“It comforts and calms me, even when we’re wild. Orgasm is a great physical release of tension and I like that you’re bigger and stronger than me. It’s probably a psychological thing or maybe some primal instinct. Who knows? Is it a problem?”
“Hell no, believe me, Lilith, I’m not complaining, but I don’t like seeing you all stressed out. If you want me to tell everybody to just leave us alone…”
“No, Adam. I’m going to make sure that we have exactly the day we want, if it kills me, but I do still want them to be involved. Are you saying you’ve reached your comfort limit for now though?” I traced a finger up along his bicep.
“Are you kidding me? Baby, we haven’t come close to my limit.” And with that, he gave me a sexy smile, rolled me onto my back, and comforted me again. Twice.
We eventually went over to my place, where my mother had arrived, and upon seeing my building, had immediately begun trying to find somewhere else to stay. Luckily, that meant she was too occupied pushing buttons on her phone to judge and bitch the whole time we were there.
Adam and I gathered all of his stuff, and a whole bunch of mine, and making several trips, managed to semi-move me in with him. I would have to decide what to do with all of my furniture. I would also have to find a corner to write in at his place. I hadn’t worked on my current novel in a couple of weeks. At least I finally had clean undies again.
We didn’t feel up to going out that night, so we just picked up takeout on the way home and decided to watch a movie. We were just deciding which one, when I got a call from my friend Bruce.
“Jason has to pull a double shift at the hospital tonight. Entertain me.”
“Entertain you how?” I asked, mouthing “Bruce” to Adam, who nodded with understanding.
“What are you doing tonight?”
“We were just going to watch a movie.”
“Don’t start without me. I’ll be right there.” He clicked off.
“Wait! Bruce! I’m at Adam’s!” But it was too late. I tried calling him back but it went straight to voicemail. “Great, Bruce is headed to my place for entertainment.”
“Hope that he finds your mother entertaining,” Adam said, flipping through channels and pausing on some sports talk show.
“Oh my God! That’s right. I have to warn him.” I tried calling again but he still wasn’t picking up. I sighed.
“She won’t even be there anymore. She’s probably at the Marriott by now. He’ll figure it out when he gets there and nobody’s home.”
“You’re right. Although, I’m sure that the experience of having visited my apartment will be worth it to her, since she’ll have something else to judge me about forever.”
“Ignore her. You don’t need her approval.” I sat down next to him, giving him a loving squeeze. “The only opinion that matters is mine.” I poked him in the ribs. “Hey! Watch it.” He laughed.
We just sat and cuddled while he watched Sports Center, or whatever it was, and I read. I felt myself truly relaxing for the first time in a long time. An hour later, Bruce returned my call.
“Buzz me up,” was all he said before clicking off. When Adam swung the door open five minutes later, an irate-looking g*y man glared at us from the hall.
“Hey, Bruce. How’s it going?” Adam asked with a smile.
“You didn’t tell me that your mother was in town.” He put his hands on his hips and gave me his best pouty face. Then he stomped his foot for good measure. Yes, actually stomped his foot. Of late, Bruce had been very Bette Davis. I’m not sure what had led him to unleash his inner-gay stereotype, but he was playing it to the hilt.
“She was still there? I tried to warn …” I began as he stormed past us.
“I can’t believe you’ve never introduced me to such a charming woman!” I furrowed my brow, searching his face for a hint of sarcasm but amazingly there wasn’t one.
“Did you say charming?” I asked, thinking I must have misunderstood him.
“I showed up at your hovel and found her there. At first I just thought it was you looking really haggard, but she introduced herself properly and the two of us had the best chat! I can’t believe you just abandoned her to the ghetto.”
“Did you know that she was in labor with you for twenty-three hours?”
“I’m going to be getting another work-out, aren’t I,” Adam asked, looking resigned.
“So, of course, we got around to planning your wedding.”
“Of course,” I mumbled through gritted teeth.
“Let me eat some more first, Lily. I need the calories for energy,” Adam pleaded.
We sat listening to Bruce go on about the most “brilliant” wedding planner ever to walk the face of the Earth, someone named Mr. Jonathan. The way Bruce described him, Mr. Jonathan could design the wedding of century while curing cancer and splitting the atom.
As it turned out, my mother’s former law firm had done some work for him and he owed her a favor. Bruce was practically peeing his pants with excitement about the prospect of getting to observe the maestro up close. I had a feeling that was why he was so charmed by the Ice Queen.
“So, this guy Jonathan is a genius at weddings,” Adam said. “Maybe we should just let him do everything. We can just show up and not worry about it.”
“Oh, he’ll want your input. Part of his genius is matching the event to the couple. He’ll want to interview you and get a feel for your entire relationship together, and then he’ll suggest a unifying theme.”
“What, like combat?” Adam asked with a laugh.
“Yeah, he’s right,” I agreed. “Our history together wasn’t exactly filled with lollipops and rainbows. He wrote in my name on our class election ballot as Queen of the Harpies.”
“How do you know that was me?’
“Who else would have done something like that?”
“Well, you sent forged documents to the nurse’s office, claiming I needed to give a stool sample.”
“You have no proof.”
“I’m sure he can work with it,” Bruce interrupted.
“Well, he can consult, but I get final say on everything. I’m the bride,” I reminded him.
“Don’t you own anything other than p**n , violent movies, old baseball games and the X-Files?” Bruce called out, sounding disgruntled, while Adam and I cleaned up. Clearly, no one had ever defined “guest” for Bruce.