Ere the half-hour ended, five o'clock struck; school was dismissed,

and all were gone into the refectory to tea. I now ventured to

descend: it was deep dusk; I retired into a corner and sat down on

the floor. The spell by which I had been so far supported began to

dissolve; reaction took place, and soon, so overwhelming was the

grief that seized me, I sank prostrate with my face to the ground.

Now I wept: Helen Burns was not here; nothing sustained me; left to

myself I abandoned myself, and my tears watered the boards. I had

meant to be so good, and to do so much at Lowood: to make so many

friends, to earn respect and win affection. Already I had made

visible progress: that very morning I had reached the head of my

class; Miss Miller had praised me warmly; Miss Temple had smiled

approbation; she had promised to teach me drawing, and to let me

learn French, if I continued to make similar improvement two months

longer: and then I was well received by my fellow-pupils; treated

as an equal by those of my own age, and not molested by any; now,

here I lay again crushed and trodden on; and could I ever rise more?

"Never," I thought; and ardently I wished to die. While sobbing out

this wish in broken accents, some one approached: I started up--

again Helen Burns was near me; the fading fires just showed her

coming up the long, vacant room; she brought my coffee and bread.

"Come, eat something," she said; but I put both away from me,

feeling as if a drop or a crumb would have choked me in my present

condition. Helen regarded me, probably with surprise: I could not

now abate my agitation, though I tried hard; I continued to weep

aloud. She sat down on the ground near me, embraced her knees with

her arms, and rested her head upon them; in that attitude she

remained silent as an Indian. I was the first who spoke "Helen, why do you stay with a girl whom everybody believes to be a

liar?"

"Everybody, Jane? Why, there are only eighty people who have heard

you called so, and the world contains hundreds of millions."

"But what have I to do with millions? The eighty, I know, despise

me."

"Jane, you are mistaken: probably not one in the school either

despises or dislikes you: many, I am sure, pity you much."

"How can they pity me after what Mr. Brocklehurst has said?"




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