Regan’s soul.
He leaped off the bed and stared at her shadowy form. She was confused, her eyes wet with unshed tears as her gaze met his with what he swore was accusation. Or maybe that was just his guilt talking. But it didn’t matter. He’d killed her, and now she was going to become part of his armor, tormented to the point of insanity by the captivity and by the other souls until she finally escaped and made a kill.
Which would then send her straight to Sheoul-gra.
Instead of giving her eternal life, he’d given her eternal death and damned the woman he loved to hell.
Thirty-eight
Thanatos screamed his throat raw as Regan melted into his body. It didn’t hurt, not physically, but mentally, it was excruciating. He’d killed her. Doomed her. And now she was suffering.
Only rarely could he feel the souls when he wasn’t wearing his armor, and normally that was a good thing. But not this time. Not now. He had to find her, latch onto the awareness that was uniquely her life force. Maybe he didn’t deserve to be comforted by her presence, but he hoped she’d be comforted by his.
As Limos and Ares stormed into the room, alerted by Than’s screams, he armored up. Instantly, the whirling vibration of the souls filtered through his body. Dragging in a shaky breath, he sorted through them, locked onto Regan, and collapsed into the chair beside the bed.
“Thanatos?” The concern in Limos’s voice gave it a higher pitch than normal, and when she saw Regan’s lifeless body, her voice broke low. “I’m so sorry.” She went to her knees next to the chair and braced her forehead on his arm.
Thanatos stared blindly, barely registering the fact that the medical people were filing out, leaving him alone with Limos and Ares.
And his son.
Ares had taken the infant from Vladlena and very carefully placed the swaddled baby against Than’s chest, forcing him to wrap his arm around his son. Than’s heart kicked, and he jerked as if he’d been dead and someone had shocked him back to life. Inside him, his blood warmed and Regan’s spirit quieted. Even the baby, who had been whimpering, settled peacefully in the crook of Than’s arm.
A sob escaped him as he dropped his gaze, getting his first true look at the child he and Regan had made. The baby’s eyes were hazel, like Regan’s, his wisps of hair as blond as Than’s. He was a perfect mix of the two of them.
“He’s beautiful,” Than whispered. As if in agreement, Regan seemed to caress him from the inside. “Regan thinks so, too.” His voice cracked at that, and dear God, how was he going to survive this?
Limos lifted her head to exchange glances with Ares. “Ah, Than? Regan … she didn’t make it.”
No shit. He stroked his finger over the baby’s velvety soft cheek. “She’s in my armor.”
“Oh … damn.” Ares drove his hand through his hair. “Are you okay?”
Thanatos looked up. “No.” He swallowed against the lump of misery in his throat, but that bastard wasn’t going anywhere. “I need her. I’ve got to do something.”
But what? He’d failed to turn her, and now her body was an empty shell while her soul rested inside him. She was at peace right now, but it wouldn’t be long before the other souls began to torment her, and it would be even worse when he took off his armor and couldn’t control the souls.
He’d never remove his armor again.
“Maybe Reaver can guide her soul out,” Ares suggested. “You won’t have to worry about her that way.”
Thanatos was willing to try anything to prevent Regan from being sent to Sheoul-gra once she escaped the armor. He just had to hope Reaver was receptive to the idea. And was capable of doing it.
“It’s worth a try.”
“I’ll see if he’s back.” Ares jogged out of the room and was back in a flash. “He’s not here. I hope he’s kicking Gethel’s traitorous ass. In any case, I’ve sent a summons.”
Thanatos couldn’t wait. Regan didn’t deserve a single minute inside the hell of his armor, but who else dealt in souls? Wait…
“Where’s Idess? Is she okay?”
Limos nodded. “Eidolon healed her. She’s in the great room. Why?”
“I need her to take me to her father.” The male who could also be the Horsemen’s father.
There was a pause and then Limos’s eyes flared. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
“If you’re thinking that he’s the Grim Reaper and if anyone can help, he can, then yes.”
She was up in a heartbeat. “I’ll be right back.”
Than reached up and took his sister’s hand. “Thank you, Li. I won’t forget this.”
Tears sprang into her eyes. “I might not have liked Regan at first, but she gave you something you haven’t had in five thousand years. You were happy. And she gave you a son. I’ll do anything for the three of you.”
Closing his eyes, he leaned back and held his son close. Than had meant it when he’d told Regan he would have loved to have pampered her for the months he missed out on while their son was growing inside her. Hell, he’d have pampered her for the rest of her life. He’d have given her anything she wanted.
Now all he could give her was peace.
Thirty-nine
A massive ebony Greek temple rose up out of the mist in front of Thanatos. Blackened pillars and buildings surrounded it, all familiar, and yet, he couldn’t place it. After a few steps, as the fog cleared away, he realized that this was Athens. Not the real Athens, but an imitation land where everything was corrupted by evil and death.
Thanatos should be right at home, shouldn’t he, he thought bitterly.
Idess had been more than willing to help him, and as he carried Regan’s dead body in his arms and her soul in his armor, Idess touched his back in a gesture of strength and comfort.
“Thank you for rescuing me from Pestilence.”
He didn’t want to discuss it, but his brother had tortured her and she deserved more than silence. “I’m sorry for what he did to you. Pestilence was as desperate to find your father as I was.” Pestilence’s goal had probably been as much to destroy their father as it was to gain access to Sheoul-gra. More of that getting rid of anything personal thing.
“Why did you want to find Azagoth?”
Than stared blankly ahead. “It doesn’t matter now.” Yeah, he wanted to confront his father for a lot of reasons, but those reasons weren’t nearly as important anymore.
Idess’s expression grew hard. “Well, Pestilence would never have found him. I wouldn’t have given anything up.” Her strength reminded him of Regan, and he nearly faltered as he mounted the giant steps to the temple.
“Are you sure I had to bring her body with us?” he asked hoarsely.
Idess’s sad smile almost made him break down again. No, he hadn’t taken it well when she’d told him, nor when he’d had to put down his son to leave his keep. The boy was now part of Than’s heart, and being away from him seemed to make it stop pumping.
“No,” she admitted, “but if he can see you with her, your pain might be more…real…to him.” She started forward. “He’s not the warmest individual you’ll ever meet, so you have to take advantage where you can find it.”
The King Kong-esque double doors opened, and inside, endless passages stretched as far as Than could see. Everything was black, just like outside, except that inside the temple, all the surfaces gleamed. Statues of humans and demons in pain lined the rooms and halls, and the fountain they walked past in the giant fore-room ran with blood.
“Your dad has interesting tastes in art,” he muttered.
“‘Interesting’ is one word for it.” She led him through a maze of hallways that never changed. “Have you thought of a name?”
“Name?”
“For your son.” Her smile was warm. “He’s beautiful.”
“Yeah,” he choked out. “He is. And no, we didn’t discuss names.”
“I’m sure whatever you choose will be perfect.” She stopped at a door—how she knew which of the hundreds of identical doors they’d passed was the right one, he had no idea—and reached for the handle. “You ready?”
As if Regan knew what this was about, she made herself known, and warmth spread from his armor to his skin. “As I’ll ever be.”
Idess opened the door, and they stepped over the threshold into a bright, colorful office of sorts. A tall male with black hair was standing in front of the archway to what looked like the cut-out side of a tunnel, so he could see the souls of dead demons being escorted by griminions through it like an assembly line. The male held up his hand and the parade stopped.
Thanatos held his breath as the guy turned around. “Idess. Sweetheart, it’s good to see you.”
“Father.” She inclined her head in a respectful nod.
Azagoth turned his emerald-ice gaze on Thanatos. “Death. Interesting to finally meet you.” He gestured to the people in the tunnel. “You’ve sent me so many of my subjects.”
“I do what I can to help,” Than said dryly. “And now I need you to do the same.”
One black eyebrow lifted. “I’m guessing this has something to do with the corpse you’re carrying?”
Corpse. On his arm Styx reared up, his actions not reflecting Thanatos’s sudden anger but his own. At some point, the stallion had learned to like Regan, and he didn’t appreciate the dismissive, cold words any more than Thanatos did.
Idess had warned Than about the guy, so he kept his temper in check. He could rip Azagoth a new one after he got what he wanted.
“She’s the mother of my child. She would have been my wife. I killed her.”
“Why?” Azagoth folded his arms across his chest, looking utterly bored. “Did she betray you? Warm someone else’s bed? One of your brothers’, perhaps?”