Mr. Vandemar negotiated a particularly awkward corner. “Kill someone, you mean?” he asked.
Mr. Croup beamed. “Kill someone I mean indeed, Mister Vandemar, brave soul, glittering, noble fellow. However, by now you must have sensed a lurking ‘but’ skulking beneath my happy, blithe, and chipper exterior. A minuscule vexation, like the teeniest lump of raw liver sticking to the inside of my boot. You must, I have no doubt, be saying to yourself, ‘All is not well in Mister Croup’s breast. I shall induce him to unburden himself to me.’ “
Mr. Vandemar pondered this while he forced open the round iron door between the storm drain and the sewer and clambered through. Then he manhandled the wire cart with the marquis de Carabas’s body through the doorway. And then, more or less certain that he had been thinking nothing of the sort, he said, “No.”
Mr. Croup ignored this, and continued, ” . . . And, were I then, in response to your pleadings, to divulge to you what vexes me, I would confess that my soul is irked by the necessity to hide our light under a bushel. We should be hanging the former marquis’s sad remains from the highest gibbet in London Below. Not tossing it away, like a used . . . ” He paused, searching for the exact simile.
“Rat?” suggested Mr. Vandemar. “Thumbscrew? Spleen?” Squee, squee went the wheels of the shopping cart.
“Ah well,” said Mr. Croup. In front of them was a deep channel of brown water. Drifting on the water’s surface were off-white suds of foam, used condoms, and occasional fragments of toilet paper. Mr. Vandemar stopped the shopping cart. Mr. Croup leaned down and picked up the marquis’s head by the hair, hissing into its dead ear, “The sooner this business is over and done with, the happier I’ll be. There’s other times and other places that would properly appreciate two pair of dab hands with the garrotting wire and the boning knife.”
Then he stood up. “Goodnight, good marquis. Don’t forget to write.”
Mr. Vandemar tipped over the cart, and the marquis’s corpse tumbled out and splashed into the brown water below them. And then, because he had come to dislike it intensely, Mr. Vandemar pushed the shopping cart into the sewer as well, and watched the current carry it away.
Then Mr. Croup held his lamp up high, and he stared out at the place in which they stood. “It is saddening to reflect,” said Mr. Croup, “that there are folk walking the streets above who will never know the beauty of these sewers, Mister Vandemar. These red-brick cathedrals beneath their feet.”
“Craftsmanship,” agreed Mr. Vandemar.
They turned their backs on the brown water and made their way back into the tunnels. “With cities, as with people, Mister Vandemar,” said Mr. Croup, fastidiously, “the condition of the bowels is all-important.”
Door tied the key around her neck with a piece of string that she found in one of the pockets of her leather jacket. “That’s not going to be safe,” said Richard. The girl made a face at him. “Well,” he said. “It’s not.”
She shrugged. “Okay,” she said. “I’ll get a chain for it when we get to the market.” They were walking through a maze of caves, deep tunnels hacked from the limestone that seemed almost prehistoric.
Richard chuckled. “What’s so funny?” Door asked.
He grinned. “I was just thinking of the expression on the marquis’s face when we tell him we got the key from the friars without his help.”
“I’m sure he’ll have something sardonic to say about it,” she said. “And then, back to the angel. By the ‘long and dangerous way.’ Whatever that is.”
Richard admired the paintings on the cave walls. Russets and ochres and siennas outlined charging boars and fleeing gazelles, woolly mastodons and giant sloths: he imagined that the paintings had to be thousands of years old, but then they turned a corner, and he noticed that, in the same style, there were lorries, house cats, cars, and—markedly inferior to the other images, as if only glimpsed infrequently, and from a long way away—airplanes.
None of the paintings were very high off the ground. He wondered if the painters were a race of subterranean Neanderthal pygmies. It was as likely as anything else in this strange world. “So where is the next market?” he asked.
“No idea,” said Door. “Hunter?”
Hunter slipped out of the shadows. “I don’t know.”
A small figure dashed past them, going back the way they had come. A few moments later another couple of tiny figures came toward them in fell pursuit. Hunter whipped out a hand as they passed, snagging a small boy by the ear. “Ow,” he said, in the manner of small boys. “Let me go! She stole my paintbrush.”
“That’s right,” said a piping voice from further down the corridor. “She did.”
“I didn’t,” came an even higher and more piping voice, from even further down the corridor.
Hunter pointed to the paintings on the cave wall. “You did these?” she asked.
The boy had the towering arrogance only seen in the greatest of artists and all nine-year-old boys. “Yeah,” he said, truculently. “Some of them.”
“Not bad,” said Hunter. The boy glared at her.
“Where’s the next Floating Market?” asked Door.
“Belfast,” said the boy. “Tonight.”
“Thanks,” said Door. “Hope you get your paintbrush back. Let him go, Hunter.”
Hunter let go of the boy’s ear. He did not move. He looked her up and down, then made a face, to indicate that he was, without any question at all, unimpressed. “You’re Hunter?” he asked. She smiled down at him, modestly. He sniffed. “You’re the best bodyguard in the Underside?”
“So they tell me.”
The boy reached one hand back and forward again, in one smooth movement. He stopped, puzzled, and opened his hand, examined his palm. Then he looked up at Hunter, confused. Hunter opened her hand to reveal a small switchblade with a wicked edge. She held it up, out of the boy’s reach. He wrinkled his nose. “How’d you do that?”
“Scram,” said Hunter. She closed the knife and tossed it back to the boy, who took off down the corridor without a backward glance, in pursuit of his paintbrush.
The body of the marquis de Carabas drifted east, through the deep sewer, face down.
London’s sewers had begun their lives as rivers and streams, flowing north to south (and, south of the Thames, south to north) carrying garbage, animal carcasses, and the contents of chamber pots into the Thames, which would, for the most part, carry the offending substances out to sea. This system had more or less worked for many years, until, in 1858, the enormous volume of effluent produced by the people and industries of London, combined with a rather hot summer, produced a phenomenon known at the time as the Great Stink: the Thames itself had become an open sewer. People who could leave London, left it; the ones who stayed wrapped cloths doused in carbolic around their faces and tried not to breathe through their noses. Parliament was forced to recess early in 1858, and the following year it ordered that a programme of sewer-building begin. The thousands of miles of sewers that were built were constructed with a gentle slope from the west to the east, and, somewhere beyond Greenwich, they were pumped into the Thames Estuary, and the sewage was swept off into the North Sea. It was this journey that the body of the late marquis de Carabas was making, traveling west to east, toward the sunrise and the sewage works.