“You know,” I say, conversationally, “you’re in more denial than I was when I first met Lia. You can lie to yourself as much as you want, but you and I both know that you want her.”
“I’ve never denied that I’m attracted to her,” he says defensively. “That doesn’t mean anything, though. I have sex with women I find attractive on a regular basis. Life moves on though, and so do I.”
“I’m not suggesting you’re a monk,” I snap testily. Damn, talking to him is what I would imagine it would be like questioning some teenage girl who’s two hours late for curfew. “It just appears you have some feelings for this one. I’ve never seen you in my office rattled over pussy before.” Yeah, I know it’s a crude statement, but it’s true.
“For fuck’s sake, Luc, can you not talk about her like that?” I want to grin; I really do, because I have him now. He just played right into my hands with his indignant response.
“My apologies,” I say smoothly and see his face tighten in recognition. For a lawyer who makes a living out of his ability to avoid being bated, he just fell neatly into my verbal trap.
“Look,” he begins quietly, “I do care for Rose. I’ve never met a woman quite like her. She’s not my usual type of woman, though.”
“Disposable, you mean?” I ask, without a hint of judgment in my voice. I’d been the same before Lia, so I certainly have no room to talk.
“Yes, exactly. Rose is…aggressive, but she’s long term, whether she admits it or not.”
I lean back, crossing my legs as I study my friend. He and I have been close for years, but there are periods of his life I know nothing about. Not for the first time, I find myself curious. To me, Max is a man who should be living the picket fence dream. Why he avoids it like the plague is a real mystery. Feeling as if I’ve pried enough, I say, “I’m not going to push you on this because it’s none of my business, but just give it some thought.” Attempting to lighten the tension surrounding us, I joke, “After all, she doesn’t do so well with idle time. She’s probably looking at five to ten years if her Tupperware order comes in late.”
Max relaxes in his chair, chuckling in wry amusement. “She’s hell on wheels. I know grown men who don’t have half the balls she has.”
“That’s true,” I agree. “Normally, I’d recommend you run as fast as you can in the opposite direction, but despite all of her gun-wielding ways, Rose is a good person. If I had never met her, I’d believe that just because of the way Lia cares so much for her.”
“How’s Lia doing by the way?” Max asks in what is probably equal parts genuine affection and the need to change the subject.
“Other than throwing up almost every morning, she’s great. She gets more fucking beautiful by the day.”
“It still amazes me that you’re so besotted now.” Max shakes his head in wonder. “I never thought it would happen, but I couldn’t be happier for you. She’s the real deal, my friend, so don’t do anything to screw it up.”
“I won’t,” I say with complete conviction.
“How’s the detox going?” he asks in a low voice. He knows well that I’d never want Cindy to find out.
Running a hand through my hair, I tell him the same thing I’ve told Sam and Aidan. “It’s been hell at times. Having to downplay it to Lia is one of the hardest parts. I don’t want to hit her with more stress, but I’m not going to lie, my skin is crawling most nights. I ended up medicating to take some of the edge off before I lost it and scared her. The nightmares are beginning to tap down, which is a relief. If I wasn’t afraid I’d never stop, I’d be smoking a pack a day right now.” I remember well the first few weeks after stopping cocaine cold turkey. I’d wake in the middle of the night covered in sweat, with my heart racing. I’d sit against the bathroom wall trying to calm myself without waking Lia. If there had been an ounce of coke left in the apartment, I fear I would have caved and used it. The side effects have lessened, but the urge still sits there, just below the surface, as it probably always will. When I look at Lia, carrying my child, I believe there is nothing I would do that would take me away from her.
Ever loyal, he says confidently, “You’ll make it, Luc, of that I am certain. By the way, where’s Aidan been hiding himself? I haven’t seen him for a few weeks now.”
“He’s still tied up with the Kenson deal. He’s been onsite a good bit in the last month. They seem to prefer the personal approach to emails and phone calls. Be ready to draft another offer to them soon. I believe we’re in the end stages now.”
“I’ll give him a call later on today,” Max says easily, comfortable once again in his legal element. “Has he mentioned anything else about Cassie to you?”
Now I’m the one wanting to change the subject. Max isn’t asking because he’s nosy, though. He’s always looking out for my interests and he’s used to overseeing most of my affairs, including Cassie. “We discussed her briefly before he left town this last time. Both he and her doctors believe she’s still making a miraculous recovery thanks to her new medication.”
Max looks as uncomfortable as I feel about this information. “I guess that’s good news,” he finally says uneasily. “Luc, maybe it wasn’t the best idea for you to turn her guardianship over to Aidan. I mean, I know it’s too difficult for you to deal with, but I’ve never complained about overseeing matters with her. It’s not that I don’t trust Aidan,” he rushes to add, “but he loves her and as such may not be capable of looking at her care objectively.”