“I’m writing my life story. I thought I’d give it to whoever adopts my baby and . . .”
“You’ve decided not to keep it?”
“Yes. As I was saying, they can give it to him when he’s grown. Maybe it will help him understand who I was and why I had to give him away.”
“It might be a girl, you know.”
“No, it’s a boy. I’m sure of it. Do you think Dr. Ramsden could help me with the adoption?”
“Are you sure about this? I mean, it’s kind of sudden, isn’t it?”
“I think it would be best for the baby. Don’t you?”
“I don’t know, Mara. This has to be your decision, but if you’re sure it’s what you want, why not ask Rane and Savanah if they’d like to adopt him? That way you could see him—or her—whenever you want.”
“Of course,” Mara said, wondering why she hadn’t thought of it herself. She considered Rane and his kin as family. Who better to raise her child? Her son and Rane’s daughter would grow up as brother and sister. “I’ll go see him tomorrow night . . .” Her words trailed off. She could no longer will herself to Porterville. She looked up at Logan. “Will you drive me?”
“How about if I take you there, vampire-style?”
“I’d like that,” she said wistfully. She missed her preternatural powers more with every passing day, missed her old life and all that it had entailed.
“Tomorrow night, then,” Logan said. “Will it be a problem, my being there?”
“I don’t think so.” Vampires were notoriously territorial, but she was sure that, since Logan was her friend, he would be welcome in Cordova territory.
The thought of seeing Rane again filled her with excitement, but it was short-lived. She had always been the strong one, the Queen of the Vampires. How would Rane and his family feel about her when they learned her powers were gone? Would they look at her with pity, or with contempt?
Rising from the computer, she looked up at Logan. “I don’t think I can face them.”
“Why not?”
“Because I . . . because he’s . . . they’re . . .”
“Ah,” Logan murmured. “You’re embarrassed because you’re no longer one of them.” He stroked her cheek. “One of us.”
She nodded. “I was always the one in control. Now I’m . . . prey.”
Muttering an oath, Logan drew her into his arms. “Stop that! I’ve never met any of the Cordova vampires, but from what you’ve told me, they’re not going to feel any different about you. And I’ll be there to protect you, just in case I’m wrong.”
Mara wrapped her arms around his waist. “You’re so good to me, Logan, and so good for me,” she murmured, and wondered again why she had ever left him.
Logan and Mara left for Rane’s home just after dusk the following evening. For Mara, being whisked through the air while under someone else’s power was a new experience. As a vampire, it was exhilarating; as a human, it made her feel queasy and a little dizzy. She added it to the long list of things she didn’t like about being human.
When they arrived at Rane’s house, Mara took a deep breath, then knocked on the front door, wondering what Rane and Savanah would think when they saw her. The fact that she was pregnant was clearly evident now.
Rane smiled when he saw her standing on the porch. “Mara! This is a surprise,” he said enthusiastically.
Rane’s expression sobered when he saw Logan standing behind her and recognized him for what he was. Even without her preternatural senses, Mara was aware of the way the two men sized each other up, like two feral wolves meeting for the first time.
“This is my friend Logan,” Mara said quickly. “I hope you’ll make him welcome.”
Rane nodded. “Of course. I’m pleased to meet you. Come in.” Rane tried not to stare at Mara as she entered the house. It had been one thing to hear she might be pregnant, quite another to see the truth of it with his own eyes.
Mara preceded Logan and Rane into the living room. Savanah was sitting in a rocking chair with Abbey in her arms. The baby looked pink and perfect.
Rane introduced Logan to his wife and invited Mara and Logan to sit down. Mara didn’t have to be a mind reader to know that Rane and Savanah had both noticed she was pregnant but were too polite to mention it.
“So, Mara,” Rane asked, taking a seat across from the sofa, “what brings you here?”
Mara placed her hand over her stomach. “I need to ask you a favor,” she said, “a rather large favor.”
“Sure, anything,” he said. “You know that.”
“I’m going to have a baby at the end of October, and I’d like you and Savanah to adopt it.”
So, Rane thought. It was true. Frowning, he looked at Logan. “Are you . . . ?”
“Of course not,” Logan replied.
“How did this happen?” Rane asked, unable to hide his astonishment.
“The usual way,” Mara replied dryly.
“But . . .”
“I don’t know how it happened. The doctor doesn’t know. It just”—she made a vague gesture with her hand—“happened.”
Rane looked thoughtful for a moment, then said, “It’s Kyle’s, isn’t it?”
“Yes, but he doesn’t know, and I don’t want him to.”
“Don’t you think he has a right to know?” Rane asked.
“I’m not sure what went wrong between the two of you, but he’s been here a couple of times trying to find you. I think he still loves you.”
“He thinks I’m a monster.”
“Well, you’re not anymore,” Rane pointed out.
“I don’t want to talk about Kyle,” Mara said flatly. “He has no part of this.”
“Why don’t you keep the baby?” Savanah asked, hugging her daughter closer.
Mara shook her head. “I don’t know how to be a mother.”
“No one does, until it happens,” Savanah said, smiling. “You should at least give it a try.”
“I don’t know.” Mara’s gaze settled on Abbey. She had never wanted children, never thought to have any of her own. Just then, her baby gave a lusty kick. Placing her hand over her abdomen, Mara felt the first stirring of love for the child she carried. Maybe she could be a good mother. And she didn’t have to stay mortal forever. Once her baby was grown, she could ask Logan or one of the Cordova men to make her a vampire again.