It almost made heartbreak worth enduring.
Almost.
Twelve
Carter
We showered. I washed her body, every fucking inch of that goodness, before I stepped out and left her alone. I collapsed onto the single bed, shaking my head for a moment at how puny the fucking thing was. It barely accommodated us. Sex had been a tight fit, and I wished she hadn’t beaten around the bush and had given us a room with a decent sized bed.
But I knew Leah. She would have got the room under the false assumption that two beds meant we wouldn’t run the risk of fucking. Her pathetic attempt was adorable, and I wanted to squeeze her to me and kiss that cute little mouth.
Needless to say, I was on a high. Fuck, I felt so alive. I got up and threw my jeans on. Unable to find my shirt, I walked out of the motel room shirtless and barefoot. It was too dark out, and no one was milling around. I kept my gaze planted to the ground anyway and approached the vending machines outside. I bought a couple bottles of water and a crap load of snacks. When I got back to the room, I threw them on the bed and turned something on the television. I felt restless, like all I wanted to do was go back in there and kiss the fuck out of her. I didn’t like being away, not for one second. What if she was under that water regretting what we’d just done? That possibility made me uneasy.
I had to win her over, make her remember what she felt for me. There was no way those feelings were gone. Not after what we’d just done.
She came out minutes later, flushed from the water, in nothing but a towel, smiling at me with this timid look on her face. I patted the bed and she climbed in next to me.
“I see we got dinner,” she said, motioning to the bags of chips.
“Memory road, baby,” I reminded her. “We had shit back then, remember?”
“True.” She grabbed a bag of potato chips and opened them.
We watched some television for a while in comfortable silence. She wormed her way against my side, resting her head on my chest as she watched and ate. With ease I’d never felt before, I combed through her hair, studying the soft golden strands in between my fingers.
This felt good.
Why had I ever taken it for granted before?
What the fuck was wrong me growing up to think that she’d ever hurt me? I was such a miserable little dick. This was perfection. There wasn’t some needy girl I had to please. There wasn’t an uncomfortable silence I had to break. I wasn’t the rock star that just bedded a girl using me to advance her own image.
It was just Leah and me.
“You gonna fulfil that fantasy of mine later?” I muttered out on a lazy grin.
“You talking about that trucker hat shit?” she asked, and I could hear the smile in her voice.
“Yeah, that.”
“Maybe.”
I didn’t press her. We watched for a little while. My hand roamed the side of her body, teasing along her towel line. Her skin was so smooth. Nothing like I remembered. The brain seriously dulls this shit down, probably to make the separation less painful.
“I imagined you every time I was with someone, or no one,” I found myself saying when the silence got too thick. “I needed that connection, and I never felt it with anyone else, not unless I pretended they were you. They were horrible replacements.”
“Well, if it makes you feel good, you were right about before,” she replied. “Nobody took care of me the way you do. Sexually, anyway.”
I frowned. “Sexually, but not emotionally. I can do that now, Leah.”
She didn’t respond to that. Instead, she pulled away from me and leaned over to grab the hat off the night stand. I watched as she put it on and turned to me, her long hair flowing down her shoulders, looking like a fucking dream. Without another word, she went up on her knees and unfolded the towel.
I knew what she was doing. Distracting me to keep from talking about anything serious. I wanted to press it. Believe me, pressing it was at the tip of my fucking tongue, but… Jesus, she was a damn expert at distractions. My cock was hardening without pause.
Completely naked, she straddled my hips, giving me a perfect view of her tits. My hands shot out to them, taking them in each palm. Oh, fuck, how many times had I wished for this?
“Is this fulfilling your fantasy?” she asked quietly, lust forming in those beautiful brown eyes.
“Once you slip my cock inside you, yeah,” I answered.
She pulled out a condom from my wallet before she unbuttoned my jeans. I helped slide them off of me. I gripped her tanned little hips and she teased the tip of my cock against her wet pussy before she slid the condom on. I breathed hard, knowing I would die a happy man after this kind of mind-blowing visual.
“You alright down there?” she cheekily asked me.
I smirked up at her. “If you don’t fuck me right this second, I might self-implode.”
She smiled, her cheeks already pink from need, and slowly came down over me. My fingers dug into her skin as she rode me, that damn fucking hat on her doing wicked things to me. I’d come right then and there if I didn’t have any willpower.
She took her time, grinding her tight little body against mine as she closed her eyes and rode out her pleasure.
“That’s it,” I growled out.
She leaned down and kissed me. My arm wrapped around her back tightly. I pounded into her and she gasped, crying out my name against my mouth. I slowed down, grabbing at her ass with my other hand.
“Grind me, Angel. Rub your pussy against me.”
She buried her face between my neck and shoulder, grinding into me, stimulating her clit as she went. Her breaths came out short and fast, and I pounded into her again before she came, her muscles tightening around my cock as I went.
I paused for a moment, letting her orgasm wash through her. When it died down, I pushed her up so that she was riding me again and took in that gorgeous satiated look on her face. Fucking hell, I could get used to this. I pinched her nipple as I started thrusting again, and my eyes roamed her tits and hips, taking every inch of her in before I looked back at her face.
Those damn doe-eyes were my undoing.
I came hard.
“Fuck, fuck, Leah.”
She collapsed over me. Chest against chest, I could feel our heartbeats racing. Racing, just like I was racing for time. I wrapped my arms around her, kissing her softly.
Be with me. I wanted to say.
Just be with me.
She fell asleep on me like that, and I never got the chance to say the words out loud.