I feel suddenly warm as I’m walking back out, like exhaustion has finally taken over. I’m swaying on my feet. I yawn, and my skin feels tingly as I plod along towards my bed. I feel heavy, and yet strangely light. I stare at the other girls, and see Number Seven is already asleep. She didn’t even get changed. Number Three is in the bathroom, changing. Number Twelve is sitting on her bed, her eyes flickering open and shut as she tries to stay awake. I guess we all needed some food and rest.
I crawl onto my bed, grateful it’s not a hard concrete floor. The mattress is too soft, and the pillow too hard, but I’m so exhausted I don’t care to notice. I pull the blanket up over my body, and my eyes flicker shut. I try to force them back open so I can reach across and turn the lamp off, but I can’t seem to muster up the strength to lift my lids, let alone my hands. My entire body feels like it’s sinking into the mattress, and my head begins to swim.
That’s the last thing I recall.
“Get up!”
The voice comes into the room, loud and booming. I let my eyelids flutter open, and I see it’s still mostly dark out. The sun is only just starting to shed its light on the horizon. I’m fuzzy for a moment, trying to remember where I am. It’s hazy, but after a moment, clarity forms, and I recall the situation I’ve been put in. I’m being kept slave to a master I don’t see. I try to recall the last moments before I fell asleep last night, but they appear muddled.
“I said, now!” the guard barks, flicking on the light.
I squint, pressing my hand over my eyes, trying to adjust. I hear heavy footsteps, and someone else squeak. I blink rapidly, moving my hand, and I see the guard is holding Number Three up. She’s sobbing again, and her legs are shaking. I force my body up, and I throw my legs out of the bed. I’m still quite dazed, and it takes me a long moment to gather myself. The guard drags Number Three into the bathroom, and I hear her pleas as he forces her to shower. I also hear the loud slap when she doesn’t do as he says.
I turn my eyes nd urn my to Number Twelve and Number Seven, and they’re both staring at the bathroom, their faces a mask of pure horror. They know they’re coming up soon, and they know there’s nothing they can do about it. I swallow the lump forming in my throat, and I walk over to the girls, placing my hand on Number Twelve’s arm. She jumps, and turns around quickly, her eyes frantic. “It’s okay,” I say, my voice crackly from sleep. “It’s going to be okay.”
“We should get dressed,” Number Seven says, without moving her eyes from the door. “We don’t want to make him angry.”
I nod, and we all quickly dress into a basic set of shorts and a top. Then we all stand by our beds, waiting, unsure what we’re supposed to do.
The guard comes out a moment later, still clutching Number Three who has stopped crying, but her face is scrunched in fear. He shoves her towards the door, and leads her out. A moment later he shoves a cart through, containing our breakfast. He barks, “Eat that, and put the trays back. Then wait here for my command.” Then he leaves with Number Three.
None of us feel like eating.
My stomach is turning with fear for Number Three. What if the master isn’t as kind to her? What if he hurts her? What if she doesn’t please him? Will she get taken away like Number Six? Will they hurt her? Or worse, kill her? The questions swimming around in my mind allow me no breaks, and the coiling in my stomach intensifies. I stare at the trays, knowing if we don’t eat breakfast, we’ll be punished. I also don’t know when we’ll be fed again, and I don’t want to risk being left hungry.
“We should eat,” Number Seven says. “I know we don’t want to, but we should.”
Her voice is quiet and timid, but she’s right. We should eat. We each take a tray, and sit it beside our beds again. This time I’m not so excited about the food in front of me. I lift the silver lid to reveal a bowl of muesli, with fruit on the side, and a glass of orange juice. I lift the glass, sipping the juice tentatively, slowly easing it into my stomach. When it seems to settle there well enough, I take a mouthful of muesli, and take a grape from the bowl of fruit.
It takes me twenty minutes to eat my breakfast, but I manage to get it down. When I’m finished, I place my plate onto the cart, and stand beside my bed again. The other girls follow my actions, until we’re all standing silently, wondering if Number Three is ok. Is this how they felt yesterday when I was taken? Were they filled with this much fear? Did they wonder if I would ever come back? The very idea has desperation flooding my veins once more.
I need to get away from here.
“Line up outside.”
The guard’s voice comes into the room before he does, and we all obey, heading towards the door and stepping out to line up outside it. He stands in front of us, looking at us as though we disgust him. I don’t understand why he’s so mean, yet Master William is so quiet. Or maybe he’s not quiet; maybe he’s playing a game with us, allowing us to believe we’re safe for a little while before he shows us his true self.
I cast my eyes to the floor, and I don’t move them as the guard begins to speak.
“Number Three will be with the master this morning; the rest of you will work in the garden with group three. You will break only for lunch, and then you will work through the afternoon before helping group one in the kitchen. Do as you are told, and there will be no punishments.”
We all nod.
He turns, and we follow him down the halls, through the large, beautiful home. He takes us down to the owldown tobottom floor, and leads us outside. I can’t help but inhale the second we step into the fresh, crisp air. The smell of flowers and pine fill my nose, and I just take that moment to enjoy it. I know there won’t be many moments to enjoy things here, but I plan to take every, single one that’s offered to me.