“Watch it or I’ll start telling Lily about what you’ve handled in the past,” Mark said, giving Adam an amused look.

“Like what?” I asked curiously, and Adam gave Mark a death glare which just made him crack up. There was a lot of laughter in this apartment tonight. Before Adam could become too homicidal there was a knock at the door.

“And so it begins,” Braden said ominously.

Chapter Thirty-One

We all had our roles. Adam and I would be hosting. Cam was our bartender and Jess kept the snacks replenished. Mark and Braden were security, a key role, considering what we had just witnessed. Bruce was, as he described it, ‘that guy who got the party going,’ which I understood to be sort of like a debauched cruise director. Gab was our deejay and she had brought her 80s Party Hits playlist. At the moment, The Talking Heads were starting to sing Burning Down the House. I hoped nobody would get any ideas. I followed Adam, who went over and swung the door open with a flourish. Herb stood there with a bottle of ginger ale, a wilted potted plant and a ‘Welcome to Philadelphia’ t-shirt.

“Are you the Key Master?” Adam asked, and I pushed him aside.

“Hi, Herb. How are you?” I asked, trying to sound as friendly as possible.

“Hey, Lily! I’m great, thanks. Got your invitation. I really appreciate you inviting me. Congratulations on your new romance by the way.” He looked up at Adam, seeming somewhat confused by his greeting. Maybe he was the one person in the world who hadn’t seen Ghostbusters. I elbowed Adam.

“Herbert, dude, how are you doing?” Adam asked, going over and clapping him on the back. Herb hurtled forward. “Herbert is your full name, right?”

“Yes. Well, I mean, that is the full form of my name. Although Herbert is actually my middle name. My first name is David, but I don’t really like it.”

“You prefer Herbert over David?” I asked, trying not to judge.

“Yeah, it’s just that people used to call me Dave, and I’m not really a Dave. Daves are athletes, and class presidents. I’m really much more of a Herb.”

“I see.” I nodded understandingly. “Well, Herb, let me take those.” I gestured toward his armful of offerings.

“Oh yeah. I brought ginger ale because you can have just as is, or you could use it as a mixer.” He said it in a tone that made it sound like he was imparting the wisdom of the ages.

“Good thinking, Herb,” Adam said with a smile. “I could tell right off the bat you were a thinker. That’s probably why SEPTA hired you. They appreciate people who think, rather than do anything down there. How long have you worked for them anyway?”

“Nine years on Monday!” When anyone mentioned the Philadelphia mass transit system Herb got a light in his eyes.

“Are those for us?” I reminded him, gesturing again at the plant that would be needing life support shortly.

“Oh, yes, uh, the plant is for you, Lily, and the t-shirt is for Adam, to welcome him.” Adam and I had grown up ten minutes from Philly, incidentally.

“Thanks, Herb! Hey, you know Mark over there was just telling me that he wished he knew more about SEPTA’s safety record.”

“Really?” Herb looked like he was going to wet his pants. He thrust the plant and the t-shirt at me and practically vaulted over the couch to get to Mark. As soon as he was out of earshot Adam turned to me.

“Well, he does have a fox connection after all.”

“You caught that too,” I said, impressed by his intellect, and feeling a familiar warm rush and pull in my nether regions.

“Of course I did,” Adam said, giving me a sexy smile. “David Herbert Lawrence, D. H. Lawrence, author of Lady Chatterley’s Lover, Sons and Lovers and …”

“The Fox,” I finished, smiling back. “You know I feel strangely turned on that we both knew that.” Ideas of sneaking him off to the bedroom were occurring to me. I really was becoming a nympho. Adam was like a drug.

“Me too. Your mind is very sexy. Want to sneak off and grab a quickie?” he asked, as if reading my thoughts. I didn’t get to answer, though, because the rest of our party was arriving, with U. Hu leading the pack. Wow, I didn’t think he would actually come.

“Mr. Hu, I’m so …” I started to say as U. Hu darted past me and went directly to look out my window. “Uh, Mr. Davis, how are you?” Right behind U. Hu, stood my elderly neighbor, looking all spiffed up in a suit and tie and holding a single red rose. He gave me a lecherous smile.

“Here you go, cupcake. This is for you.” He handed me the rose and checked out the room. Then he went off to take a walk down memory lane with Gabrielle. I looked toward the door again, saw Yuri, and did a double-take. Yuri was kind of a scary guy.

“Good evening,” he said simply.

“Hey, Yuri, my man, how are you doing?” Adam said, punching him in the arm.

“You know, you’re one tall guy. I’ll bet you played ball in school, huh?”

“I vas a rower.”

“Really? Hey, see that other really tall dude over there? That’s Braden Pierce. He rowed for Harvard.”

Yuri looked interested and wandered off to talk to Braden. I noted, looking around the room, that U. Hu was peering surreptitiously out the window now, and that Mark’s eyes looked like they were glazing over as Herb hit his stride.

“You rowed for Boston University, didn’t you?” I asked Adam.

“Yeah, that’s how Braden and I originally met. I’m busy hosting, though. Hello there,” he said with a smile, as Mario and Regina came in.

“Yo, how’s it goin’?” Mario asked, congenially.

“Hi. I’m Regina Roselli. I don’t think we’ve met. Nice place! I love the décor.”

“Hi, Lily Adler and this is Adam Roth. You should go over and chat with Bruce,” I pointed. “He loves talking about decorating.”

“Great! Thanks!” She bee-lined for Bruce but Mario hung back.

“Booze is that way,” Adam indicated the kitchen where Cam was set up.

“Yo, thanks, man!” Mario bee-lined for the kitchen.

“Yo welcome,” Adam said with a smile.

“Hey Lil, hello Adam my Adam,” a raspy voice slurred from the doorway. Donna stood there, her wig slightly askew, one false eyelash a bit crooked. She had on a skin-tight lycra dress that left nothing to the imagination - nothing at all, unfortunately. Who knew you could get camel toe in a dress? Worse than the outfit, though, a cloud of pungent perfume surrounded her. The smell was so powerful that I almost gagged. I would probably never get it out of my apartment.




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