“Decide what to tell me?” Thanatos frowned, and then sucked in a harsh breath as realization dawned. “You weren’t going to tell me, were you?” He felt the ground shift beneath him as the magnitude of Ares’s and Limos’s betrayal rocked him. “You weren’t going to tell me I was a father.”
“Yes we were, but the rest of the plan isn’t about you.” Ares held up his hands in a soothing gesture that was so not soothing. “If Pestilence finds out about Regan’s pregnancy, the child’s life will be in danger.”
Son of a—Okay, yeah, there was that. He’d been out of his mind for a while there, but Ares was right. “Pestilence would love to hurt me through a child.”
“More than that,” Ares said. “We think the baby is your agimortus.”
Of course. Than had spent the last months wondering why his Seal hadn’t broken and trying to figure out what would break it. And now the warmth he felt when he was near Regan made sense. He was feeling his agimortus.
“How did you get free?” Ares asked. “You weren’t due for another dose of hellhound venom for a couple of hours.”
Thanatos glared at Hal, and he swore the mutt smiled. “I felt a pull that seemed to neutralize the effect of the venom. Turns out it was the baby.” Than nearly stumbled over the baby word. So… foreign. “I didn’t know what it was until I got to Aegis headquarters and found Regan. There were demons loose, and she and the baby were in danger.”
“So you sensed the child?”
“Apparently.” The sense had dulled now that the immediate danger had passed, but inside, he definitely vibrated with an awareness that had been with him for months but that he hadn’t been able to identify. “You’ve always been able to sense your agimortus. Must be why I can feel the baby.” He gnashed his teeth, frustrated by pretty much everything that had happened today. “By the way, I saw Hades. He said Reseph has his sights set on destroying Azagoth and Sheoul-gra.”
“Not much we can do about that. We’ve got enough on our plates in the human realm. Underworlders are on their own. Now, where is Regan?” Ares repeated.
“She’s safe. That’s all you need to know.”
“Shit,” Ares muttered. “You need to return her to The Aegis. That’s the only way she’ll be safe.”
“You think I can’t protect her?”
“Your temper—”
“My temper is under control,” he roared, and yep, that display surely convinced Ares.
Ares smoothed his hand over the hound’s head, calming the beast. What a huge change, given that only a year ago Ares had been gunning to destroy every hellhound in existence.
“You don’t remember, do you?” he asked quietly.
Uh-oh. “Remember what?”
“The reason we incapacitated you in the first place.”
Than’s stomach turned over. He didn’t want to know. He really didn’t. The scorpion started stinging his neck, letting him know that what he’d done was poison to his very soul. “What … shit, what did I do?”
“You nuked the island, almost killed Arik, and very nearly damaged Reaver and Limos permanently.”
Thanatos’s mind spun with confusion. “What island?” The look on Ares’s face said it all, and Than stumbled back a step. “No. Not this island. Oh, Jesus. How … how bad?” Than asked, but deep down, he knew. Vampires were immune to his death blasts, but few others were.
“Angels intercepted the shockwave, but they couldn’t save many. You left few alive.”
It all came back in a rush, a broken dam releasing so many memories. The thousands of the souls in his armor went crazy, evidence of what he’d done.
If a million angels descended on him right now and cast a million lightning bolts at him, the punishment wouldn’t be enough. If it went on for centuries it would n’t be enough.
“I was so angry at Regan … at her betrayal. The Aegis f**ked us over, and then Reseph…” Thanatos had been riding Styx hard, chasing Regan across the frozen tundra, and Reseph…no, Pestilence …had come out of nowhere, had beaten Than to a bloody pulp and nearly killed Styx. If not for Cara, the stallion would be dead.
“That’s why we didn’t want to tell you about Regan and the baby. We mentioned her name once, outside the bedroom door. You must have overheard, because you let out a mini death wave that killed two of my Ramreels.” Ares’s voice warbled, just a little, but for him, that was a major show of emotion. “We didn’t know what you’d do if we actually tried to talk to you about her.”
“Shit, Ares. I’m sorry.” Thanatos rubbed his sternum, but it didn’t relieve the heavy crush of guilt. “Why did The Aegis do it? Regan claims she didn’t drug the wine—”
“She didn’t. The Aegis is still at the heart of it, but no, Pestilence arranged for the wine.”
“How?”
“He replaced Atrius with a doppelgänger. We found the doppelgänger dead.”
Which meant that Atrius was dead, too. Doppelgängers and the being they were created to replace shared life forces. Damn it! Atrius’s sense of humor had lightened up the keep, and he’d been instrumental in keeping the rivalry between the nightwalker and daywalker vamps in check. Than would miss him.
“So Pestilence must have killed Atrius after the deed was done.”
“Or one of your staff killed the doppelgänger, but they all denied it. We tested the rest of your staff to make sure no one else was a doppelgänger.” When Than lifted a brow in question, Ares expounded. “We pulled a fang from each vamp. They all grew back.”
A fang removed from a doppelgänger wouldn’t be replaced. Than scrubbed his hand over his face.
“Speaking of fangs—”
“Don’t.” Thanatos cut off his brother. “Don’t go there.”
“I am going there, Than,” Ares growled. “Reseph grew fangs when he turned into Pestilence. You grew fangs after your nuclear meltdown. Or after sex with Regan. Something’s up, and I’m not letting it go.”
“You have to. I won’t discuss it.” Ares was so wrong about when Than had gained his fangs, but Than couldn’t tell his brother that he’d had them since they were cursed as Horsemen. It was a secret he was forbidden to share, even with his own siblings. He changed the subject, although he knew Ares wouldn’t be deterred for long. “Do you think Regan is lying about being drugged, too?”
If Regan had truly drunk the wine instead of merely pretending, as he’d suspected, then much of his anger was misplaced. He hadn’t been able to stand up to its aphrodisiac properties; a human stood no chance. And if she was telling the truth about losing control of her gift that incapacitated him … shit. Now he didn’t know what to think.
“I believe her about the wine, but she did come here to seduce you.”
A sickening feeling came over him. “To get pregnant. But why… wait. Don’t tell me. I’m going to get it from the source.”
Six
Your life is now mine.
Wrapping herself in the blanket at the end of Than’s bed, Regan sank down on the mattress and concentrated on staying calm. It wasn’t easy. She’d been in countless life-or-death situations, had nearly died twice, but she’d never been as close to panic as she was now.
All those other times, she’d never truly feared for herself. She’d feared more for her colleagues or for innocent bystanders, but even then, the fear had never interfered with her ability to think or fight. On the contrary; the fear had given her an edge. Now it was paralyzing, because all she could think about was the baby.
“Breathe,” she murmured. “Just breathe.”
She inhaled slowly for the count of three and then released the breath with the same count. It was a trick an Aegis doctor had taught her to combat her obsessive-compulsive attacks…attacks like this one, where she’d get something stuck in her head. It would play over and over, like a skipping record, until she either powered out of it, found a distraction, or found a ritual to ease her mind.
Right now, her ritual was to breathe, but it would only work temporarily. The moment she stopped counting, the panic would resurface, and a newer, worse thought would pop into her head, something completely out there, like if she didn’t bounce a ball five times in a row, the baby could die.
Her struggle with OCD had been lifelong, and hers hadn’t been a typical case at all. Doctors had never been able to get a handle on it, not only because her symptoms and behavior had been all over the place, but because she couldn’t take any of the common medications used to treat it. Hell, she couldn’t take any medications at all. Even before the pregnancy, she’d always had bizarre reactions to even mild over-the-counter meds, like aspirin.
Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
Think of a way to get out of here.
Inhale. Exhale.
Cell phone! Standing, she shoved her hands into her pants pockets. Nothing. It must have fallen out of her pocket when Thanatos picked her up like a caveman hauling off his kill to his lair.
Inhale. Exhale.
He’d also gotten the one weapon she could have used against him when he knocked the dagger out of her hand.
Inhale. Exhale.
What she wouldn’t give for that bit of parchment on her nightstand.
The door opened, and there was no more inhaling or exhaling. Her breath jammed in her lungs as Thanatos strode into the room, his expression stormy, his body taut as a bowstring.
“You have some explaining to do.” His voice was like rolling thunder.
As he slammed the door shut in Ares’s face, she played nonchalant, when really, inside she was preparing for a possible EF-5 tornado.
“How about you start with the explanations?” she countered. “Like, how did you find me? Aegis Headquarters has always been kept secret, even from you guys.”