The tears are falling when I finish my speech, but I no longer care. I got it out, all the words I knew I'd have to say. The hardest words I've ever said. Part of me wants to take them all back, suck the words in and pretend they were never spoken, and instead beg him to stay, to be with me, to rule with me. But I can't. I won't. To love someone, to truly love them, is to love them without expectation or agenda. To love someone is to let them be free.
A silence hangs heavy between us. Even Yami and Baron are both still, silent, though Yami woke sometime during this talk.
When I look at Fen, my chest clenches in longing and pain. Every line on his face is as familiar as my own. His eyes, those piercing blue orbs, pull me in and I want to swim in them forever. His arms, his chest, I want nothing more than to be held by him and for him to never let me go.
But I can do this. If I have learned nothing else over the past several months since my mother lapsed into a coma, it's that I am much stronger than I ever imagined. I have been tested time and again, pushed to every limit I have, physically, mentally and emotionally. I have endured imprisonment, torture, a death sentence and war. I have learned and grown and found magic and strength within.
And so I can do this.
I can let the man I love lead a life of peace.
Without me.
My hand falls to my stomach again.
Without us.
Fen pulls away from me and I drop my head so he doesn't see how hard this is.
"Arianna?"
His voice is deep, raw, powerful.
I look up and he's on his knees, holding a ring. The ring he first gave me what feels like a lifetime ago. The ring I left with Marasphyr to give to him when I left the Rift. I admit I was skeptical she'd actually do it.
"Marry me," he says. "Be my wife. My partner. My Queen."
My heart skips and there's a whooshing sound in my ears that I assume is my blood doing some kind of primal dance in my head. "What? But… "
"I heard what you said. I listened to you, now I need you to listen to me," he says. "I was wrong. About this world, about our people… about myself. I'd forgotten who I was. But I remember now. I know who I am. I have found my purpose. And it is with you."
I'm about to interrupt him, to point out that he can't become king just to be with me, but he places a finger over my lips.
"Let me finish."
I nod, and he brushes his hand against my cheek before continuing. "I was under a curse, but not the one I thought." He tells me of the Darkness, of what he and Tavian and Marasphyr did so many years ago. He tells me of their curses, and how it affected each of them differently. "When the Darkness weakened, it also created cracks in my curse. Memories began filtering in, and I started to remember who I was. Who I truly was. I was the Moonlight Prince. It was my sword that was originally lost. With it, I could help you destroy the Darkness. I could undo the damage I'd done. And once the curse was completely broken, I felt all the parts of myself returning. I don't just want you, Arianna, though the gods know I've never wanted anything so badly as I do you—but I want this too." He holds up his hands and gestures to everything around us. "I want to bring peace to the Fae and vampires. I want to help you create a new kind of government, a new life for our people. I want to raise our child in a world that we help make better. I want to be king. I'm not running away anymore. I'm not Lucian's son, I'm the son of the two women who loved me enough to give up everything for me. My Fae mother died bringing me into the world, and my vampire mother gave me her own blood to save me. I am not made of war, but of love, and I want to bring that love to my wife, my child, and my kingdom. Both of our kingdoms."
My hands are trembling and more tears are flowing down my face. Both Yami and Baron are sitting at attention, ears perked, watching us raptly.
"Say yes," he begs, his eyes so earnest it nearly destroys me.
"Yes," I say, my throat clogged with emotion. "Yes, I'll marry you, Fenris Vane, my Moonlight Prince."
He slips the ring onto my finger and pulls me against him. The day is fading, and as the sun sets and the moons rise in the sky, I revel in the joy my heart feels at knowing I get to be with this man forever.
"Marry me now," he says after a long silence of holding each other.
"Now?"
"Yes, now, here. We can break the curse tonight. Free your mother. Begin our lives. Unless you have a burning urge to finish out your months with my brothers? Ace perhaps? Or Zeb?"
I choke out a laugh. "No, I'm good. Thanks, though. But, don't we need someone to officiate, or paperwork or something?"
He shakes his head. "Not in this world. Yami and Baron are powerful Spirits, and can bear witness. We can speak our vows in their presence. We can have the big ceremony if you want, later, but tonight, right now, I want to know you are mine forever."
And so we stand and hold each other's hands. Yami and Baron take their roles very seriously and give the short ceremony full attention.
"I take you, Arianna Spero, to be my wife, my partner, my lover, my Queen, for now and all eternity. Not even death can sever this vow or my love for you."
His words spark a glow in my chest that makes my whole body feel on fire. "And I take you, Fenris Vane, to be my husband, my partner, my lover, my King, for now and all eternity. Not even death can sever this vow or my love for you."
When he kisses me, I feel a magic move through us, slowly tearing apart at the contract I signed. Yami and Baron seem to sense a shift in the mood around us and disappear into the forest as Fen lays me down on a thick bed of grass.