage mine. Greedy, wonderful fingers slip into the waistband of my shorts and splay across my bottom, and then he jerks me against his hardness. I can feel every inch of him and tell how much he wants me, but he lifts his head and buries his face in my neck.
“Don’t make me fall in love with you,” he says quietly.
I look up and brush a lock of hair from his forehead. “I’ll do my best.”
We walk back to my house hand in hand, absorbing the quiet. The wind tickles my skin almost as much as his proximity does. We wave to the Reeds as we walk by and he takes me all the way to my door. He kisses me softly and quickly, then stops to take a deep breath by my hair. I can feel the tension in his arms and I want to hold him. But something tells me he doesn’t want to be held.
“Good night,” he says.
“Night,” I reply. He stands there while I open the door, and then I see him walk off into the darkness.
I find Mom sitting on the couch when I go inside, and she grins at me. “So, did he kiss you?” she asks. I remember how mean I was to her the last time she asked me and I regret it.
I sit down next to her and let my shoulder touch hers. “Yeah, he kissed me.”
She laughs. “Tell me about it,” she says.