“I don’t understand?”
“Keller was going to ask you to go to the dance tonight.”
“He was?”
“Yeah…couldn’t you tell? He had on a shirt without stains and didn’t smell too bad,” I say.
She laughs. Then we fall into awkward silence. I turn, pulling my knee up on the seat to face her. There’s just enough moonlight to see her face. “Listen. I didn’t want Keller to ask you to the dance, because I wanted to be the one to go with you.”
“Okay…” she trails off, waiting for me to explain.
“But I don’t want to go to the dance.”
“But you don’t want me to go with Keller either?”
“No, I definitely don’t want you going with anyone else.” I rake my fingers through my hair, certain I’m bungling this. Then a thought dawns on me. But it makes more sense in my head than when I say it aloud. “Nikki, would you not go to the dance with me?”
She laughs. “And what does not going to the dance entail, exactly?”
“I don’t know. We’ll go somewhere. Just not to the dance.”
She laughs and shakes her head. “Sure. I’d love to not go to the dance with you, Zack.”
“Perfect.” Out of the corner of my eye, I catch the blinds on the front windows of the house move. Nikki turns, following my line of sight. The blinds move again. “I think we’re being watched,” I nod toward the house.
Nikki gasps. “Oh my god, we so are. I can’t believe my Aunt Claire is a snoop.”
I grin. “She’s probably just worried about you.”
“I guess.”
“But she’s totally aunt-blocking the kiss I’ve been thinking about for hours.”
Nikki whirls back around. “You’ve been thinking about kissing me for hours?”
Shit. I didn’t mean to give that much away. “Ever since you intentionally brushed your leg up against mine,” I say.
“I did not intentionally brush my leg against yours!” Nikki protests. I was teasing, but her denying it so vehemently, makes me wonder if maybe she really did.
“And the way you moved your mouth while you were reading…”
“What about the way I moved my mouth?” Defensively, Nikki questions.
“You know.”
“No, I don’t know.”
Scooting closer to her on the old bench seat, I wrap my hand around her neck and pull her close. Her sharp intake of breath is audible. “Then you better get inside if you don’t want your Aunt to see me kiss you.”
This close, we’re both breathing heavily. I only mean to tease her, but I’m finding it hard to keep my resolve with her body so close to mine. She’s dangerous.
“Go!” I growl, afraid I’ll change my mind and give her aunt a good show. With a last, lingering look, she gets out of the car. I know I should probably walk her to the door. But I’m not sure I can even walk, so instead I wait till she’s safely inside before I pull away.
Chapter 25
Nikki
I lay on my back in the center of my bed, turning and turning the small hospital bands between my fingers. In the few weeks that I’ve been here, I’ve taken them out faithfully every night. Every night except for the last two nights since Zack and I sat along the overlook.
I don’t know how Zack and I found each other, but it’s the first time in my life that I’m starting to wonder if there really is such a thing as fate. Before now, fate was an escape…a fantasy, something that only happened in movies and books, where people paid for a happily ever after. Now I wonder if maybe, just maybe, I wound up here for a reason. Finding Zack— learning that he’s as wounded, lost and in need of a connection as I am— somehow validates I’m on the right path to wherever it is I’m going.
I’ve had boyfriends before. Well, sort of. I’ve kissed two and even let one get to second base. I say “let” because it just seemed like something I should experience…a hurdle I needed to cross before hitting a certain age I guess.
But how I feel with Zack is different. Really different. I want what’s happening to happen as much as he does. So much so that I’ve even let the search for my sister take a back seat to spending time with him. As I look down at the bracelets in my hand, I feel guilty for letting anything cloud my focus.
Aunt Claire knocks on my closed door. I shove the bracelets under the pillow and sit up just before she walks in.
“So, you haven’t changed your mind about missing the homecoming dance tonight?”
“No.” I shake my head. The morning after Zack asked me out, I was excited to tell Aunt Claire. Unfortunately, the feeling didn’t seem to be a shared one. Ashley thinks I’m overanalyzing it, that Aunt Claire is just concerned with me dating any boy. After all, this is new to her too. It’s just that she seemed excited when I told her someone asked me out, but deflated so quickly when I mentioned it was Zack. At first, I thought maybe she knew him, knew what he’d been through, but when I asked, she said she’d never met him before. Yet I’ve had the odd feeling her concern is more about who my date is, rather than about my going on a date at all.
“What are you two going to do tonight on your non-dance date?” Aunt Claire asks, sidestepping my boxes to sit on the edge of my bed. She hasn’t asked why I haven’t unpacked yet, it makes me wonder if she understands.