“As you wish, Gwen Cassidy.”
She stooped and reached for her pack, but he moved swiftly and wrapped his hand around her wrist. “Nay. If you go, it stays with me.”
“I need a few things,” she hissed.
“You may take one item with you,” he said, reluctant to interfere if she had womanly needs. Mayhap it was her time of the moon.
Angrily, she dug in the pack and withdrew two items. A bar of something and a bag. Defiantly, she stuffed the bar in the bag and said, “See? It’s only one thing now.” She turned abruptly and headed for the woods.
“I’m sorry, lass,” he whispered when he was certain she was out of hearing range.
He had no choice but to make her his unwitting victim. Larger issues than his own life depended upon it.
Gwen hurriedly used the “facilities,” anxiously scanning the forest around her, but it didn’t appear that he had followed her. Still, she didn’t trust a thing about her current situation. After relieving herself, she devoured the protein bar she’d grabbed. She rummaged through her cosmetics bag, flossed, then dabbed a touch of toothpaste to her tongue. The taste of mint boosted her flagging spirits. A swipe of a medicated pad over her nose, cheeks, and forehead nearly made her swoon with pleasure.
Sweaty and exhausted, she felt more alive than ever. She was beginning to fear for her own sanity, because there was a part of her that wanted to believe him, wanted desperately to experience something outside of her everything-can-be-explained-by-science existence. She wanted to believe in magic, in men who made her feel hot and weak-kneed, and in crazy things like spells.
Nature or nurture: Which was the determining factor? She’d been obsessing over that question lately. She knew what nurture had done to her. At twenty-five, she had a serious intimacy problem. Aching for a thing she couldn’t name, and terrified of it at the same time.
But what was her nature? Was she truly brilliant and cold like her parents? She recalled all too well the time she’d been foolish enough to ask her father what love was. Love is an illusion clung to by the fiscally challenged, Gwen. It makes them feel life might be worth living. Choose your mate by IQ, ambition, and resources. Better yet, let us choose him for you. Already I have several suitable matches in mind.
Before she’d indulged in her Great Fit of Rebellion, she’d dutifully dated a few of her father’s choices. Dry, intellectual men, they’d regarded her more often than not through eyes red-rimmed from constant peering into a microscope or textbook, with little interest in her as a person, and great interest in what her formidable parents might do for their careers. There’d been no passionate declarations of undying love, only fervent assurances that they would make a brilliant team.
Gwendolyn Cassidy, the sheltered daughter of famous scientists who had elevated themselves from stark poverty as children to esteemed positions at Los Alamos National Laboratory doing top-secret quantum research for the Department of Defense, had had a nearly impossible time getting a date outside of the cliquish scientific community in which she’d been raised. At college it had been even worse. Men had dated her for three reasons: to try to get in good with her parents, to see if she had any theories worth stealing, and, last but not least, for the prestige of dating the “prodigy.” Those few who’d been attracted by her other endowments (translated: generous C cups) hadn’t lingered long after learning who she was and what courses she was acing while they were hardly managing to skate by.
She’d been frighteningly cynical by twenty-one.
She’d dropped out of the doctorate program at twenty-three, carving an irrevocable schism between herself and her parents.
Lonely as hell by twenty-five. A veritable island.
Two years ago, she’d thought changing jobs—taking a nice, normal, average job with nice, normal, average people who weren’t scientists—would fix her problems. She’d tried so hard to fit in and build a new life for herself. But she’d finally realized it wasn’t her career choice that was the problem.
Although she’d told herself that she’d come to Scotland to shuck her virginity, the small deception was how she concealed her deeper and much more fragile motives.
The problem was—Gwen Cassidy didn’t know if she had a heart.
When Drustan had spoken so passionately of what he was looking for in a woman, she’d nearly flung herself at him, madman or no. Family, talking, taking quiet pleasure in the simple lush beauty of the Highlands, having children who would be loved. Fidelity, bonding, and a man who wouldn’t kiss another woman if he were wed. She sensed that Drustan was a bit of an island himself.